Kopan Course No. 12 (1979)

By Kyabje Lama Zopa Rinpoche
Kathmandu, Nepal November 1979 (Archive #350)

The following is a transcript of teachings given by Lama Thubten Zopa Rinpoche at the Twelfth Kopan Meditation Course. Included is a commentary on Shantideva's Bodhicaryavatara (A Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life). The transcript also includes a lecture by Lama Thubten Yeshe and the "Question and Answer" session that followed this lecture. Read an edited excerpt from Lama's lecture here. You may also download the entire contents of these teachings in a pdf file.

Section Six: Lectures 34-39

Mahayana Precepts December 1st

The nature of the life is nothing definite in this world, the actual time of my death is nothing definite. More conditions for death, less conditions for living. The body is so fragile, like a water bubble, it is very easy to decay like a water bubble.

Secondly, from birth until now I have been living just on this breath, my life depends on it. How has it been existing, by depending on what? Just merely the movement of the breath, breath, which has the nature of moving, breathing in and out. My life exists merely by depending on the breath coming in and out. Merely the movement of the breath, just that, my life has been existing by depending on this. Once this movement of the breath stops there is no more functioning, life has ended. Even a machine is broken it can be fixed by the person. Once this breath completely stops there is nothing to fix it again. It is so fragile, like this. It is so easy for death to appear, the life to stop, and uncertain when it will stop.

So it is amazing, it is like a dream—from birth time so many years one has been living, not having died, until now, 20, 30, 35, 40 years, able to live that many years is amazing, like a dream. How many people died on this earth before reaching my age, in the mother’s womb, child, not having time to live up to my age. Since I was born until now there have been many well-arranged conditions where I was about to die, where my death could have happened, almost having a car accident, almost falling down, almost somebody attacking or killing—various conditions for death to happen. If I died last year where would I be now? Maybe born as a fish? I wasn’t able to do much purification or collect merits, unable to practice Dharma, to have complete confidence, even if I have practiced Dharma, not enough to have full confidence in my mind at death time to not be born in the lower realms. By now maybe born as fish, caught and eaten, the body sliced, cut in half, become somebody’s food. By now being born as crab, somebody put in boiling hot water, feeling incredible suffering.

While I was sleeping last night in the sleeping bag, while I was dreaming, suddenly the death occurred. By now, having fallen asleep and died last night, like dreaming, being in the intermediate state like a dream, waking up this morning suddenly in the narak realm, the red hot burning iron ground—suddenly the body is there, like waking up from the sleep, having no single method what to do. Having such unbearable suffering, either in hot suffering or cold suffering—the body being of one nature with ice, can’t see one’s limbs, completely dark, many birds having long pointed sharp beaks eating my flesh, cannot see anything around, even one’s own body. Then extremely cold air passing through, suffering more cold, body is getting more cracks, turning red, then turning blue, going through unbelievable sufferings of cold. Even the tiniest cold suffering of naraks, putting together and comparing, all the ice on this earth cannot compare to the tiniest cold energy of the narak suffering—it is nothing, nothing, it is still a great pleasure compared to the tiniest slightest cold suffering of the naraks. If it was like this, what could I do? Even if I take refuge—cannot find refuge.

So, death not having occurred, so far from birth till now one is able to live, especially today, again today, not having lost the precious human rebirth, qualified with eight freedoms and ten richnesses, having chance to practice Dharma again today, I am highly fortunate. So must be careful living my life today, must make it highly meaningful without wasting it. If it is uncertain which will occur first, next year or next life, next life is more definite. In this month, death occurring or not occurring, it is uncertain, it is more definite for death to occur this month. Even this week it is uncertain whether death will or will not occur—it is more definite for death to happen. Even tomorrow, it is uncertain whether tomorrow or the next life will occur first—it is more definite for death to happen so more definite for next life to happen first. It is uncertain tonight, it is more definite for death and the next life to happen than this evening. Even this morning, even this hour, what is more definite to happen, death to occur or not—it is more definite for death to happen, more definite to happen the next life.

If death happens now, because the karma that has been mostly accumulated is mostly non-virtuous karma, it has not been purified well. I didn’t get it done yet. So in which realm I’ll be reborn if I die now? None other than the lower realm. It’s very close, not far. It is right after this breath stops—after the breath stops it is the lower realm. It’s that far away.

Therefore it is not sufficient today to take the ordination, accumulating merit and purifying. Even myself being born in the realm of the happy transmigratory beings is still in the nature of samsara, in a suffering realm. Even if one has achieved nirvana it is not sufficient, release from samsara. Beings who have been kind in the past, who are extremely kind even now, who will be extremely kind as long as I am in samsara, who are extremely kind in my beginning practice of Dharma, in the middle, even to the completion, enlightenment. The beings are devoid of temporal and ultimate happiness, constantly suffering, experiencing true suffering and true cause of the suffering. I must free each sentient being from all the suffering of samsara by myself, therefore I must achieve enlightenment, and therefore I am going to take ordination until tomorrow sunrise.

Lecture 34, December 1st am

“I must attain enlightenment at any rate, quicker and quicker, for the benefit of all the mother sentient beings, therefore, I’m going to listen to the commentary of the steps of the path to enlightenment.”

So please listen to the subject, this lamrim teaching, it is well expounded by the highly realized pandits the propagators, Nagarjuna and Asanga. It is profound advice as if the essence of the highly realized bodhisattva, Atisha and the Dharma king of the three worlds, the great Lama Tsongkhapa’s infinite knowledge, as it was taken out. This contains all the essence of the 84,000 teachings shown by Guru Shakyamuni Buddha without missing anything; All these are set up for the gradual practice for one person to achieve enlightenment. And this commentary of the steps of the path to enlightenment has four basic outlines; the last one is how to lead the disciple by showing the actual body of these teachings. That has two outlines; the last one is the graduate how to train the mind in the steps of the path to enlightenment by following the guru. That has two outlines: persuading the mind in order to have the essence of this perfect human body, and how to take the essence with the perfect human body.

The particular subject here, at this time, we have found the precious human body qualified with eight freedoms and ten richness, which is highly meaningful.

What is it that is hard to find such this perfect human body again? What makes to waste this perfect human body, unable to practice? Even though there’s opportunity to practice holy Dharma, but unable to practice; always the time, the life is passing by doing meaningless work of this life. Even if one has met Buddha Dharma, but time is always passing, the life is finishing all the time without having done, being unable to practice holy Dharma. Even if one has understanding of the holy Dharma, but time, the life is always passing without having done anything, being unable to practice the holy Dharma. So what is it—what makes it?

That is all the difficulty, unable to practice holy Dharma even if one has met holy Dharma—all the confusion of this life, like the door from where all the confusions of this life, everyday life confusions, comes, like the door. That is this evil thought of the worldly concern or this worldly thought, the worldly thought.

Even if one takes religious form, wearing the religious decorations, wearing rosary, having shaved hair, even if one is in religious form, wearing robes, saying prayers; even if one takes the religious form as a Dharma practitioner, then the action not becoming Dharma. Outside form the seeker of liberation, but not having mind seeking liberation, even if one has taken the form of the liberation-seeker, but not having mind seeking liberation. Even if one has taken the religious form of Dharma practitioner, the actions unable to become Dharma, the actions become only the worldly dharma, only meaningless work, always mind being under the control of the evil thought of the eight worldly dharma, being attached to the happiness of this life, the reputation, being attached to the material receiving, being attached to receiving admiration from other people, feeling hate.

So, before saying that, being attached to those things, these four objects, always time is passed in order to gain these four objects; whatever action is done, it is done to gain these four things. As there is dislike, hate of suffering, not receiving materials or criticism, dislike, one hates to receive criticism or a bad reputation, so whatever actions are done, they are done in order to not meet these objects of dislike. To obtain those four other objects of attachment, to stop, not to meet these four unlikable objects. So whole energy and time is spent for that, the energy is put for that. Whatever action is done, day and night, it becomes only action to obtain these objects of attachment and to stop the four unlikable objects. The whole action that is done day and night all the time—saying prayers, meditating, studying, whatever is done, only completely becomes work of the evil thought of the worldly dharma.

Because of this, even if one changed the outside form, wearing robes, in the aspect of the religious person, in the actions no great meaning is done. In the actions, no great meaning, nothing for the three types of advantage—the great advantage to receive happiness of future life, nirvana and enlightenment—none of these three great advantages in practice. How much one has been studying Dharma, how much one has been listening to the teachings, how much one had been educated, how much one has been studying, how much one has been receiving education, mind never became subdued; the mind becoming more and more solid, becoming more and more like iron. How much one receives education, how much understanding of Dharma one has, instead of the mind becoming more and more subdued, becoming more and more solid. The mind is becoming more and more thick-skulled, nothing benefiting, difficult to benefit the mind, difficult to fertilize the mind, to subdue the mind—all these are the shortcomings of the evil thought of worldly dharma. The definition of whether the action is holy Dharma, the definition of the holy Dharma, whether it is holy Dharma or not is differentiated by whether this life is renounced or not; whether the evil thought of worldly dharma is renounced or not. Having renounced the evil thought of worldly dharma, that is, as I mentioned yesterday morning, the every first step, as the Kadampa geshes always advised, as they always said.

The beginning of the meditation is the motivation; the beginning of the lamrim meditation is the eight freedoms and ten richnesses; the beginning of the holy Dharma is renouncing this life. The beginning of the holy Dharma is renouncing this life, which means renouncing the evil thought of the worldly dharma, the confused mind. So, it is possible that one can do Dharma, reciting mantra, saying prayers, all things like that, one can do this Dharma with worldly dharma; this happens.

You see, Dharma—saying prayers, making offerings, making charity, all these things, such types of actions, it can be mixed—can be done together. But the holy Dharma, renouncing this life, and worldly dharma, attached to the happiness of this life, these two things never happen together, okay? One mind cannot do these two things together: the holy Dharma, renouncing this life and the worldly dharma, seeking the happiness of this life. Those two things one person can do but one mind cannot do. The holy Dharma and the worldly dharma, one mind cannot do at the same time. Together with worldly dharma, one mind can do that together.

Such as those actions, meditation, making offerings, all those things, since it is done with worldly dharma, it cannot become holy Dharma, because they are opposite; holy Dharma and worldly dharma are completely opposite. Even if such actions are done looking outwardly like religious actions, Dharma actions, since it is mixed with worldly dharmas, it doesn’t become holy Dharma.

As the Kadampa Geshe, the great bodhisattva Potowa said, “A needle that has two points (of course, generally it is pointed, but what I am saying is, without having holes, the other point, completely pointed, without having holes). With that needle you can’t sew. With a needle that has two points you can’t sew cloths.” When the Dharma is mixed with the worldly dharma, it doesn’t become holy Dharma, it will only become cause of samsara, cause of the suffering of the lower realms, the cause of samsara.

When the great yogi Milarepa was leaving to the mountains where his great guru Marpa had advised him to go, to meditate on the teachings, which had been given by Marpa. When Milarepa was going to the mountains to meditate, the great Lama Marpa went outside with Milarepa, outside from the room a few steps, to send him off. This was Lama Marpa’s final advice to the great yogi Milarepa, “Son, without having renounced this life, if you mix the worldly dharmas and the holy Dharma, you lose the holy Dharma, so, reflect on the sufferings of samsara. It cannot be finished, even if I transform hundreds of tomes and explain how suffering of samsara is this, it cannot be finished explaining. Even I transform hundreds of tomes, it cannot be finished explaining. Even I explained for millions and millions of eons, it cannot be finished explaining. So don’t waste the holy Dharma that I have explained to you.” This was the final advice given by Lama Marpa to his disciple Milarepa.

Also the great bodhisattva Thogme Sangpo, the one who wrote The 37 Practices of the Bodhisattva: “There is nobody who accomplishes together the holy Dharma and the work of this life. There is no doubt that one cheats oneself, those who wish to achieve together the works of this life and the holy Dharma.”

And the bodhisattva Thogme Sangpo says, “Even if I actually meet you, I have no other thing to say except this. I have no other advice, except this. You go back to your own place and keep your body, speech and mind in virtue.” These different words of advice of the Kadampa geshe, the bodhisattva Thogme Sangpo and Lama Marpa are very effective; effective in order to practice the holy Dharma and in order to control the evil thought of worldly dharma.

The bodhisattva Thogme Sangpo said, “There is no doubt that one cheats oneself if one wishes to do both. Wishing to achieve enlightenment without renouncing this life, without renouncing the evil thought of worldly dharma, while one is doing the work of this life, then from that, between all the works of this life, somewhere between this busy life, the work of this life, kind of expecting to receive enlightenment comfortably, quickly and comfortably; somewhere between the works of this life, somewhere between that work done with the evil thought of the worldly dharmas, to receive enlightenment suddenly, immediately—expecting like that.”

However, without having understood one definition, what is holy Dharma and what is not holy Dharma, there is a great danger to waste the whole life, but oneself believes, “I have been meditating for so many years, 30, 40, 50 years, meditating, retreating,” oneself believes, but the reason not having understood the definitions of worldly dharma and holy Dharma, complete life spent, the whole meditation, the whole thing becomes worldly dharma; nothing becoming the pure Dharma, the holy Dharma. The whole life is finished in that, being ignorant, unable to do pure Dharma.

So it is no surprise for me when I hear somebody is keeping silent for many years, when I hear somebody say, “Oh he is so great, so holy, or great, blah, blah,” or “Making retreat for so many years,” or “He says prayers every day, he says prayer all day, keeping silent, saying prayers all day, while sitting on bed,” or “He meditates all day without seeing anybody,” nothing of these kind of things. “He doesn’t eat food, he doesn’t sleep at night-time, doesn’t eat food or even water,” nothing of this is surprising for me. Those kind of things you can do, there are many people who do, with pride, with the evil thought worldly dharma, there are many who can bear the hardships, to obtain happiness for the self, happiness of this life, who gives up the life even if it causes the life danger, who gives up life. Like, for instance, you can hire people to kill somebody, you can hire by giving million dollars, you can hire people. They know it is dangerous, but still they are able to give up their life, you see, for which they can get very much money, so that they can use in the future life. They can spend on the way in the intermediate stage, in the chai shops, they can buy chocolate, coffee on the way, while they are on the way to the next life, next rebirth—I’m only joking.

One can burn the body in the fire, for reputation. Anyway without talking much, those kind of things, when somebody says how good he is, or how holy he is, by reasoning like that, doesn’t surprise me at all. What surprises me, what makes devotion rise, what makes it rise is cutting off attachment; that is the greatest surprise, otherwise whatever surprises me, whatever he does. This is the most difficult thing, controlling the evil thought of worldly dharma, cutting off the evil thought of worldly dharma; this is the most difficult thing. The person who is able to do this, this is the greatest surprise. The person who is able to face this, that is the greatest surprise. You see, non-Dharma practitioners, the ones who only seek the happiness of this life, they can’t face the evil thought of worldly dharma. Who can face it is only who is renouncing the evil thought of the worldly dharma.

Because the worldly dharma and holy Dharma cannot mix together—when one does worldly dharma it doesn’t become holy Dharma, when one does holy Dharma it doesn’t become worldly dharma.

Dromtonpa, one time when he was in Tibet at the place called Reting, one day he saw an old man, who was circumambulating the temple. Dromtonpa asked the old man what he was doing, and the old man said, “I am circumambulating this temple.” The old man believed that he is doing holy Dharma, practicing holy Dharma, the older man believed that he is doing holy Dharma, practicing holy Dharma. Dromtonpa advised him, “It is good that you are circumambulating the temple, but isn’t it better to practice Dharma, wouldn’t it be better to practice holy Dharma.” The old man thought, “Oh what he meant might be reading scriptures,” so then he started to read only scriptures, without circumambulating the temple; he stopped circumambulating the temple, and read scriptures.

Then one day, as Dromtonpa came along he saw the old man having big piles of texts in front of him and reading scripture, then again he asked, “What are you doing?” “I am reading scriptures.” He’s still believing that he is doing, practicing holy Dharma, and so Dromtonpa said, “It is good that you are reading scriptures, but wouldn’t it better to practice holy Dharma?” So he thought, “Oh now what he meant, what he meant by holy Dharma might mean meditating with crossed legs, sitting up and doing meditation, that’s what he might mean practicing holy Dharma!” So then he stopped reading scriptures, and he tried to sit in meditating position and meditate. So again one day Dromtonpa came along and then met the old man meditating, and asked, “What are you doing?” Then the old man said, “Oh I am meditating.” He believed he is practicing holy Dharma, sitting in that position, meditating; then Dromtonpa advised him, “It is good that you are meditating, but wouldn’t it be better to practice holy Dharma.”

So the old man was completely confused, he did not know that he meant practicing holy Dharma, he tried with circumambulating, he tried with reading scriptures, he tried with sitting straight, meditating, keeping quiet, and then he asked Dromtonpa, “What do you mean by practicing holy Dharma?” So, Dromtonpa advised him, gave answer, “Renounce this life.”

Also the great bodhisattva, Lama Atisha, when he gives advice to other people, somebody asked, I don’t remember certainly which of the Kadampa geshes asked to give teaching from Lama Atisha, I don’t remember, but one Kadampa geshe asked Lama Atisha to give teaching, and Lama Atisha said, “Renounce this life and train the mind in bodhicitta.” That’s all; that is the teaching that Lama Atisha gave to this Kadampa geshe.

Afterwards, this Kadampa geshe told what Lama Atisha said to another geshe, that he requested to give teachings. The Kadampa geshe, Shang asked Lama Atisha, then after Lama Atisha gave advice, he explained to Dromtonpa what Lama Atisha had said. Then Dromtonpa explained to this Kadampa geshe, Shang Ngachu Tonba, “That’s it! I think Lama Atisha has shown you the very heart of the teaching, the very heart of the advice, he has given you the very heart of the advice, the very center, the very heart of the advice.”

Probably the Kadampa geshe Shang Ngachu Tonba thought, “Oh Lama Atisha he didn’t give me any teaching, except what he said to renounce this life and train the mind in bodhicitta.” So Dromtonpa, said, “You don’t know how to listen to the teaching. Atisha has shown you the very heart of his advice.”

Like the advice that Lama Atisha gave, one who is a practitioner, one who practices Dharma, what we should do, what we should try is exactly like the advice that is given by Lama Atisha. Renounce this life and train the mind in bodhicitta. This contains the whole advice of the lamrim, it is very rich advice.

You see, without renouncing this life, there is no way to generate bodhicitta at all; without renouncing evil thought of worldly dharma, no way, there is no place in the mind for bodhicitta. If the attachment clinging to the happiness of this life is not renounced, there is no place for bodhicitta; there is no base for bodhicitta to be generated—finding it very hard to practice moral conduct, the cause of receiving the body of the happy transmigratory being, the happiness of future life, the perfection of one’s own future life.

What makes it difficult to practice moral conduct, to practice charity, to practice purely, what makes it difficult is again the evil thought of the worldly dharma. What keeps one away from taking precepts, what makes it difficult to make vows, even though it is not a physical thing, making vow not to do an action, to not do those non-virtuous actions, not killing, not stealing, and not telling lies, even the thought, even the determination making vows. The determination is just a way of thinking. Not to take the precepts, not to take vow is just one way of thinking. To take, to make the vow or not to do is just one way of thinking, just a slightly different way of thinking. It is mental action, which is formless, which cannot be seen; it is just mind determination, just slightly different way of thinking, to take or not to take. It is not something that one has to cross a very dangerous peak, and it is not something that one has to collect many million dollars, or gold, has to go so far, has to go to another continent. It is nothing like that, just a slightly different way of thinking. Just that, but finding it so difficult even just to make one vow. Finding this so difficult, one doesn’t want to make vow not to do that particular non-virtuous action, finding it very difficult to take the attitude, to take the precepts. Then what makes it very difficult even if one has taken, what makes it very difficult to keep the precepts without degenerating, to keep purely? Again, what causes difficulty is the evil thought of worldly dharma.

If one is very friendly with the evil thought of worldly dharma, doesn’t matter whether one is in the East or West, place doesn’t make difference. One finds it always hard to keep the precepts, even if one is in the East—the difficulty is not outside, the main difficulty is in the mind, the mind makes it difficult, one’s own mind makes one’s own mind difficult, one’s own mind makes one’s own mind confused. How much one is close to the evil thought of worldly dharma, how much friendly with it, how much one is obedient to the evil thought of worldly dharma, that much one finds it difficult to keep the precepts; by shaking the hand of the evil thought of worldly dharma, having good relationship with the evil thought of worldly dharma.

Finding it very difficult in the West to keep precepts, that is the part of Dharma wisdom… the evil thought of worldly dharma is so strong, oneself, the thought of the holy Dharma and the evil thought of the worldly dharma, one is not so close to the thought of the holy Dharma, closer with the evil thought of worldly dharma; that is stronger. So that’s why when one reaches the west, finding it hard to keep precepts, the whole thing. The one who faces the evil thought of the worldly dharma, one who has renounced the evil thought of worldly dharma, for that practitioner, as I mentioned yesterday in the afternoon, no matter how much the rich and beautiful objects of desire around, no matter how much it is exposed, no matter how much it is around, for him, instead of finding attraction it is only becomes cause to vomit.

In England, there are two geshes now, one is Geshe Kelsang Gyatso. One day Lama Yeshe, I think Geshe Kelsang himself has no interest to go, but just to make happy everybody, Lama Yeshe asked him to come to make, to just accompany, so he came. I think we went in one supermarket in England, it was not the biggest one. He told me that there is nothing that he can find useful for him or for the practitioner, and he said, “When I see these things it makes me vomit, all this food, all the different kinds of food, all these things, all these stuffs.” I think people expect when Tibetan lamas come to the West, kind of they will get a big surprise, will find great attraction, because Tibet doesn’t even have matches, even matches, they didn’t try, because people come from primitive place, kind of mountain. Compared to the West, like America or England, Tibet is like a cave, compared with the material development there.

Even though it is like that, the real practitioners who are experiencing lamrim, the real practitioners, the lamas, when they go to the West it is only the cause of stronger renunciation of samsara, instead of finding attraction, the life of the people is only cause for generating compassion. What is explained in lamrim, everything is there, the newspapers and televisions, when you meet people. The whole city shows the whole lamrim teaching, something that only is path instead of finding attraction, only is path to practice, only makes to more understand how fortunate it is to meet the holy Dharma. This last one is my experience, the very last one, not the beginning ones.

I remember His Holiness the Dalai Lama, recently when he made a tour in the West, I think New York or somewhere, I don’t remember, somewhere I think where there were a lot of people, several hundred, his Holiness told the people, at the end of the lecture, I think his Holiness told the people, “I came here especially to see, to find out what the spiritual, as I heard there is very high material development, to find out especially the progression. I heard there is incredible progression in science, all these things, science, astrological, all the parts of education, I heard people say, so I came here to find out, to find out any special progression in these things. So far I did not find any special excitement, I did not find, so I hope to find within these last two weeks.”

I think stop here

Lecture 35, December 1st pm

Generate the motivation bodhicitta.

The listening subject is the teaching of the middle capable being and general path, which has two basic outlines. The second one, showing the nature of the path, which leads the practitioner to nirvana, has two outlines: the graduate reflecting on the way of circling in samsara, the all-rising of samsara; then the body of the path, actually teaching the path, which leads to nirvana.

The first one has three basic outlines. “How the disturbing unsubdued mind rises” has four basic outlines; the first one is recognizing the disturbing unsubdued mind.

The definition of anger was explained yesterday. In order to control the anger, one must reflect well the shortcomings of anger, how anger is extremely dangerous. The flame which came from stick matches is so small but it can burn a whole mountain, it can destroy, it can burn all the bushes, all the trees on the mountain, it can destroy. One small fire spark touching the wire, burning it, can destroy the whole building; it can burn the whole city. Like that, even if the anger’s so small, even if it has risen in one second, but how much danger it can cause is unbelievable. How much incredible merit there is, it gets destroyed by anger rising, even the small anger that is rising in one second, and how many eons it puts off generating the realizations of the path to enlightenment. Like this, anger is so harmful to achieve the happiness, perfection of future life, nirvana and enlightenment.

When one is in danger of anger, one should remember especially this one, the shortcomings of anger, the dangers of anger; one should remember this. When one is in danger of anger, about to rise anger, somebody is creating a situation, somebody is starting to talk, which makes you to rise anger, somebody is making preparation for your anger, so also you should make preparation from your own side, should make preparation to control the anger. If another person is making preparation to rise anger within one’s own mind, from one’s own side one should make preparation to control the anger, not to let rise anger. That is a very brave person, who is able to do like this, who is able to control, able to take care of his own mind, who is able to control his own disturbing unsubdued mind, who doesn’t let himself under the control of the disturbing unsubdued mind. That is the real hero; that is the real brave person who can control, who doesn’t let his mind be under the control of the disturbing unsubdued mind, who controls the disturbing unsubdued mind.

While the anger is rising also, even if one cannot remember the shortcomings of anger, the remedies of anger, if one cannot remember just before the anger rises, very unconscious, mind completely absorbed in that discussion, completely concentrating on whatever the other person is talking; even if your mind feels uncomfortable, starts to rise anger, completely unconscious to control the anger; even if one is unable to remember the remedies and to control the anger before the anger arises; even while the anger is rising, at least one should recognize it, and then remember the shortcomings of anger, the remedies of anger—all the meditations that are explained in the lamrim teachings and the thought training teachings—then apply those remedies.

Even if the anger is rising, even it is the time the anger is rising, not just, “Oh now the anger is rising now I am late, anger has risen before I have controlled him, now I am late, now let it rise because I’m late, so let it rise, let it go, let it rise.” How many seconds one has let anger to rise, that much it has destroyed all one’s own happiness, the perfection of future life, that much it has destroyed already; and if still one does not try to control anger, still lets it rise, lets the mind be under the control of that, then hours, minutes, days, how long one gets angry, incredible number of merits, the results, one is losing incredible number, the happiness and perfection of future life. Without talking about a thousand or one hundred eons of merit being destroyed by anger, without talking about that, even if the merit that has been accumulated in one day, or even one hour, one minute, is destroyed by anger, it is a great loss. The anger has destroyed one million merit and that is a much greater loss than having lost uncountable millions of dollars.

To create one merit, how difficult it is for one action to become virtue, even if we try it doesn’t become virtue easily, so how difficult it is. Remembering that, all those merits, which have accumulated, have been accumulated with much hardship, by putting much effort and time. Also remembering how difficult it is to accumulate even one merit, how it is incredible loss to have destroyed even one merit by anger.

There are many beggars who have accumulated much merit, who don’t have one single paisa on their body but accumulated merit; there are many beggars who are millionaires of merit. After death they get reborn in the realm of the happy transmigratory being, in the pure realms. There are many money millionaires, many millionaires having a million dollars, not having accumulated one single merit in this life, being millionaire of many million dollars—after this life being in the lower realm, having not one single paisa, just having only the bare bones.

Remembering the shortcomings of anger and how difficult it is to create even one merit, it is extremely important not to lose the merit.

When anger has arisen it changes the whole room, it makes very unhappy, the whole vibration of the room changes, kind of becomes very negative, even the room has a very negative vibration, there is no happy vibration. When anger has arisen like this, the mind becomes completely crazy, so there’s not much to think about, one’s mind is completely empty, possessed by the devil of anger.

Once it has risen, it is very dangerous, one feels careless, there is no fear, there’s no doubt, careless, to kill wife, whoever is there, own children, which one has brought up. There’s danger of one killing even the children, the friend, destroy, break the material possessions, the valuable things around. If there are cups and plates on the table, when the anger has risen, there’s not one single use for breaking them, there’s not one single benefit, the cup and plate are not the one that caused you to rise anger, it is not that one, but you see, there’s no freedom, mind completely becomes crazy by the anger. So whatever is in front one throws on floor, or breaks on the table, whatever tools, whatever things there are around, one’s own mind is very careless, then whatever one can find around, stones or sticks, knives, guns, whatever is around, whatever one can find. The mind is very careless, very uncontrolled, so there is great danger, oneself and other person to kill. We hear, we see in the television, by rising anger, the person kills his own family, so many killed, wife, so many happened who killed children, father, mother, besides outside people also. When there is incredible anger, one becomes very careless of one’s own life. If one is driving a car, then one purposely destroys another car by purposely doing accident.

Even the person is usually very beautiful, usually his body has very good color, good complexion, very smiling, very nice, speaking gently all the time, but one day when anger has risen, the person becomes very fearful looking, very terrifying looking. Usually it is very nice complexion, but when the anger is rising, even the color of skin is kind of dark, kind of like burned dark, eyes become kind of bigger, eyes become more white, become bigger, usually kind of very nice looking eyes, peaceful looking eyes, that time becomes very big, face becomes very tense. Even the manner of the hands, even when the person walks, the sound of the feet is bigger, is kind of heavier, even the person is going on the wooden floor, makes big noise. The steps are heavier and the manner of the hands are kind of very rude, hands like this, kind of putting like this to the person in front, while the anger is rising, there is no respect. At that time the whole aspect is similar to a person intoxicated by wine, like that. His mind is burned by anger, so even the aspect is like that.

The people who are born, who don’t have good complexion, who have very black color, it is explained in the teachings, who doesn’t have beautiful shape, who has very black color, it is explained in the teachings that one who has ugly shape is the result of karma, rising anger in the past life. So when the anger is rising, becomes very ugly, black, kind of very ugly, similarly karma, the result, the person is born as human being but he has very ugly body.

That time, when there is incredible anger, if one doesn’t try very hard to control it, not to let it rise, once the anger has risen, that time, even there are Dharma friends around who are giving advice, even there is a virtuous teacher saying, “Please don’t get angry, please remember patience,” even there are Dharma friends near him, while the anger is rising, it’s very difficult even to pay attention to the advice; even the advice is given, the anger becomes greater.

In Lhasa, one time, one of my gurus, the great bodhisattva, Khunu Lama Tenzin, told us, in Lhasa, there was a big fence around and inside there are many temples, which had many precious statues, which were formed not by ordinary person, by transformations. Usually people in Lhasa try to circumambulate outside the big fence, sometimes they make full prostrations, by making full prostration, they circumambulate. I think it takes much time. There was one person who was meditating, so one person who was circumambulating outside the fence asked the person who was meditating, “What are you doing?” “I am meditating on patience.” Then the person told him, “Oh, you are meditating on patience, you are meditating on patience, then you eat kaka.” Then the person who said he is meditating on patience, he said, “You eat kaka,” immediately he kind of retaliated with speech, right now he said he is meditating on patience, but when other person said, “You eat kaka,” he didn’t practice patience, like that.

There are four ways to think in regards to controlling anger, besides remembering the shortcomings of anger, how it is dangerous. Kadampa Geshe Chekawa’s meditation technique advises four different ways to think for controlling anger.

Kadampa Geshe Chengawa said, “Generally, the whole Dharma, if it is totalized, condensed, it comes in two things: renouncing giving harm to others and benefiting others.” If all Dharma is totalized it comes in two divisions. The whole Buddhadharma, all the sutra and tantra explained by the Buddha, the Tripitaka, the teachings, the Hinayana and Mahayana teachings, the whole thing is abbreviated into these two practices, these two teachings; renounce giving harm to others and benefit others.

“Renounce giving harm to others.” You see, in the Theravada teachings, Guru Shakyamuni Buddha’s advice to the beings who have lower ability, who cannot comprehend the bodhisattva’s actions, doing work for all the sentient beings, who cannot comprehend, whose mind is not receptive to the Mahayana teachings. Those who have lower capability of mind don’t fit that method, the Mahayana action, so Guru Shakyamuni Buddha advised them to renounce giving harm to others. Even if you can’t give benefit to other sentient beings, at least you should renounce giving harm to others.

The basic practice of the Mahayana teaching, the basic teaching is to benefit all the sentient beings. In the Theravada teaching what is emphasized is to not give harm to others—that’s emphasized. So Kadampa Geshe Chengawa is saying, “In order to do these two practices, renouncing giving harm to others and giving benefit to others, it is extremely important to have patience.” That is extremely important! You see, without having patience, if one does not have patience, one cannot do these two practices. The essence of Buddhadharma is renouncing giving harm to other sentient beings and giving benefit—one cannot do if one does not have patience. If one does not have patience, if somebody gives harm to oneself, right away one retaliates.

If somebody says, “Oh you’re a thief,” suddenly if somebody said, “You’re a thief,” the “I” becomes so important to one, the “I” becomes so important. Even the body becomes stronger at that time. If somebody says, “You’re a thief,” even the body can’t relax. Suddenly stand up, “When did I steal?” The person retaliates back, “When did I steal? How did you see? How did you see that I stole? Did you see? When did I steal?” By shaking the body, then if a person has moustache or beard, they move. I’m joking! The person retaliates right away. Besides not benefiting, one gives harm to other sentient beings, one can’t do the practice of renouncing harm if one doesn’t have patience. When one retaliates to other sentient beings, when there’s no renouncing harm, there’s also no giving benefit, there’s no benefiting others. So, therefore, in order to be able to continuously practice Dharma, to complete practicing Dharma, it is extremely important to have patience. The whole Dharma is involved in this too. As I already mentioned at the beginning, renouncing giving harm to others and giving benefit to others, in order to continuously practice Dharma completely, patience is of the utmost need.

According to Kadampa Geshe Chengawa’s advice, there are four different methods to practice patience, relating to the example of putting the target, receiving the arrow; then meditating on patience with loving compassion; meditating on patience by recognizing as the disciple and teacher; meditating on patience with the thought of absolute true nature, remembering the emptiness, remembering emptiness. So this is the way of meditating on patience using the example of the arrow and target.

If one did not put the target there, it cannot receive the arrow. There’s no way! Just like that, receiving harm from other sentient beings having ill-will to oneself, dislike towards oneself, having ill-will with mind. Insulting speech, scolding, hurting words, beating with body, killing oneself, badly treating oneself, all this, receiving harm with body, speech and mind in this life from other sentient beings is firstly because one has put the target—accumulated the negative karma, evil karma in the past life. If one did not accumulate the evil karma in the past life there is no way to receive harm.

Because one has put the target, collected the evil karma, in this life the harm, the arrow, will hit oneself. That evil karma was accumulated, this target is left on the consciousness, and the arrow is shot by other sentient beings and hits oneself. The whole mistake is having put the target, evil karma. It is completely one’s own mistake. The arrow that harms this life is not the fault of other sentient beings. It is never the fault of other sentient beings. Since it’s completely one’s own mistake in the first place, having put the target of the evil karma, there’s no point, no reason to get angry with other sentient beings.

As the great bodhisattva Shantideva said in the teachings of the Bodhicaryavatara, “If one did not give harm to others, nobody would give harm to oneself. In previous times, I caused harm, I harmed beings like me. Therefore, it is worthwhile for me to receive the harm given by other sentient beings.”

What the great bodhisattva Shantideva is saying is that if one hasn’t accumulated negative karma of giving harm to others in the first place, no other sentient being would give harm in this life to oneself. There’s no cause that obliges them to give harm to oneself, there’s no cause. The reason I receive harm is because I harmed others in the past. That karma has obliged them to harm me. I have created a cause—giving harm to others—so the result is receiving harm myself. Therefore, Shantideva is saying, it is worthwhile for me to receive harm from other sentient beings. Shantideva explained this logically, the whole evolution, why we receive harm from other sentient beings. As he explained, instead of rejecting the harm that other beings give us, accept it. It’s worthwhile to receive it. Think, “It is good; he’s harming me but that is very good, because I harmed him similarly like this in the past. I should have it, I should receive it.”

Also without talking about the past lives, in this life; the cause and the result, the cause that was collected previously, experiencing the result later in life. Even the harm that one gave others earlier in life, one receives the result, the retaliation, in the later life. The evil karma that one has collected giving harm to others, what one has collected in the last year—receiving the result, the harm that came from that cause, in this year. Even the evil karma of giving harm to others that is created yesterday, receiving the harm today, receiving the result, harm, today to oneself. Not only experiencing the resultant harm in another life. It can be experienced even in this life, even in this one life.

So whatever in the past, whatever in the present time, the hurting, rude words, badly treating, even with the eyes looking, the other person looking at oneself in a bad manner, like this kind of bad look, angry look, even somebody looking at oneself, with the action of body disrespectful, with speech saying hurting words, even with eyes kind of looking bad way, looking with anger, looking with jealous mind. Even a small thing like that is received, all these harms that hurt one’s own mind are received by having put the target in the past time to those sentient beings, saying rude words, badly treating, beating them, killing them with jealous mind, looking with bad eyes, disrespecting them. It came, all this resultant harm, the arrow, to the target, which one has put before, so therefore there’s nothing. Oneself alone has created the conditions to receive all this harm. The root from where all this harm comes, oneself alone created, it’s completely one’s own mistake, it’s no-one’s fault, receiving harm to oneself in this life, is no-one’s fault, only one’s own fault.

Geshe Chengawa is saying that one shouldn’t get angry at others, so, meditating on patience with compassion and love. For example, if one takes a person giving harm to somebody, whose mind is not crazy, whose mind hasn’t gone out, who has the normal mind. You see when a crazy person gives harm to people whose minds are not crazy, they don’t retaliate to that crazy person. Those whose minds are not crazy, even they’re given harm by the person whose mind is crazy, they think, “He has no freedom. He has no control over his own mind.” Without retaliating back, they think, “How pitiful he is,” in the mind, “How pitiful he is.” They have a feeling of compassion. They don’t retaliate, thinking he has no control , he is completely possessed, his mind is possessed by the spirits. Without the thought of retaliating, without doing the action of retaliating, by seeing that, by receiving harm, compassion rises, saying how pitiful he is. The thought, “What can be done? What can be done?” Instead of rising the thought of retaliating, the thought to give harm, the thought to benefit rises.

Like that example, thinking like this, “Those sentient beings who give me harm, who have dislike mind, who have ill-will, who hurt with speech, who give harm with the action of body, themselves they have no control, they are great crazy people; they are great crazy sentient beings, possessed by the extremely violent mara, the extremely violent unsubdued mind. The sentient beings themselves have no control. How pitiful they are!” generates compassion. “How pitiful they are! They have no control at all, completely gone crazy, completely overwhelmed by the mara, the extremely violent disturbing unsubdued mind.” Like this, “How pitiful they are,” generate compassion, meditate on compassion. Thinking like this, “What’s the point to give harm back? What’s the point to get angry? What’s the point in retaliating? He has completely become crazy, being possessed by the mara, the strong, extremely violent, unsubdued mind. So, what’s the use to retaliate, to get angry?” Like this, meditate on the compassion.

The Kadampa Geshe hasn’t mentioned this here particularly but, as Shantideva explained in the Bodhicaryavatara, in regards generating compassion this is very effective; very good to generate compassion, very strong to generate compassion for the sentient beings who give harm to oneself. And this is logical, it is very true. It is something that causes tears to come out automatically, thinking of the nature of this, how one obliges other sentient beings to experience suffering.

Shantideva said in the teachings, “Because my karma persuaded, I have received this harm. Therefore, didn’t I make the sentient beings become lost in the hole of the narak?”

In this life, the other sentient beings who, with body, speech and mind, harm oneself, who give harm to oneself, who have dislike mind, who have ill-will—as Shantideva says, oneself gave harm to them in the past. That karma of giving harm to them is what makes them give harm to oneself. That karma is what has obliged them to give harm to oneself. By giving harm to them, one has obliged them to accumulate negative karma. The sentient being who hasn’t accumulated that negative karma doesn’t have to experience the result, the suffering of that karma of the sentient beings giving harm to oneself.

By giving harm to them one has obliged them to accumulate the negative karma of harming back to oneself. So like this, one leads the sentient beings to experience the result of suffering by obliging them to accumulate the negative karma of harming oneself. If one did not give harm in the first place, if one did not harm sentient beings in the past, they wouldn’t create the karma of giving harm in this life. They wouldn’t experience the result; they wouldn’t experience the suffering of being born in the lower realms for eons. These sentient beings who are accumulating negative karma by giving harm to oneself, by this karma they’re reborn in the lower realms and they have the experience of suffering. Besides receiving harm oneself, even the other sentient beings, who get reborn in the lower realms, experience suffering; that is also one’s own mistake.

Who is the one throwing the other sentient beings in the lower realms—it is oneself, letting them accumulate negative karma by giving harm to oneself. That is why Shantideva, the great bodhisattva, is saying, “I have received this harm because my karma persuaded them. Therefore, didn’t I make them get lost in the hole of the naraks?”

Well then think, when somebody, with body, speech or mind, is badly treating oneself, “It’s my own fault, it’s my own mistake; there’s nothing to retaliate.” Remember, “I am the one who obliged them to accumulate negative karma, so actually I am throwing them in the lower realms.” When you think of the whole karmic evolution, by their giving harm to me, not receiving one single benefit from me, they have to go in the lower realms, experience suffering, what a pity. Generate compassion like this. Meditating on what Shantideva explained, the meaning contained in this quotation, is very effective, very powerful to control the anger.

In regards experiencing the result in this life, I tell you just one story about karma that was collected in this life, and the result experienced in this life. Actually, his name is Jampa Wangdu. We are both students of Geshe Rabten Rinpoche, the one who is now in Switzerland. He is an ascetic monk who has been living in Dharamsala for many years. When, in his early life, he was in a monastery in Tibet, he was a very naughty monk, always fighting, almost every day might be fighting with other monks. Probably not attending the classes, everyday classes, those debating things; always playing, never studying, wearing very torn robes, which have many holes and many patches; but the mind is completely kind of freaked out, not unhappy, like hippie monk.

When there’s big examinations of geshes in the college—the abbot passed away recently, one old abbot who is extremely learned, one of the far-famed learned monks, who was able to escape from Tibet, in our college, which is called Sera Je—this abbot knew that Jampa Wangdu, this monk, I think everybody knows that he is very naughty, so when there were geshe examinations, class by class gradually everybody had to debate in front of all the monks, with the geshe sitting in the center, in front of the abbots of the two different college. Each monk had to stand up, all the thousands monks are sitting around in the courtyard and each monk had to stand up and debate with the geshe. So the abbot purposely asked him to stand up and debate to the geshes, because he’s been very naughty. The abbot wanted to kind of, I think, he wanted to kind of expose, instead of beating or scolding, then kind of expose, to kind of make him feel shy when he can’t debate with the geshe.

So Jampa Wangdu stood up, he pretended as if he was a highly learned geshe. He stood up, he put his robes, he acted like he’s very learned, the high, the first class geshes. Then he debated. When he was debating, he kind of, he lied. “Before, some time ago, you said like this, you promised like this,” then he kind of debated the geshe, saying, “You said the rabbit has horns before,” then he debated. First the geshe didn’t understand what he meant, what he was talking about, then later, that geshe is a very highly learned geshe, also very famous in the Sera Je College, I think you might know, Lama Govinda’s guru Dromo Geshe Rinpoche, from the monastery I stayed at in Tibet, his reincarnation. Anyway, later that geshe knew that he was joking, that he was playing, he acted as though he’s a learned, first-class geshe, he acted like that. So he made everybody laugh, all the thousands of monks laughed, and also the abbot laughed so much, the way he debated with the geshe, so then the abbot couldn’t scold him, because he made everybody excited, he made everybody laugh.

Anyway, that’s not the main thing. Later on, I think he received the teachings called Guru Puja, which contains also the whole lamrim, from the Dalai Lama’s younger tutor, His Holiness Trijang Rinpoche. Somehow, at the time he attended that teaching, his mind was subdued, then he left the college. Anyway, then he spent much time in the Kadampa geshes’ caves, I think around a place which is called Tembo, where Lama Yeshe was born. He spent many years in those Kadampa geshes’ caves. He achieved shamatha, tranquil abiding and he lived on pills, he achieved this practice. He spent the whole day on Jorcho, what we do in the morning, every day. After he escaped to India, the rest of his life he spent in meditation, in retreat, I mean mental retreat, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t expose his body, not seeing people, not like that—mental retreat. He lived in a kind of cave under the rocks near Dharamsala.

About two years ago, he had much pain in the elbows and knees but, because he was a great practitioner of thought training, his mind was all the time extremely blissful. No doctors could help around that area, no Tibetan doctors, no one could help—one doctor made worse. Anyway, He didn’t take medicine for a long time, because he didn’t want to take medicine, even though everybody told him to take medicine, he didn’t listen, so finally His Holiness the Dalai Lama advised. He was one of the closest meditator monks to the Dalai Lama, whom he can see all the time, so His Holiness the Dalai Lama advised him to take medicine, to go to hospital, to take medicine. Then His Holiness checked up, there was a hospital called Ludhiana hospital, a very large hospital, there are many doctors, I think thirty doctors, I think they have very good facilities and by going to that hospital, he recovered. They did, I think injection or operation, something like that.

But the reason he had pain was because when he was in Tibet, without any reason, he beat one old monk with sticks. He hit the old monk with the sticks here, there and here, he hit too much, so when he was in Dharamsala, when he was having these pains, only the thought that came, he was remembering so much that he beat the monk with sticks.

So the great meditators who have great lamrim realizations, instead of experiencing the karma in the future life in the lower realms for incredible length of time, for those high realized beings, because they have very thin obscurations, the result of the karma is experienced in this life. Without need to be reborn in the lower realms, the result is quickly experienced in this life, by just having pain, like that. There are many examples like this.

Lecture 36, December 2nd am

“At any rate, I must achieve enlightenment quicker and quicker for the benefit of all the mother sentient beings. Therefore, I’m going to listen to the subject, the lamrim teaching,” which is a Mahayana teaching, which leads the fortunate one to enlightenment and which is well expounded by the great pandits, the propagators Nagarjuna and Asanga. It is profound advice. It is as if the essence of the highly realized bodhisattva Lama Atisha and Lama Tsongkhapa’s infinite knowledge was taken out. This contains all the essence of the 84,000 teachings shown by Guru Shakyamuni Buddha, without missing anything. All of this is set up for the gradual practice for one person to achieve enlightenment.

It contains four basic outlines and the last one is how to lead the disciple in the path to enlightenment by showing the actual body of this advice—that has two outlines. The last one is how to train the mind in the steps of the path to enlightenment by following the guru. That has two outlines: persuading the mind in order to take the essence with this perfect human body, and then how to take the essence with this perfect human body. The first one is persuading the mind in order to take the essence with this perfect human body, eight freedoms and ten richnesses, and the difficulty of receiving it again. This particular subject, the thing that makes us always waste the precious human body, qualified with eight freedoms and ten richnesses, which is highly meaningful, and which is difficult to find again, is the evil thought of the worldly dharmas.

So far the mind hasn’t become Dharma; the Dharma that one has been practicing did not become the path; the path did not become the cause to achieve enlightenment. These are the shortcomings of the evil thought of the worldly dharmas. Disturbed by the evil thought of worldly dharma, not one single realization has been achieved so far, even though one met Buddhadharma a long time ago, so many years ago, not one single realization is achieved, not one change happened, not one single realization of the steps of the path to enlightenment generated. Mind has been completely empty, that is also shortcomings of the evil thought of worldly dharma.

Without talking much detail, saying it’s so difficult to live in the moral conduct in the West, pointing out that the mistake is finding difficult to live in the moral conduct, the mistake of the Western material development. Western people are too much blaming the material, blaming the country, blaming the people as if one is completely pure, one does not make any mistakes, finding it difficult to practice Dharma, “They make me difficult.” Not recognizing that one is making oneself difficult, completely putting the blame outside, as if the difficulty came only from the outside, from other people.

Also, after one has left Nepal, left Dharamsala, from here, after having listened to teachings, wanting to practice Dharma strongly with a little bit of energy, working in the city, finding it kind of lonely; when one tries not to be so much concerned with this life, when one tries to practice Dharma a little bit, the surrounding people who work with oneself in the same restaurant, in the same office, are not like that, their attitudes are completely different. Their attitude is worldly concern, the evil thought of worldly dharma, what they think of is only the happiness of this life, just to prevent the suffering of this life, just to obtain happiness, just for this life. The attitude of one who is trying to practice Dharma, after coming from the East, is completely different from them, and also the actions done with that attitude are different. Even working together in the restaurant, in the office, wherever it is, actions done with that attitude are completely different. Outwardly same, but effect is not same.

When the mind becomes a little bit into Dharma, having a different attitude from them, you don’t find there is so much interest for the happiness of the work of this life. As there are different attitudes and the actions are different, one doesn’t get involved in their world. The attitude concerned only with this life, whatever actions of body, speech and mind they do are actions of anger, pride and jealous mind, actions of ill-will, actions of attachment. The surrounding people, one doesn’t find any purpose to get involved in their life, there is not much contact in regards involvement in their life, kind of doing the same thing as they do, thinking the same way as they think, not so much contact in that way. In the worldly way, not so much contact, so those people, since they have a different attitude and their actions are different, as one does not get involved in their life, they don’t find connection with oneself in the worldly way. So they don’t talk so much, don’t come around so much and one feels lonely, difficult, kind of getting depressed, frustrated. Like this, kind of difficult life, nobody is talking, nobody is coming around, no friends coming around. Of course, actually that gives more freedom to practice Dharma! To pinpoint, what I am trying to say, you feel kind of strange, strange from all the people in the city.

One thing is not having understood well. The one who really practices Dharma, one who purely practices Dharma, of course the attitude and actions are different, nothing to do with the worldly people, it has to be different, it has to be completely opposite. If it is not completely opposite from the normal people living in the country, if it is not separate, if it is not different from them—then it is not practicing Dharma. If it is the same ideas as they have, worldly concern, the actions are the same as they do, then it is not practicing Dharma, it didn’t become Dharma. The attitude of the person who practices Dharma has to be different from the normal worldly people, the way of thinking has to be different; their actions are mostly non-virtuous. One who practices Dharma, his actions, even outside looking the same, but the actions are different. What I mean is, it is virtuous because of the attitude, not having worldly concern—the point is this.

Why we feel like this, difficult, when no friends come around to talk, to play, to join, when other friends do not call anymore, we feel lonely, kind of depressed. You try to practice Dharma, try to face the evil worldly dharma but you are not so strong—weak. The evil thought of worldly dharma is so strong but one is weak. Trying to face (Rinpoche laughs) but the evil thought, the attachment is stronger. So, when someone doesn’t give any more presents, doesn’t talk anymore, doesn’t come round anymore, that time the evil thought of worldly dharma is missing its own object, attachment is missing its own object. So, as it is stronger and the remedy is not strong enough, one finds confusion. That’s how one finds confusion.

“Oh, I tried to practice Dharma, it doesn’t work, it makes me feel very depressed, lonely and this and that. No more people coming around. I feel separated.”

Actually, not having enough understanding of Dharma; the mistake is that, it came from not having enough understanding of Dharma, not having recognized well the mind problems. The remedy is not strong enough. A person who is a Dharma practitioner, it fills his whole world, which is nothing to do with the surrounding people, the worldly people who are living their own world, always developing the three poisonous minds. The person who practices Dharma is living his own world, always trying to diminish, trying to control the poisonous mind, the disturbing unsubdued minds. So it’s completely different world, it has to be like that, otherwise, if one gets involved, “Oh, now I am very unhappy, if I do like this, if I practice Dharma I am very unhappy—better to get involved with them.” One cannot practice Dharma, having same idea, only having concern for this life, how to obtain only the happiness of this life, doing only the actions of the disturbing unsubdued mind. So there is no way to be able to practice Dharma by involving in their own world. I am not talking about not doing job; “involving in the world,” the main thing is the attitude, involved in the same attitude.

As the evil thought of worldly dharma disturbs to practice moral conduct, charity, those things, that’s how it disturbs to receive the happiness and perfection of future lives. As long as one follows this, one doesn’t achieve nirvana. In order to receive nirvana, the cause of nirvana is the mind renouncing samsara; the door of the path to nirvana is the mind renouncing samsara. In order to generate the mind renouncing samsara, what is necessary is the first renunciation, which we should have, the renunciation of the happiness of this life, not clinging to the happiness of this life. This is the first renunciation, which is necessary to generate within one’s own mind. Without this renunciation, renouncing attachment, clinging to the happiness of this life, there is no way to generate mind renouncing the samsara, no way. So there is no way, even if one wishes to achieve nirvana, no way to enter the path to nirvana. That’s how the worldly concern, the evil thought of worldly dharma disturbs; even if you want to receive nirvana, this disturbs. If one follows it, it disturbs you from cutting the root of samsara; it disturbs you from liberating yourself from samsara.

How? The remedy to cut the root of samsara is realizing the meaning of selflessness, the absolute nature of the “I.” As I mentioned before, the shortcomings of craving, attachment, clinging to the happiness of this life, how strongly it obscures you from seeing the reality, the ultimate nature of the “I.” There is stronger attachment, it obscures, it is more difficult to realize, to see ultimate nature of the “I.” That’s how it makes it difficult to be free from samsara.

As long as one follows the evil thought of worldly dharma, it doesn’t let oneself achieve enlightenment. How? In order to receive enlightenment one should generate the cause of enlightenment, the principal cause of enlightenment, bodhicitta. The fundamental realization that is needed, the preliminary to bodhicitta, what is needed to generate within one’s own mind is the mind renouncing samsara. So as long as there is the eight worldly dharmas in the mind, no place for mind renouncing samsara, no place for bodhicitta, no way to achieve enlightenment. Like this is how it disturbs.

Not only that the evil thought of worldly dharma disturbs all the temporal happiness, all the future temporal happiness and ultimate happiness. Not only that, it is so harmful, it is a great disturbance even for the happiness of this life, this is the one that makes worldly concern. This attachment is the one that doesn’t allow peace in mind. Even in this life, even when one gets up in the morning, one is happy but all the rest of the day not happy. Even in the morning one’s mind is happy, not the same all the rest of the day, in all the rest of the week, in all the rest of the months. Even one morning one has a happy mind but in the evening time, mind becomes completely berserk, ridiculous; not having equal mind. Even in just one morning, the mind is up and down, before one hour the mind is so happy, person is smiling, kind of so high, kind of almost flying, the next hour completely, the whole aspect, the whole thing completely changed, completely opposite how the person was before one hour.

All this, how it happened, what makes all the time up and down, not having equal mind, not having peace in the mind, is the clinging, seeking the four desirable objects and having dislike for the four other undesirable objects, having aversion. Mind is completely dependent on the four desirable objects, completely dependent on the conditions, completely taking refuge in that. What happens is that the conditions always change, nothing is certain. As it is the nature of samsara, the conditions always change. When one meets the desirable objects, when one meets the desirable objects, one of those four, the mind is high and then, because of the change of the conditions, the mind is up and down within one hour. If there is no attachment seeking the happiness of this life, the worldly concern, one doesn’t take refuge in the four desirable objects, one doesn’t completely depend on that, one doesn’t completely rely on that, one doesn’t take complete refuge in that. So, the person who doesn’t have the evil thought of worldly dharma—seeking these four objects—for him it doesn’t make any difference whatever he receives from these four objects. The happiness of materials, receiving reputation, other people praising, these things, whether this is received or not doesn’t make any difference for his mind, whether he receives it or not.

For that person who doesn’t have the evil thought of worldly dharma, it is the same when he meets those undesirable objects, suffering, not receiving materials, the disturbing sound or bad reputation arising. For that person, he doesn’t care so much even when he meets these objects; for him there is not that much aversion to them, as there is not that much clinging to those four other objects. There is not that much aversion in those four undesirable objects, so there is no confusion in his mind.

If you check up just with the surrounding people, if you check up those who have practiced Dharma, those who are trying to practice Dharma and those who do not practice Dharma at all. One who understands the shortcomings of desire, one who is trying to face that, practicing Dharma, one who knows the nature of samsara; and the person who has no understanding of Dharma at all, who has very tight clinging to the happiness of this life, who has great concern of this life, who has very strong thought of worldly dharma; and the Dharma practitioner who hasn’t renounced yet, who hasn’t completely overcome the evil thought of worldly dharma, the remedy is weak so the life can be still up and down. The other person who has no single understanding of Dharma, who has very strong clinging, who has very strong attachment to this life, having only the thought of this life: that person’s life is more up and down.

When a person who has incredibly strong clinging, seeking the happiness of this life, meets suffering, the mind becomes that much more worried, afraid. Same thing when there is one who clings to receiving the material—that much more upset and fear arises when he doesn’t receive materials. Even just one day, there is no job, the machines are broken in the factory, there is no oil coming for production, it stops and you don’t have a job in the factory. So there is no money coming, even if it stops for one day—of course for one week, of course—even only two days.

In the morning, when you go to the office, there is no upset mind; one goes to the office, expecting the same thing every day, because of the conception of permanence, not thinking of the nature of samsara. When one comes back from the office to the house, very upset-looking face, breathing out again and again stronger, thinking while sitting on a chair, then, nervous completely breakdown, the body shaking, incredible worry and fear. So what method is left, what exists in the country? Then go to a psychologist.

Similarly, parents generally love the son more. They give more material possessions to the son, not that much to oneself. When one sees this, there is great confusion, the mind gets completely depressed and incredible anger arises towards the parents, jealous mind. The stronger the attachment to receiving materials, there is that much more pain.

Similarly, not having found a job, having that much fear, worry, depression—there is that much strong attachment in receiving money. In Switzerland, I think last year, the Tibetan people who work in the factory, I think, one week they didn’t have work, somehow, I don’t know what happened, they had to stop. Now the Tibetans who live in the West—in Tibet people lead a very relaxed life, of course they make business, but in a kind of peaceful way, kind of very relaxed, much relaxation, it’s individual work, individual choice, no kind of fixed time. But in the family where we stay in Canada, one Tibetan family, His Holiness Zong Rinpoche’s family, even at night time they go to work. They were trying to decide to leave one person at home, but finally they both leave. Rinpoche was very surprised.

The Tibetans work very hard, but the money that they earn, besides for spending on family, as much as possible they sponsor the monks in Mysore, in India, in monasteries and always they make much offerings to those in the Tantric College, to those big monasteries, which are the main places to study Dharma. They sponsor monks and all the time they make offerings to the monks, they make big statues, they do a lot of things. In each year they find time to go to the East, and then they go to the monasteries, they go to see the lamas and they sponsor teachings, whatever they can, they make much offerings—charity of attending monasteries, like that. Those who have much Dharma thought, who have much faith in Dharma, in the Triple Gem, materials they have earned, collected, they spend as much as possible, they utilize as much as possible to accumulate merit. This is kind of worthwhile thing, so not completely wasted, the life has not been completely empty, they have something to carry with them to the future life. So my story is getting longer and longer.

There was one lama in Switzerland, in the factory, there were some incarnated lamas, they were disrobed, they work in the factory, many of the Tibetan people, during that one week if they had worked, they could have earned that much money. They are losing that much money, so they were very worried, they were so much worried, and I think also Westerners were worried, not having work. But some who are Dharma practitioners were very happy during this one week, especially one lama, because he found a lot of time to do his Dharma things, Dharma practice. He said, “When I saw other people working in the same factory, they were so unhappy when I met them in the market, but I had such an incredible good time, I was so happy that one week was off from work.”

As the person has that much attachment seeking the reputation, there is that much fear at the same time, there is that much worry and fear. If one has good reputation already, there is that much fear and worry to lose the good reputation. If one doesn’t have yet the reputation, then there is that much fear and worry of not receiving it, receiving criticism. Same thing, the material objects, some antique things, as there is that much strong attachment clinging to that, when it’s lost or somebody breaks it, when it’s stolen by somebody, there is that much fear and worry. One who doesn’t cling, who doesn’t have attachment to that object, whenever it is stolen by somebody or whenever it is broken, there is no worry in the mind. Also, normally there is not that much fear and worry to lose it while one has it.

As one clings that much to the person, to the friend, to the husband—one day he has been very busy with other people, he didn’t have time to talk, time to see oneself, and that much upset, depression arises. If he doesn’t talk to oneself, as there is that much clinging, there is that much upset. So, all these problems, the depression, the aggression, all those worries, fears, all those things depend so much on how much attachment there is, so it’s like that, the result of attachment.

Having met the undesirable object, this depression, aggression, schizophrenia, upset arises. This is the result of attachment, seeking the four desirable objects. The worldly dharma, the dissatisfied mind, by examining this we can understand what makes the mind down, makes the life unhappy, how it is related with attachment, how it’s caused by attachment, by examining this we can understand. All of life’s problems, every day what we experience, it comes from the dissatisfied mind, the evil thought of worldly dharma. Some person who has lost all the material possessions, completely lost all money, then afterwards becomes completely crazy; or having lost his wife, thinking so much, then afterwards becomes completely crazy; all those caused by attachment, the dissatisfied mind. Then, nothing else to do, go to the river, go to the bridge, then jump in the river. Or put injection.

One great yogi, Shapo-wa, I think he is called Kadampa Geshe Shapo-wa, said, “The attachment seeking the happiness of this life, while it is not renounced, all the suffering rises from this; since it is not renounced, the negative karma, the suffering, bad reputation, all things come from this dissatisfied mind, the evil thought of worldly dharma. Once it is renounced, once the evil thought of worldly dharma is renounced, the beginning of happiness starts, peace starts, peace of mind starts.”

In order to overwhelm, to control the evil worldly dharma, it’s extremely important to see how all the negative karma and suffering, as the great Kadampa Geshe Shapo-wa said, the suffering, even bad reputation, all these things, how it came from this; that is very important to really see clearly, the shortcomings of the evil worldly dharma. You see, even if one has enough material possessions to last for a hundred years, for one who has a dissatisfied mind, thinking, “I don’t have enough,” this evil worldly dharma, seeking the happiness of this life, obliges one to get more, collect more material possessions. It obliges one to steal, being careless of negative karma, being careless of bad reputation, accumulating negative karma. Then he suffers after being punished at the court, and his suffering, worry, fear, being kept in the prison, all that suffering came from the evil thought of worldly dharma very clearly. All this bad reputation, “Oh, this person is imprisoned, he has stolen,” coming in all the newspapers, in television, everywhere, everybody knowing, difficult to show his face afterwards to the people. Having bad reputation—all came from the root of the dissatisfied mind, the evil thought of worldly dharma.

The same thing, terrorists; even the terrorists, who carry bombs, things like that, stealing airplanes, causing much fear to all the people, all those things, obliging to accumulate negative karma. Besides their own life in the danger, being careless of their own life, besides bad reputation, all this, they get killed, they get shot in the court—all these things came from following the dissatisfied mind.

While one has a wife, not being satisfied with her, because of the dissatisfied mind, evil thought of worldly dharma, having secret friends outside. One day she hears, she finds out, and after he comes home in the evening time when all the family is together there is a big hassle in the whole house, screaming, throwing things back and forth, fighting each other; then she leaves from home. One is left at home, and the next day one hears she is with another person—first she was unhappy, much worry and fear, then second thing she left and more depression, fear. Then third she is with another person, more jealous, mind suffering; all this confusion is created by oneself. One causes all this confusion to this wife, her unhappiness and your jealousy. Also one is creating confusion between that other couple, that husband and wife, who was your secret. Besides your own confusion, one creates confusion and disharmony among so many people.

Then also, without wish to have a child, one becomes pregnant, and after that the husband runs away, doesn’t want to take care, make the expenses—after he did what he wanted to do, he leaves. One cannot tell the parents and there is so much fear, borrowing money, making great debt, doing abortions.

All these are shortcomings of the dissatisfied mind, the evil thought of worldly dharma. So examining is important, accumulating negative karma, suffering, going through all these pains, troubles, confusions, also the bad reputation.

I think I stop here.

Lecture 37, December 2nd pm

At least listen to the teachings by generating the creative bodhicitta, thinking that I am going to listen to the commentary of the steps of the path to enlightenment, in order to receive enlightenment, for the benefit of all mother sentient beings.

The listening subject is the path of the middle capable being and general path; that has two basic outlines, the second one: showing the nature of the path, which leads to nirvana. That has two outlines: reflecting the all-rising, the evolution of samsara, and actually showing the nature of the path, which leads the practitioner to nirvana. That has three basic outlines; first one is how the delusions, the disturbing unsubdued minds rise. That has four basic outlines; first one is recognizing the disturbing unsubdued mind.

According to the Kadampa Geshe Chengawa’s advice, there are four methods to meditate on patience, in order to control the anger: meditating with the example, receiving the arrow, putting the target; then second one, meditating with love and compassion, as I explained yesterday.

When a crazy person gives harm to other persons who are not crazy, whose minds are not crazy, the people whose minds are not crazy don’t retaliate back to the crazy person, whatever the crazy person says, bad words or giving harm with body. The people whose mind is not crazy do not retaliate, they think and instead of retaliating, mind thinks: how pitiful, in order to rise compassion, how pitiful he is, like that.

Thinking like that example:
“Other sentient beings who give harm to me are great crazy people, who are possessed by the mara of very violent, disturbing unsubdued mind. So, the sentient beings themselves have no control at all, whatever is done, they give harm, something is done without choice, without freedom.” So, then thinking, “How pitiful this sentient being is,” meditating on compassion by thinking like this.

Furthermore, besides what I mentioned yesterday in the evening, by mentioning Shantideva’s quotation, oneself is the one who persuaded them to accumulate negative karma and, by persuading them to accumulate negative karma, throwing them in the lower realms, such as narak, in the deep hole of narak. It is effective to think, even though it is not mentioned directly in the Geshe Chengawa advice, it is very powerful in order to generate compassion.

Furthermore, the person who is crazy, being possessed by the spirit, that is small crazy, he is not that much harmful. It gives harm to oneself and others, and also this crazy being possessed by spirit is not something that has been from beginningless previous lifetimes and it’s not something that will continue all the time. It is only for a certain number of years, certain number of months, certain number of days, being crazy, possessed by spirit. However, it’s a short time. The harm that it gives is only this present life, one’s own and other’s body and life, that’s all; and the length of time is very short, few years, few months, few days.

More dangerous are those sentient beings whose minds are not crazy like the other one possessed by spirit, the one who has normal mind, giving harm to other sentient beings, this is greater crazy, this is much more harmful. You see, the one who has natural, normal mind, giving harm to other sentient beings, giving harm to oneself, other sentient beings, is crazier, much more harmful. This sentient being who gives harm to other sentient beings and oneself have been under the control of the disturbing unsubdued mind, the mara, extremely violent, the disturbing, unsubdued mind, from beginningless samsaric lifetimes. They have been under the control such a long time, from beginningless samsaric lifetimes. As they have been under the control of the mara, the extremely violent disturbing unsubdued mind, their body, speech and mind have been accumulating non-virtue for incredible length of time. Being careless with body, speech and mind, they have been accumulating non-virtue from beginningless samsaric lifetimes until now, carelessly. From that, they were born in the realm of the suffering transmigratory being and experienced suffering numberless times. As they are accumulating now—even now, by being under the control of the disturbing unsubdued mind, continuously accumulating non-virtue with the body, speech and mind, creating the cause to be born numberless times in the realm of the suffering transmigratory being in the future life, experiencing suffering in those realms, giving harm to me, giving harm to other sentient beings who have natural normal mind, giving harm to me, giving harm to other sentient beings, giving much more harm to themselves. So, these sentient beings are much more pitiful than other sentient beings who are crazy, being possessed by spirits.

By remembering how the sentient being who gives harm to oneself has been under the control of the disturbing unsubdued mind from beginningless previous lifetimes, accumulating negative karma by being under the control of that, then result, numberless times being born in the lower realm experiencing much suffering; even now continuously being under the control of the disturbing unsubdued mind, creating the cause to go back again to the realm of the suffering transmigratory being, suffering for incredible length of time. By remembering, by seeing all this, how they give incredible harm to themselves by giving harm to others, by seeing all this, then generating greater compassion for these sentient beings, thinking how those sentient beings are much more pitiful. So then make a conclusion: “This sentient being who gives me harm, how dare I get angry with them; I shouldn’t get angry with them.”

There is also quotation from the Bodhicaryavatara; anyway, I’m not going through that, it takes much time.

Then third one: meditating on patience by recognizing the disciple and the virtuous teacher. For example, if there is no abbot who grants the ordination, one cannot receive ordination, one cannot generate the ordination within one’s mind. If there is no virtuous teacher who explains the Dharma, there is no way to understand, no way to receive extensive understanding of Dharma. Similarly, without having the enemy who gives harm to oneself, there is no patience, no way to receive patience, no way to generate patience, no way to practice patience. The enemy, who insults, who argues, who badly treats oneself: recognizing him as the virtuous teacher who gives patience in one’s hand.

By recognizing this, by understanding this, when somebody gives harm to oneself, feel the happiness, instead of rising anger, instead of feeling unhappy, depressed, feel happy in the mind, feel happiness instead of rising the flame of anger within one’s own mind, being unhappy. Instead of that, being happy; he is giving patience, the method, the path to receive enlightenment. By remembering the kindness, recognizing this, feel happiness and then repay the kindness; meditate on the repaying. One is the disciple who received the patience and he is the virtuous teacher who gives the patience in one’s hands. By meditation like that, one shouldn’t get angry. So Geshe Chengawa says, “So, one should feel happy and meditate on the repaying; meditating on oneself as a disciple of patience, one shouldn’t get angry.” How one should feel happy, how one should remember the kindness is like that. Then one should stop rising anger by meditating on repaying the kindness.

Also in the Eight Stanzas of Thought Training, Mahayana thought training, it is said by Kadampa Geshe Langri Tangpa. “Whom I have benefited and have great hope, even when he gives terrible harm, patience to recognize the holy guru.”

What Geshe Langri Tangpa is saying is, in the past times, the person to whom one gave great help, in the past or even now, when one is giving great help even now, and having great hope to benefit to oneself in return, not expecting at all that he will give harm, not having one single expectation at all that he will give harm, not expecting one single harm from that person, in return only help, in whom one has great hope. What Geshe Langri Tangpa is saying is, of course, other sentient beings, whom one didn’t give great benefit in this life, whom one doesn’t have great hope to receive help from, of course, generally in the world, the worldly peoples, it’s recognized as the most terrible; who you have been kind to, who you gave much help, the other person is supposed to never give harm, because you gave great help for him, so he is supposed to never give any harm, only help in return. You see, in the world, the normal people, it is recognized that if somebody to whom one gave great help, gives harm to oneself, that’s the most ridiculous, shameless kind of life, as if it is not human being, out of human action, as if the other person is not human being, can’t remember how one has been kind, how one gave great help; it is recognized like kind of not having mind, the most terrible person, kind of careless, kind of shameless.

So that’s why Kadampa Geshe Langri Tangpa is saying, of course, with other sentient beings, even the sentient beings to whom one gave great help in the past, even one is giving now, whatever, having great hope to receive only help in return, then even that person… normally you see, the people in the world, when a person like this gives even a little harm, criticizes or something like that, giving even a little harm, incredible anger rises, “Oh he doesn’t remember my kindness,” the person complains, tells everybody, “Oh so much help I gave him in the past, he doesn’t remember my kindness, how dare he do like this.” The person tells everybody and also by going in front of him, that person tells him, “Don’t you remember all the help that I gave you?” then how you’ve been kind, oneself been kind, each one, “When you had such and such difficulty in life, I gave you this, I gave you clothes, I gave you food, I gave you those,” like this, with much anger, incredible anger. Because it is difficult to control, such this anger is more difficult to control than rising anger with somebody, to whom you didn’t give any help, giving harm. The other person retaliating, criticizing or giving harm is more painful because you gave much help, it’s more painful for the mind, generally, it’s like this. So Geshe Langri Tangpa is, explaining how to handle such situation, such a problem.

Then Geshe Langri Tangpa is saying, even if such person like that gives terrible harm, not just small harm, gives terrible harm, besides he has stolen all the material possessions that one has in the house, besides that and besides he criticizes, always complains, with ill will. Besides that he cut one’s limbs, besides having stolen all the money, all the material possessions, besides criticizing, always complaining all the time, with mind ill-will, with speech criticize, then also cut the limbs, like that terrible harm. Even the person gives terrible harm, just idea like that example, terrible harm—if one gets angry, if one retaliates it’s cause for samsara, it only causes samsara, it only causes to be born in the narak.

If one practices patience by recognizing oneself as disciple, he as the virtuous teacher, teaching patience, the virtuous teacher who is helping to generate the realization of patience, who gives the realization of patience—if one practices patience by recognizing this, this present life will be very happy and there will be happiness also in the future life. Practicing patience like that makes one achieve enlightenment. Other one, to rise anger, retaliating, makes one to be born in the narak. So, when one is in such a situation like this, one has to choose, enlightenment or narak. (laughter.) If there is still interest to be in the narak then let the anger rise as much as possible, (laughter) bigger then this world. Any way I am fooling—actually it’s like that. Depending which one you want, either one follows patience or follows anger.

So Geshe Langri Tangpa said the practice is to recognize as the virtuous teacher! Why to recognize as the virtuous teacher, the reason is what I have just explained, the reason. By practicing like this, one receives only profit, no harm at all, only profit, only advantages, happiness in the mind, by doing this practice. The other one, following anger, has not one single, slightest advantage, profit, only suffering, no profit, only loss.

The commentary of this, the meaning of this verse, “Practice by recognizing as virtuous teacher,” that is the enemy who gives harm to oneself, such that person who gives terrible harm to oneself, not looking at it as virtuous teacher, even though it is not virtuous teacher, but looking at it as virtuous; not like that. One who is not a virtuous teacher, who teaches patience, who helps to complete the paramita of patience within one’s mind. It’s not just thinking, “Oh, he is the virtuous teacher who completes the paramita of patience within my mind,” not just believing like that, it’s not like this, one who is not believing he is, not like that. “He is the one who gives harm, he is a virtuous teacher,” in fact, just merely believing it.

From one’s side, not merely believing it, not just saying, is completing the paramita of patience within one’s mind. Calling one who is not a virtuous teacher, or saying, “He is a virtuous teacher who completes the paramita of patience within my mind,” not like that. He is the actual virtuous teacher who completes the paramita of patience within one’s mind. As he is that, recognize it.

The problem is that one does not recognize this. He is, but one doesn’t recognize. It is the same as with the guru practice, not recognizing, not having realized [guru is] essence of Buddha. Similarly, one who is the actual virtuous teacher completing the paramita of patience within one’s mind, recognize him as the virtuous teacher who completes the paramita of patience within one’s mind. Like this, practice, meditate. You see how the enemy is extremely kind, particularly the enemy who gives harm, who has dislike mind, who has ill-will towards oneself, how he is extremely kind to oneself. You see, Buddha doesn’t have ill-will towards oneself, so Buddha is not enemy, so, there is no chance to meditate, to practice patience with Buddha. Same thing with the bodhisattva; bodhisattvas don’t have ill-will towards oneself, so he is not enemy, so there is no opportunity to practice patience with bodhisattvas. The doctor who gives medicine doesn’t have ill-will, so the doctor is not an enemy, so there is no opportunity to practice on them Friends, the friends who like oneself, they have no ill-will, they have no dislike mind towards oneself, so there is opportunity to practice patience with then.

So now, on whom we should practice patience, who is the one who gives opportunity to practice patience? Buddha is not object of our practicing patience; bodhisattvas are not objects of our practicing patience; friends who like to help one, who give only help, who don’t give harm, who love oneself’ the doctor who loves oneself, who doesn’t have ill-will; there is no opportunity to practice patience with them. The enemy, if he doesn’t have dislike mind towards oneself, if he doesn’t have ill-will towards oneself, he cannot become enemy, the person who has ill-will, who has dislike mind towards one self. If he doesn’t have ill-will, he cannot become enemy, the enemy is called ‘one who has dislike mind, one who has ill-will towards oneself,’ that is the enemy. If there is no dislike mind towards oneself, he doesn’t become an enemy.

So extremely kind, the enemy having dislike mind, ill-will towards oneself—that is extremely kind; because he is having ill-will he is enemy. One can meditate on patience on him, if he doesn’t have ill-will, the base on which the name is received, the ill-will, if he doesn’t have that there is no way to practice patience on him. So then enemy, having ill-will towards oneself, is extremely kind. Without practicing patience…the bodhisattvas’ actions, the six paramitas, are the path to enlightenment, so without completing the paramita of patience, there is no way to receive enlightenment, impossible to achieve enlightenment.

On which object one should practice patience, on which object one meditates on patience, that is no other except the enemy, except the enemy. The enemy is the only one, the enemy who has ill-will towards oneself is the only one with whom one can make progression in the practice of patience. Enemy is the only one, one who has ill-will is the only one with whom one can progress the practice of patience, so if you do not practice patience on the object, the enemy, on whom, on which object we can meditate on patience? No other object except the enemy. When the enemy who has ill-will is giving harm to oneself, if that time we do not practice patience, when we will practice patience; in that time, when he is giving harm, in that time if we do not practice patience, when we will practice patience?

The guru-buddhas explain, they give the teaching, which shows the path to enlightenment, give the teachings how to practice patience. But as they do not have ill-will, do not rise anger, they are not object, no opportunity to practice patience with them, with the enemy. One who has ill-will, as there is danger to rise anger, on this object, what I’m saying is this, you see, this enemy, one who has ill-will, by giving harm, having ill-will, giving harm towards oneself, in that way gives the opportunity to practice patience; in that way the anger gets subdued; the anger, the disturbing unsubdued mind, which disturbs to receive enlightenment, gets subdued, gets pacified. So the enemy is the real virtuous teacher, who practically, not only talking, explaining teachings, who practically helps oneself, who shows very clearly the nature of one’s own mind, how much anger there is; however, who practically helps oneself to complete the practice of patience. So he is the actual virtuous teacher who gives patience within one’s mind. He is really the virtuous teacher who gives enlightenment in one’s hand.

However, by remembering the quotation as Shantideva said, “If he benefits me as a doctor, how can I practice patience? Because of the reason that patience gets generated by depending on the extremely great hatred, because of that reason patience rises, by depending on the great thought of hatred, it is worthwhile to make offering as holy Dharma.”

What the great bodhisattva Shantideva is saying is, let’s put this way, if all the sentient beings benefit oneself as a doctor, without having ill-will, without having hatred towards oneself, no way, no way—how can I practice patience? How can I get the opportunity to practice patience? No way, the patience rises on one who has great hatred towards oneself, by the kindness of that person, by the kindness of the enemy, one receives the patience. That’s how one completes the patience, that’s how one receives enlightenment. Same thing, by depending on Buddha one receives enlightenment, by the kindness of Buddha one receives enlightenment. The teachings that are shown by Buddha, by practicing them, one receives enlightenment, that’s how Buddha gives enlightenment. How the holy Dharma leads oneself to enlightenment, by actualizing within one’s mind, that’s how the holy Dharma leads; by depending on the holy Dharma, one receives enlightenment.

Because of that reason, Buddha is recognized as very holy, precious, holy, revealing the path, making it possible to receive enlightenment. The holy Dharma is precious because by actualizing it, one receives enlightenment. So it is holy and precious. So same thing as one respects Buddha and holy Dharma, makes offerings to them, same reason, with the enemy, by practicing, as the enemy gives opportunity to practice patience, and by practicing patience one receives enlightenment, same thing. The enemy is also a precious object from whom one receives enlightenment, from whom one receives patience, from whom one receives enlightenment. So, as one respects Buddha and Dharma, one should respect also the enemy and make offering to the enemy.

Before talking about the fourth meditation, meditating on shunyata, I will just mention this. When somebody complains or badly treats oneself, that time, without thinking, “Oh he gave me harm, he said terrible things to me, how bad he is, how terrible he is” instead of, without thinking like this, by taking care of one’s own mind, “Oh he is extremely kind, oh he is extremely good, he is helping, myself alone isn’t enough powerful enough to destroy the devil, the self-cherishing thought, to pacify the disturbing unsubdued mind, the anger, the I-grasping ignorance, myself is not enough.” Like if you are fighting with somebody, concentrating on the person, the enemy, the one who harms oneself, as a helper one is fighting together with, who tries to defeat together, against other people, like that think, when somebody hurts oneself, when somebody badly treats oneself, instead of considering as the enemy, think, “He is my helper, helping me, together to destroy my self-cherishing thought, ignorance of true existence, I- grasping ignorance, the disturbing unsubdued mind, the anger. In the world, in the fighting, yourself not having enough power, depending on other people’s power to defeat, like that.

However, “the virtuous teacher, the Dharma friend, the helper who helps me to destroy, to defeat the real enemy, the inner, real enemy, the self-cherishing thought and those disturbing unsubdued minds, the ‘I’-grasping ignorance, the anger—he is my helper.” Instead of thinking “he is my enemy” instead of thinking that think of yourself and the other who harms yourself as being the same party. Then the self-cherishing thought and those disturbing unsubdued minds, anger, as the enemy. By thinking like this, “They are my helper in order to practice Dharma, helping to practice Dharma in order for me to achieve enlightenment.” Think like that.

When somebody hurts oneself, thinking, “That person is extremely good, helping me,” remembering like this, is like having taken tranquilizer medicine, which kills the pain, keeps it down, like that. When you think how the person is extremely kind, so good, whenever you think this way, without following the delusion, instead of rising dislike mind towards the person, when you think in this way, remembering his kindness like this, “He is giving me opportunity to practice patience,” instead of rising dislike mind, you like the person more: instead of rising thought not wanting to look at his face, not wanting to see the person, instead of this, from the depth of your heart you feel the kindness of the person, helping in Dharma practice. And instead of retaliating, it makes you help. As you feel the kindness from the depth of heart, from very inside, impossible to rise the thought to retaliate, only rising thought to give help, “How can I help him?” Same thing, which automatically makes to respect that person, as one feels, remembering his kindness from the heart, kind of automatically, it makes one respect the person like Buddha, like a virtuous teacher, like Buddha.

There is elaborate practice on patience, in regards to controlling the anger, explained by the great bodhisattva Shantideva in the Bodhicaryavatara; it is extremely beneficial.

Now, meditating on patience by reflecting on emptiness, shunyata.

What Geshe Chengawa said, the way to think, “Absolutely, the object of harm, the enemy who gives harm and the harm itself, are empty. Absolutely, the object of harm, oneself, the other enemy who gives harm and the harm itself are completely empty, don’t exist.”

I will go straight. It’s like now, perceiving other sentient beings, the enemy giving harm to oneself, perceiving, having vision, now having vision of other sentient beings giving harm to oneself—all these are like illusion, like dream, projection of vision, the vision of the hallucinated mind, like the vision one gets by taking LSD. Fighting with someone, somebody is cutting your body into pieces. The same as you get on LSD. Then by reflecting like this, by thinking like this, one shouldn’t get angry. It is said in the Bodhicaryavatara, “The existence that is empty, like that, what is there to receive and to lose? Nothing, what is there to like and to dislike? Nothing. What is there badly treated?”

After having woken up from a dream of the enemy, with the enemy of the dream, the enemy one has dreamt, after one woke up from the dream, one realizes it doesn’t exist by its nature. Anyway, one realizes it doesn’t exist, so one doesn’t get angry. Like that, even this present enemy who is giving harm now, it is similar to the dream; that enemy doesn’t exist absolutely. So therefore, without feeling hatred towards the enemy, mediate on patience. I’m sure you have understood very clearly what is absolutely empty, so...

However, simply, the last one, if one can think, as I told one of the times during the dedication time, if one can think like that, what is happening here, the situation what happens here, at least if one can think, “I am dreaming,” like, you see, in the dream, when you are dreaming, when you recognize that you are dreaming, when you realize you are dreaming, what you are seeing, the surrounding material objects, you realize you are dreaming. “What I’m dreaming, they are not real,” this harmful knife, those sharp things in the dreams, recognizing that they are not. The people that you see, the people who hurt, who are throwing things, who are hitting things to oneself, when you recognize, “I’m dreaming,” at the same time you know that, you feel that those things do not hurt; at the same time you feel like that, it doesn’t hurt. It doesn’t hurt and at the same time there is no fear, as one recognizes the dream.

Even if one cannot recognize what is empty—oneself, the object of harm, the person who gives harm and the harm itself—even if one cannot recognize that they are empty absolutely, in absolute truth they are empty, even one cannot recognize this; even one cannot recognize, even one cannot understand, try to recognize as a dream. In other words, completely believing, “I’m dreaming,” like that.

Then if even one can’t feel that, then the simplest way… by tomorrow what happens, enemy giving harm today, he is badly treating. However, he is harming to oneself today, by tomorrow it is only a memory, by tomorrow it is only object of memory. It is past. By tomorrow, it doesn’t exist; it is only object of memory by tomorrow, it’s only object of memory. Things that happened, at the time of death, you see, the whole life—how many friends one had, how many enemies one had, whatever one did, the whole life just becomes only object of memory, the whole thing. How much wealth one had is only object of memory, just exactly like last night’s dream, only object of memory. So at least, what one will feel in the future, how today’s situation will be perceived in the future, bring that into the present, then look at it, feel in that way. You see, how the whole life will be perceived at the death time, when it is time to leave this body, how the whole life is perceived by the person is just only as objects of memory, like last night’s dream—bring that into the present.

At least this is the way, without any mistake, this is the way to meditate, looking at things as illusory; it is similar method, looking at things as illusory, to meditate the three things. I think, that much in regards to the part of anger.

The third: Pride.

The nature of pride is, by looking at the good object and bad object, by seeing the good object and the bad object; by having wealth, material possessions, wealth or power; by having beautiful body; by living in moral conduct; by having much intelligence; by having much education—oneself having like this. When one sees others who have lower education; who have less intelligence; having degenerated, not keeping moral conduct or having degenerated the moral conduct; having ugly body, like that. By having seen these objects, the bad and the good, then it is in nature of feeling up or lifting up… filled up! Feeling kind of highness, like looking from a very high mountain, down below, feeling kind of highness, the nature of mind is kind of lifted up, filled up, like that.

In order to control the pride, the remedy that one should think, that time one should try to think, one should try to remember as much as possible all one’s own faults and mistakes. You see, if you think of the good side, then pride rises. The method to control pride is try to think, try to remember as much as possible the side of the mistakes, how deeply ignorant one is, all the subjects, all the Dharma subjects that one does not understand, that one has no understanding. Remember those things, having no single realization, not one single realization, even not the realization of the perfect human body, eight freedoms and ten richnesses, having not received this realization, mind is completely empty, instead of realization, only filled up with pride.

“There is no negative karma that I haven’t accumulated; nothing that I haven’t accumulated!” Think of all the mistakes. According to every day activities, action of body, every day, “I can’t receive enlightenment, according to this, there is no hope to receive enlightenment, there is no hope to receive nirvana, there is not even hope to receive the body of the happy transmigratory being in future life, according to my every day life’s action.” Think like that in order to control pride. Then think also, “I’m servant of all sentient beings, I’m slave, slave of all sentient beings, I belong to all sentient beings.”

Especially do the bodhicitta practice, taking other sentient beings’ sufferings and dedicating one’s own body and material possessions. In this practice you dedicate yourself, give yourself to all sentient beings. So remember also this practice: that you are already given to the sentient beings. Think, “I am the servant to all sentient beings, in order to free them from suffering and to obtain happiness for them.” Also think, with whom one gets pride, with whom one feels pride, think, “This is uncertain, not sure, maybe he is bodhisattva, maybe he is buddha, I cannot say, I cannot discriminate he is this; according to how I perceive him, I cannot say.”

I think I stop here.

Lecture 38, December 3rd am

“I must attain enlightenment for the benefit of all sentient beings, therefore I’m going to listen to the commentary of the steps of the path to enlightenment.” Please listen to the teaching’s well, by generating such as this creative bodhicitta.

In the world, also in the West, people have to form many organizations, many societies, groups—this is from this, this is for that, solve that problem, this is to solve family problems, this is to solve...what? Purpose of having, educating in psychology, forming the different organizations, I don’t know the name of those things, social? However, as long as you know, I think it’s okay.

All those are supposedly to deal with, to stop the problems caused by the evil thought of worldly dharma. In fact, the problems, which they are trying to stop, are the problems which come from, which are caused by the evil thought of the worldly dharma. They do not recognize the cause of the confusions of this life, aggression, depression, schizophrenia, all these things, they try their best, by forming more and more organizations, giving ideas what can by done, by developing more and more material, externally developing.

The cause of the whole confusion is one thing: just the attachment tightly clinging to the happiness of this life. As long as this is not changed, as long as this is kept in the heart, as long as nothing is done with this, then, how many billions of organizations are formed, similar problems come over and over, different problems come, like this. As long as from the side of the person who has the confusion, he doesn’t change, he doesn’t do anything, as long as he doesn’t recognize that the source of the whole life’s confusion is this, as long as he keeps it, takes care of this, keeps it without disturbing it, keeps the evil thought of the worldly dharma like a treasure without disturbing it or moving it, keeping it there from the beginningless previous life time. No matter how many millions and billions of organizations are formed in the country, even one stays in space, even one stays on this earth, even one stays on the mountain, in the jungle, with birds—I’m joking—in the cage, wherever one is there are always problems.

Sometimes it is believed that having aggression, depression, those things, not having freedom, it is recognized or it is believed this is from not having freedom, whatever one wishes to do, not having freedom to do it, not having done it, whatever thought arises, not having chance to do it right away: if you want to sleep, sleep; if you want to dance, dance; if you want to have sexual intercourse, have sexual intercourse; if you want to shout, shout. Whatever one wishes, whatever thought comes, not having done that. That is a kind of block; not having done whatever the thought says, whatever the thought came, not having done that is kind of block, the cause of depression or aggression, those things. Doing whatever thought comes, putting in the practice whatever thought comes, immediately putting into practice, as if it is kind of door of peace for the life; whatever the attachment says, doing that, kind of the door of the peace.

In fact, what it comes to is whatever the thought of worldly dharma wishes, says, doing that, giving freedom to that, to the evil thought of worldly dharma, the door of the peace, the door of the peace of the life. So, if you want to shout, you shout for hours, in a group, in the line, you shout for hours and hours, then of course, after several hours, one gets tired. You see, before shouting for one hour, there was not that tiredness, there was no tiredness and as there was no tiredness at the beginning before the action was done, there is not also the physical realization which comes from that, from the tiredness, there was not before. So first, in order to get that realization, physical realization you have to get tired before that, otherwise there is no way to get that realization. So in order to get tired, you shout for hours, other people can hear from miles. Anyway, afterwards, of course, you feel, because you are tired, when you stop, after that you feel kind of realization, which is nature.

By working so hard, cutting stones, the laborers, the workers, working very hard cutting stones, creating a load—when you stop the load, when you take the load off, even when you rest the load or when you put the load on something, even when you rest like this, because you are tired, you feel realization when you stop, when you put your load, rucksack, when you put it on something, you feel realization from that, or working so hard in the office, in the factory, when you came back, you feel realization.

So what’s the difference? That realization came by torturing yourself, those kinds of things are recognized as methods to free from aggression, depression, things like that. Kind of the person is freed from those things; that is a kind of method which frees the person from those. However, as long as the strong clinging, attachment clinging to the happiness of this life is there, there is no peace; there is no realization in the mind. Something is missing in the mind; something is missing all the time, in the life. No matter how much material possession you get, no matter how much money one can earn, millions, up to one million, two millions, how much you can earn, how much nice apartment one has, how much you get, there is always something missing, there is no actual peace in the mind, very inside, there is no real peace, something filled up, there is no real satisfaction. How there is no real peace in the mind, real satisfaction, is due to the evil thought of worldly dharma, so there is always pain, there is no realization in the mind.

Also, I see, by traveling in the West, what I have seen different days how incredibly easy for life to be up and down in the West, where there is very high material development. The countries where there is more material development, the life of people gets more up and down, more unstable. The people who live in primitive countries, like the Tibetans or those who don’t have even one machine, who don’t have even matches. Of course they have problems, because first of all, we are living in samsara, so of course there is problem, just having the body is a problem at the very beginning. The very first thing, they do have their own problems, but not like in the West, where the life is one minute like this, another minute like that, one hour like this, another hour like that; how to change that expression of the mind, it’s all explanation of the mind. Of course the primitive people, the people in primitive countries, do have unhappy life, and someone they feel happy there [in the West] but kind of, being so happy with small things, life is kind of easily collapsing, depresses. This they don’t have so much, I haven’t seen so much, like it is in the West. So, that has to do with the person’s mind. It is good to find out why it is like this, different, easily unbalanced life, every day.

As I mentioned yesterday morning, the whole thing, the whole answer is as I explained yesterday morning, that was the answer. Guru Shakyamuni Buddha said in the sutra teachings, “If one wishes all the happiness, if one renounces all the desire, one will achieve the sublime bliss” which means enlightenment. As long as one follows the desire, one doesn’t get satisfied. One who dispels, who stops the desire with wisdom, with Dharma wisdom, will find satisfaction. One cannot get satisfied by desire; being satisfied by wisdom is happy, one who is satisfied by Dharma wisdom is happy; the practitioner who is satisfied by wisdom, doesn’t get overwhelmed by craving. Like this, Guru Shakyamuni Buddha explains the benefit of renouncing attachment, facing the attachment with Dharma wisdom.

Also one very highly realized yogi, Drokun Tsangba Gya, one very highly realized Tibetan yogi—I have seen this—first of all I will mention what he said, very interesting teaching.

“In the door of the house of the practitioner, there is a happy person lying down, there is a happy person, peacefully lying down in that door, but the person who seeks delicious food doesn’t feel that.”

What this great yogi is saying, the door, “in the door of the house” means the mind, the practitioner’s mind, that’s what he is talking about, “there is a happy person peacefully lying down,” means in that practitioner’s mind, who is facing the attachment, there is real happiness, there is real realization, there is real peace. There is real peace, real happiness, real realization, but those people who are on the other side, worldly people, who are strongly clinging, who seek the happiness of this life, who always seek delicious food, rich clothes, rich place, comfortable place, who always seeks—that the one who has faced the attachment has the real happiness, the real peace, the real realization—doesn’t understand this, doesn’t feel this, doesn’t see this. That’s what the great yogi is saying, “The person who seeks delicious food doesn’t see this.”

Then again, “In the door of the house of the remedy, in the door of the house of the one who has the remedy, one who practices remedy, in this way, the eight worldly dharmas are lying down in that door, but those who have attachment don’t feel this.”

What he is saying is, in the mind of the person who always practices the remedy of the evil thought of the worldly dharmas, the evil thought of the worldly dharma doesn’t rise, because the person who practices the remedy all the time doesn’t let himself be overwhelmed by the evil thought of the worldly dharma. He keeps down the thought of the worldly dharma all the time, he doesn’t let it to rise and to disturb him. Like this there is great peace. But the worldly beings, those who have attachment, who don’t practice the remedies, who completely follow the evil thought of worldly dharma, who are always overwhelmed by the attachment, don’t see this, they don’t see this one who practices the remedy, keeps down, controls the evil thought of worldly dharma, doesn’t feel this.

Also he said, “In the door of the house of one who has cut off the root, there is the happy mind lying down in that door, but those who have doubt don’t feel this.”

One who has completely cut off the root of confusion, the evil thought of the worldly dharma, the “I”-grasping ignorance, in that person’s mind is the real happy mind, all the time. But those who don’t recognize the root of the delusion, the “I”-grasping ignorance, who haven’t cut off this, who haven’t cut off the evil thought of the worldly dharma, whose minds are full of expectations and doubts, fears and worries—they do not see that in the practitioner who has cut off this root, the root of the confusion, the evil thought of the worldly dharma, root of the disturbing unsubdued mind, the “I”-grasping ignorance, there is the real happy mind. They do not see that there is the real happy mind, they do not see this, they do not feel this.

Also, “In the door of the house of the person who has satisfaction, there is the real rich person lying down in that door, but the desiring ones, the dissatisfied ones do not feel this.”

What he is saying is the person, whether he has material possessions... this way is better: even (if he is) materially poor, who doesn’t have even one meal, one who is materially poor, having nothing, but having satisfaction, one who has satisfaction—this beggar, this poor beggar, one who has satisfaction, there is the richness. That person, the poor beggar, one who has satisfaction in his mind, there is the real richness, real wealth. That is very true because how much material possessions one has, perfect place, very luxurious place, how much material possessions one has, how much money one has, always thinking “I don’t have.” Not having enough, being dissatisfied and being unhappy like this; that is like even externally he has everything, but in the mind he thinks it’s not having enough, always thinking he is having little, thinking not having enough. In fact, being discontent, being dissatisfied, that’s same as the beggar. In fact, no difference between (him and) the beggar.

Even though he has enough, as long as his mind thinks he is not having enough, it’s like he doesn’t have. Then, even the beggar who doesn’t have one single external material possession, but who has satisfaction in the mind, that person has happiness; who has satisfaction, who has contented mind, there is happiness in the mind. There is peace in that mind; so that satisfaction is the real wealth, the real richness. The desirous people, the other side, the desiring people do not see that the person who has satisfaction—even he doesn’t have any external material possession but having satisfaction—is the real wealthy person, real rich person. Satisfaction is the real, best wealth, best richness, best possession, which brings peace in the mind of that person, the real realization, the real realization from the uptight, the dissatisfied mind. The ones who are dissatisfied do not feel this, they do not see this quality.

What I was going to say regarding things that I have seen, is this. I have seen this great yogi’s robes in America, I think a very, very old statue. I think one time there was, maybe kind of happened in Tibet and the statue was brought to Bhutan, one very old statue and somehow they opened it, they opened this big statue, and the robe of this great yogi was preserved. I think it was put in the statue as relics, with mantras, with other texts. Somehow one American guy, who has a center in Indiana, I think his name is Mike, I’m not sure exactly what he teaches, I think there is kind of Hindu temple, but inside all the paintings are protectors, all Buddhist paintings, normally what they paint outside the temple and monasteries, protectors, things like that. The paintings are like that. He asked to make the thangkas, then he stuck these big thangkas to the wall. So, without need to have artist in America to paint on the walls he put big huge thangkas.

So he has a whole set of this great yogi’s robes, which somehow he got from Sikkim or Bhutan. It is very amazing, his having this, it’s very old, very old, like this robe and one, which is called dongka, another, he hangs in the cupboard where he usually hangs his clothes, he hangs with... I don’t know what it is called? clothes hanger. And he has some pieces of Padmasambhava’s hair, and some other great yogi’s hairs, because it came from the same statue. So I got a tiny bit from that.

He says, he has taken pictures, sometimes, maybe when he gets depressed, he told me that sometimes he put on the great yogi’s robes and he really feels, he says that time when he wears the robes, that time he feels much, having much power. Then he holds the purba, the religious implement which is used with the method of Secret Mantra, which is used to do wrathful actions with the method of Secret Mantra. There are different kinds of the pointed ones, according to different deities, on the top of that the face of whatever is the deity and the body pointed like that. He put on the robes and then he was holding this purba in the hand and in this hand, I don’t know what it is called, dagger, maybe, then he took picture wearing the robes, holding it like this and grinning teeth. He took pictures. He says when he is wearing this, it’s really very powerful, really powerful, he says he really gets power.

It is very amazing because still it has the natural scented smell, which before the great yogi was wearing, the natural scented smell, normally we call it the smell of morality. One who lives in pure moral conduct, there is natural smell, highly realized beings, there is kind of natural smell. Still it has the previous natural scented smell existing with that. So, I asked him for one tiny piece from that robe.

This great yogi, I think when he was a shepherd looking after sheep in his early life, he always made offerings before he ate his food to his guru. One day he forgot, somehow he forgot to make an offering; he ate tsampa, after he put the tsampa in the mouth he remembered to make offering, so he took the food from the mouth and threw like this, making offering to his guru. So, even the guru is quite far from that place where he was, suddenly the guru has got in his mouth, he got the tsampa, which the yogi had made as an offering. Suddenly he got the tsampa in the mouth and then he explained to the disciples why it happened. His name is Drokun Tsangba Gyadu, one very great yogi.

Also this great yogi said like this: “If one gets beaten by the guru, it is initiation; if one receives scolding from the guru, that is wrathful mantra; if you need to remove the hindrances, that will remove the hindrances.” He advises in regards to guru practice like that.

The great pandit, one who achieved enlightenment in the brief lifetime, Aryadeva, said that “One who follows the worldly beings, who finds it very difficult to see (that one is) receiving happiness by renouncing this life, go extremely deceived.”

It means the worldly beings, who find it very difficult to see, to understand receiving happiness by renouncing this life, those people are much more foolish and will be deceived for long time. The whole point comes to having dissatisfied mind; as long as there is dissatisfied mind there is suffering, suffering even in this life, whenever; as long as there is this dissatisfaction, there is unhappiness and suffering. Whenever one receives satisfaction by stopping the dissatisfied mind, as Shapo-wa, the great yogi said, “Once the attachment seeking the happiness of this life is renounced, then the sun of happiness has risen,” as it has been their experience.

This happiness is something we will experience in the future life or later, whenever, the happiness of satisfaction, whenever we stop the dissatisfied mind, the evil thought of the worldly dharma, immediately there is the result, happiness. For instance, when the dissatisfied mind rises, besides the husband one has, to have relationship with others, to have another husband or—when the dissatisfied mind rises, expectation rises, this uncomfortable, uptight mind rises—thinking, “Oh, what’s the point to accumulate another negative karma for myself, besides what I have been collecting from past time, what’s the point to give another donation of negative, another suffering to myself.”

Then think especially about the shortcomings of samsara: nothing is definite in the relationship, nothing is definite. The relationships in samsara, nothing is definite, nothing is to be trusted. Then all those other people with whom I want to have contact, I had contact with them numberless times since beginningless past lives, I had contact. He has been my boyfriend, he has been my husband numberless times, we lived together numberless times, have gone through the problems numberless times with him, by having problems, by having confusion in the life with him, how much I cried, all the tears, if they had been piled up, if they had been collected, all the tears that I have cried by having confusion with him, with that person, if they were piled up there wouldn’t be any space left, much bigger than the ocean, by experiencing suffering with him, so what’s the point to be attached to him?

When one cuts the attachment like this, whenever one makes determination, whenever one stops this dissatisfied mind, whenever one stops it, immediately right in that minute there is great realization in the mind.

All those great yogis, the ones who have renounced this life, the practitioners equalize happiness and suffering; by renouncing the attachment they equalize happiness and suffering. Doesn’t matter, whatever happens, receiving material, not receiving material, they equalize. So, whatever happens it doesn’t shake their minds, doesn’t make any change to their minds. Even there is criticism, even there is bad reputation, or even there is good reputation, it doesn’t make any change to their minds, doesn’t make their mind up and down, it is equalized for their mind. When somebody praises or compliments or somebody criticizes, their mind is equalized by having renounced attachment, it is equalized, doesn’t make any difference, whatever happens. So wherever they go, even they go in the city or they live in the mountains in a solitude place, wherever they go, the mind is in great peace, has great satisfaction, always in great peace, like this.

Also the great yogi Chepawa said, not being attached to happiness is the best happiness. Not desiring reputation is the best reputation. Not desiring compliments, praise, is the best praise. Not being attached to material receiving is the best receiving. Of the others, the four desirable objects, no matter how much one receives, only suffering, but this one, this second one, not being attached to those four desirable objects, how much there is, greater and greater peace in the mind, closer and closer to nirvana, closer and closer to enlightenment.

That’s why in the teachings, in the great yogi Milarepa’s biography, those many teachings, it says there is great peace in the life of the person who practices Dharma, who lives the ascetic life. “Ascetic” means, not the bare body living in a cave, but rather having renounced attachment, however it looks outside, rich or having no possessions. However it looks outside, if a person has renounced attachment that is an ascetic, even if he is a millionaire. There is great happiness by practicing Dharma, there is great happiness in the life – the whole thing is this, having satisfaction, having renounced attachment, that’s what it means. So, you see, renouncing this life means renouncing the cause of suffering. It does not matter whatever material possessions one has is thrown out through the window, everything—the sleeping bag, jacket, cameras, everything one has, shoes, bags, what else, whatever he has he throws outside through the window, makes the room empty; or take all your clothes and run towards the mountain—it doesn’t mean that. In that case you have to leave the body also (laughter.)

So renounce this life means renounce the suffering, renounce suffering. First of all, practicing Dharma—practicing Dharma means renouncing this life. What it means is renouncing suffering. What it actually means, renouncing suffering, that is the greatest suffering, the dissatisfactory mind. The evil thought of worldly dharma, attachment seeking the happiness of life. Renouncing this, the greatest suffering; this is what it means, practicing Dharma, or renouncing this life.

When someone doesn’t understand the meaning of renouncing this life, or practicing Dharma, can’t put together, how the happiness rises by practicing Dharma, by renouncing this life how the happiness rises, person who does not understand the real meaning of practicing Dharma, renouncing this life can’t put together.

Normally, whatever higher teachings one practices, whatever Dharma what one practices, normally, in our life, the mind has to be oneness with Dharma. The Dharma is here, yourself is here, there is a gap, there is a space between you. In that way, even if one practices such as dzogchen or completion stage, the teachings of the Secret Mantra, however profound, whatever one practices, even if one practices Mahayana teachings—the person doesn’t become Mahayana, even the teaching what the person practices is Mahayana teachings, but the person himself is not Mahayanist. There is not much benefit to the person himself. Whatever he does becomes cause of… mind not becoming oneness with the Dharma, having a gap between, then whatever profound or higher teachings one practices doesn’t benefit, it becomes cause of samsara. So, if the eight worldly dharmas are not renounced, it is difficult even to close the door of the rebirth in the lower realms, difficult to stop the rebirth in the lower realms.

One should equalize the eight worldly dharmas in order to practice holy Dharma. There are ten Kadampa’s practices, which are called the ten innermost possessions, ten innermost treasures. The Kadampa’s ten innermost jewels, you see, advice in regards renouncing this life, in regards renouncing the evil thought of worldly dharma, the attachment; there are ten things, a method to renounce the evil thought of worldly dharma, how to renounce. It’s very, very, effective, so effective for the mind.

The ten innermost jewels: the four reliances, three vajras, being exiled, and received; ten innermost jewels, like this.

1. The first of the four reliances, the innermost of the mind, relying on Dharma. Like if somebody came from the West to Nepal, even if he is making pilgrimage, going to see the different places, the innermost of his mind is to see his girlfriend, to meet his girlfriend, the main aim, the main consideration, even though he does a lot of business, even though he does a lot of other things, but his main, his innermost, is to meet his girlfriend, his main aim of coming from the West. So, innermost of the mind, relying on Dharma.
2. Then, the innermost of the Dharma, relying on the beggar.
3. The innermost of the beggar, relying on death.
4. The innermost of the death, relying on the cave.

The first one, the innermost of the mind relying on Dharma, that is at this time the precious human body qualified with eight freedoms and ten richnesses, which are highly meaningful and difficult to find again, has been found once. This doesn’t last for a long time, it is definite to die and it is uncertain when the death will occur, however much material enjoyment, respect, material receiving, reputation one has. However much one has, they do not benefit even a little, except the holy Dharma. Therefore, I must practice Dharma, I must practice Dharma.

So, the innermost of the mind, relying on Dharma: however much material possessions and reputation there are, none of these benefits at the death time. What benefits? Only holy Dharma. That’s the main idea, the thought to practice Dharma. The thought to practice Dharma is the most important thing, among all the other thoughts, this thought to practice Dharma is the main consideration.

Second one, the innermost of the Dharma, relying on the beggar.

I think I stop here.

Lecture 39, December 3rd pm

Please listen to the teaching by generating the motivation of bodhicitta, thinking, “I must achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all the mother sentient beings. Therefore, I am going to listen to the commentary of the steps on the path to enlightenment.”

As I mentioned, when you think of the other person in relation to whom you feel pride, when you think he is lower then yourself in regards education and beauty, in regards material possessions, many ways, then, the pride, pride. That builds up pride. When you think opposite, put him higher, “Maybe he is Buddha, who knows? Maybe he is a bodhisattva. There are numberless buddhas, there are numberless buddhas just in my room. There are numberless buddhas just in front of me, except that I am unable to see them because of my heavy obscuration, the heavy, thick karmic obscuration, only because of that.” From the side of the buddhas, they are not non-existent, as I mentioned in the beginning of the course.

As I mentioned, one story of this Kadampa Geshe Chagiluha, as you remember, he was perfectly offering service to his guru. One day, as he was going down through the steps, after he cleaned his teacher’s room, as he went down one step, suddenly, he entered the path. He had received the path of merit. As there are three divisions, the concentration of continual Dharma, which is one of the levels of the division of the first path, the Mahayana path of merit. After he made one step down, he received this path and all of a sudden he saw uncountable numbers of buddhas just there, while holding the garbage in his robe. Before, he could not see because the obscurations were not purified enough. It was not that the buddhas only at that time came to that place. They were there all the time, only the obscurations were not purified before, so after continuously offering service, one day, as these obscurations were removed, as he received this path, then he saw uncountable number of buddhas, as he was going down the steps.

Just like many of the stories of those previous meditators; it is not because Guru Shakyamuni Buddha is non-existent that we don’t see Guru Shakyamuni Buddha. Unable to see Guru Shakyamuni Buddha, unable to communicate, is not because Guru Shakyamuni Buddha is non-existent, it’s only because from our side the obscurations are not purified. If you practice like them, as you gradually enter, as you gradually proceed through the different levels of path, we see more and more buddhas. While one is sitting on the same cushion, in the same room, whenever the obscurations are purified, one sees just right there, one see numberless buddhas.

As one gradually proceeds to the higher, the gradual, different levels of path, one receives teachings from hundreds of buddhas, one is able to go in hundreds of pure-fields of buddhas, one is able to manifest hundreds, thousands of bodies in millions of different forms, able to receive teachings from buddhas. So how can we judge other sentient beings’ level of mind? As they appear to oneself, how can one trust in that? How can one judge and believe in it?

Then, not seeing the emptiness of the “I” is not because of the emptiness of the “I,” the absolute nature of “I” doesn’t exist. Oneself not seeing the emptiness of “I”—the absolute nature of “I” doesn’t exist. Oneself not seeing the emptiness of the “I” is not because the emptiness of the “I,” the absolute nature of the “I” does not exist. It’s because of the hallucinated mind that one cannot see the emptiness of the “I.” Same thing, even though life is impermanent, we believe it is permanent. Even if it is definite that death will happen today, still believing that I will be living for long time. We make mistakes in our perception. We see in different ways; in the evening time if there is a piece of log, piece of tree, we see there is a person there, we believe like this. Even with very ordinary things we make mistake in our perception.

So it’s very difficult to judge. Because our obscurations are not purified, even if the people around us were actually buddha from their side, or bodhisattvas, whole body and mind completely stainless, no obscurations, having completed all realizations—from our side we cannot see because of the obscurations.

In former times there was one bhikshu, one gelong, Guru Shakyamuni Buddha’s disciple, called Lekpo Karma. Wherever Guru Shakyamuni Buddha goes, begging for alms, wherever Guru Shakyamuni Buddha goes, he goes with Guru Shakyamuni Buddha. He lived with Guru Shakyamuni Buddha, I think, for twenty-five years, something like that, offering service. But even though he was living with enlightened being, with actual Buddha, he couldn’t see Guru Shakyamuni Buddha as a buddha. He saw Guru Shakyamuni Buddha as a great liar. He didn’t see Guru Shakyamuni Buddha as pure. Even though he sees an enlightened being, he didn’t see any kind of purity. When Guru Shakyamuni Buddha goes to different cities, to different villages for alms, each time when benefactors offer food in his begging bowl, Guru Shakyamuni Buddha right away explains the karma of that, for each benefactor, each person, due to this karma, what the result will be: After long time, in a such and such a time, you will become a buddha called such and such a name, due to this karma, like that, and then temporal result, while he is circling in samsara. All the time Guru Shakyamuni Buddha predicted all the results that the person will experience due to this karma. So, this disciple of Guru Shakyamuni Lekpo Karma, all the time he sees him as a liar, he is always lying in order to get food. He never trusted him, that’s what he projected.

The teacher whom he really trusted was another Hindu guru, from those who are living with naked bodies. I think this teacher got sick and then Guru Shakyamuni Buddha predicted his reincarnation. Guru Shakyamuni Buddha advised Lekpo Karma that he should not have water and brown sugar; if he eats them and dies, after death he will be born as a preta. Guru Shakyamuni Buddha predicted that would become the cause of death. So Lekpo Karma thought, “He must be telling completely opposite thing. I am sure, if he does not take that he might die. Guru Shakyamuni Buddha must be telling a lie,” Lekpo Karma thought this. So, he asked the Hindu guru to drink water and brown sugar and he died after one week. Later, when Lekpo Karma was passing in the road he heard a noise—ka, ka, ka—on the side of the road, and it was the noise of his Hindu guru reborn as a preta. He dare not tell this to Guru Shakyamuni Buddha, so he said, “My guru passed away and was born in the god realm of the 33” (the very top of mount Meru, the realm of the desire realm gods.) He told Guru Shakyamuni that his guru was an arhat. Then, Guru Shakyamuni Buddha said, “Oh, I see, there is an arhat who gets reborn in samsara, creates the cause to be reborn in samsara.”

As you remember, if you read the biography of the great yogi, Milarepa, one Bonpo competed with Milarepa by riding on a drum to reach the top of the mountain, Mt. Kailash, first in the morning, when the sun rises. He made a song about the one called Milarepa: Before he is seen is so famous, but once seen is nothing—skinny and blue, an old naked body. That’s all he saw when he met Milarepa. He didn’t see the richness of Milarepa’s mind, the realizations. How Milarepa appears on the outside, that’s how he believes he really is—a shameless old man with a blue skinny naked body. Even he was meeting an enlightened being that’s all he saw.

There are many things like this about how people saw previous great yogis. When Marpa met Milarepa for the first time, Marpa appeared as a very simple person with dust on his face, digging, making a farm, an old man. Milarepa expected his guru Marpa to be something much more magnificent. When Milarepa approached him, Marpa asked him to plow the field, then when he went to Marpa’s house to look for him, that was Marpa!

One great yogi, Sangye Yeshe, I think, I don’t remember exactly, when he met his guru Dronbipa, actually he is the buddha called Heruka, the embodiment of Heruka—but Sangye Yeshe saw him in the field, picking up worms in the field and making soup with them in the pot, and eating that, a most evil kind of person. There are many stories like this.

So when you feel pride, to think like this is good. “Nothing is sure, there is uncertainty, maybe they are buddhas, maybe they are bodhisattvas, I cannot judge the level of their mind.”

The person who has incredible pride, even if the person is listening to the teaching, the teaching that he is hearing is very difficult to benefit that mind. The person who listens to teachings with much pride does not benefit because he will think; “Oh, I know that, I know that,” whenever he hears the subject, “I know that.” Or, “What mistake is he going to make, what mistake he is going to make?” Either, what mistake he is going to make or “I know that.” It is difficult to progress in general education, the Dharma knowledge, very difficult to progress for a person who has incredible pride. Even though he doesn’t understand, he doesn’t want to ask other people, pride makes him not to ask the other people. Pride makes him not ask the other people, because the person feels shy, shy.

As the Kadampa Geshe Langri Tangpa said in the Eight Stanzas of Thought Training, in regards controlling the pride. “With whomever one accompanies, practice recognizing oneself as the lowest of all; sincerely, from the heart, respect others as sublime, and cherish them.”

Like that, thinking, “Down below me there is no other sentient being except the water in the stream, no other sentient being down below me, only water,” like that one should think. Also whenever one sees other sentient beings having material possessions, even having received the results of good karma, having a beautiful body, like that, feel happy instead of feeling jealous, feeling pride—feel happiness within one’s mind, sentient beings having received perfections. When one see another person has greater education, understanding Dharma, having realizations, accumulating merit, think, “Usually the sentient beings are full of mistakes, but this is wonderful, this is amazing, how wonderful it is to find sentient beings who have good qualities.” One should feel happiness, like when the son becomes wealthy or highly educated the mother does not feel upset by this but is happy.

In the sutra teachings Guru Shakyamuni Buddha explains the shortcomings of pride. If one follows it, the negative karma is rebirth in the evil-gone realms, which means the three lower realms, where there is no freedom to practice Dharma. Even if one does get born as a human being, he is born as a fool or in a dark age when there are no teachings or no Buddha. One is reborn as poor and in low caste or blind, without capability, very ugly color and shape. The impressions of the delusions get thicker and thicker and one cannot receive enlightenment.

One remedy to pride is to be humble. As said by Kadampa Geshe Langri Tangpa, the verse I have just mentioned, remember the kindness of beings, like you meditate on the benefits of cherishing them. These benefits themselves are the kindness of mother sentient beings. When, during the meditation session you meditate on the kindness of mother sentient beings, one thing you think about is the benefits of cherishing others, the kindness of others—bring that into the mind at the time when you feel pride.

Also remember the present benefit you are receiving, practically, from that person to whom you feel pride. He is giving you an opportunity by showing there is pride within your mind and persuading you to control it. Think, “He is helping me in my Dharma practice, to control pride.” Then mind becomes sincere. By remembering the kindness, cherish that sentient being, then physically be humble and be respectful with speech. Be the same with all sentient beings, not only respecting Tibetan lamas, also all Injees (laughter). Whatever color they are, whatever language they speak, whatever clothes they wear, remember their kindness then cherish physically with body and respect with speech. It doesn’t harm anyone at all; it only gives happiness to the minds of others.

The fourth one is ignorance, unknowing. When you close your eyes, completely dark, you don’t see anything, completely dark. Completely becomes dark, doesn’t see any object, like that, not understanding, being ignorant of karma, the cause and result; and being ignorant in the Buddha, Dharma and Sangha, the Triple Gem, unknowing. Besides that, unable to see all the future evolution of the world, unable to see all the changes, unable to see all the past, the past times of oneself and other sentient beings, how the world has been, the past evolution, one can’t see; even just tomorrow, one’s own life, how it will be, unable to see clearly. And unable to see even the material objects; unable to understand how it is or where it is, unable to see. All this is ignorance, unknowing: the base of the disturbing unsubdued mind.

The fifth is doubt. Doubt whether there is such a thing as the noble truths, whether there is such thing as the Triple Gem or whether there is such thing as cause and result.

If one has doubt about the four noble truths, the Triple Gem, results of karma, like that, it disturbs to generate realizations. The more the doubts, the more difficult to generate the realizations of the path to enlightenment by practicing moral conduct, charity, receiving result finding the perfect human body and perfect enjoyments, receiving the result happiness. Having doubt in this, as the person has doubt the person would not practice. As he doesn’t practice, he won’t achieve the body of the happy transmigratory being. That’s how doubts about karma disturb to receive the body of the happy transmigratory being, perfection in the future life. As the person has doubt in the four noble truths, he won’t attempt to actualize the true path and the true cessation of suffering; that’s how having doubt in the four noble truths disturbs him to achieve nirvana.

Even if the person has understanding, listening and studying, if the doubts are not purified by accumulating merit, by practicing much purification; if there is a doubt continuously, then even if the person has intellectual understanding he won’t achieve the result, the happiness and perfection of the future life, receiving nirvana, these things, as the doubt itself is hindrance to follow the path.

In the beginning of the course I said it’s extremely good to have doubts, there is: one is good, one is bad; one is disturbing, one is good, depending on… in regards to not having even a doubt at all, completely believing, while there is course and result, while it is existing, while oneself is involved in that, oneself is going through that—while it is existing, completely believing it doesn’t exist, such as reincarnation, the four noble truths and the Triple Gem; while they are existing completely believing they do not exist. Depending on that, better to have doubt whether it exists or not, better to have doubt. In that case having doubt is more useful, more beneficial than not having doubt at all. By having doubt, there is a possibility.

Having doubt itself is a door. First of all, completely holding, believing there is no such thing as cause and result, four noble truths, the Triple Gem, reincarnation, at all. Then, whenever the doubt rises, “Oh may be it is not,” oneself has opened the door, the opportunity to understand. When one is completely sure, when there is not even a doubt, the door is not opened, the opportunity to understand, to discover these things, is not opened, it is completely closed; so whenever the doubt has risen, the door is opened, the door of the Dharma wisdom, the door of opportunity to practice Dharma is opened; when the doubt has risen, it’s opened. Having doubt makes one check up, it gives more questions; it makes more questions rise, to find out more, to check up more.

Then as one tries to understand more and more, as one checks the Buddhadharma more and more, it becomes more and more clear, one understands more and more, then one gradually, gradually sees the need of practice, that the attainment depends on practice. Then gradually, as one enters in the listening, understanding and the meditation practice, the doubt becomes less and less and less. Like this one gradually generates the realization of the path. So like this in the beginning having doubt is very useful, it’s very beneficial.

I have just mentioned how doubt is harmful to receive nirvana, even to receive the body of the happy transmigratory beings in the future life, those things. If one does not try to eliminate doubt… you see if one has doubt, then one should check in fact, how it is, one should check more and more, whether it really exists, whether it is really true or not, one should check up. Without just ignoring, one should check up until one finds whether it exists or not, whether it can be attained or not and, in order to attain that, what should be done, what hindrances should be purified. Without attempting this, if one keeps the doubt all the time without trying to eliminate it, it interferes to receive all those attainments, nirvana and enlightenment. No matter how much one has intellectual understanding of Dharma, it disturbs to achieve nirvana and enlightenment, to generate the realizations of the path.

These are called the Five Non-views. Again there are another five which are called wrong views. These are called five non-views and the rest are called five wrong views. One can understand as I go through, by mentioning each definition, one can understand the meaning of it.

There are five wrong views. The first one is the view of changeable. “Changeable” means the aggregates; the five aggregates are not permanent, they are impermanent, in the nature of changing. There are five aggregates. View of the changeable: changeable means the base, the five aggregates, which are in the nature of changing, so it’s called view of the changeable. Because it is in the nature of change it’s called changeable; view of the changeable, the view.

You see, the disturbing unsubdued mind, ignorance, which is called deluded wisdom, views “I” and “my,” which are merely labeled above the five aggregates, as a truly existent “I” and “my.” The view of changeable—changeable you understand; the meaning of view, “view” is the wrong view, the view of the disturbing unsubdued mind, the ignorance, which is called also the deluded wisdom. The view of this, the wrong view of this, how it is viewing; the disturbing unsubdued mind, ignorance, which views the “I” and “my,” which are merely labeled above the mere gathering, the five aggregates, as truly existent; truly existent “I” and “my.”

Such a deluded wisdom, which views like that, is the view of changeable.

When somebody admires, when somebody abuses, criticizing, normally we call it “what he did to me.” “He told me such nice things, this and that,” or “he said terrible things, he told me terrible things, this and that”—normally what we call “blowing the ego.” Not blowing? “Blowing the ego” like blowing the balloon? Blows? [inflating is suggested] Blowing is okay. Inflating, I’m not sure what is exactly inflating; some kind of filled up, but I’m not sure exactly. However, blowing like when you blow the balloon, like that the ego is blown up.

Normally what you say, just exactly like before the balloon is blown it is kind of flat, very small and flat, but once you start blowing it becomes bigger, bigger, bigger, very easily, within a few seconds it becomes very big, then it’s very dangerous, great danger. Exactly like that, when somebody says very nice things, how sweet boy you are, how you are sweet boy, sweet guy, somebody says very nice things about oneself, at that time, exactly like blowing the balloon, that time—“How good that person is, he is telling me such nice things, how good he is, how good he is,”—as he is telling, the “I” gets blown up. Suddenly it gets bigger, the more he says, it gets bigger and bigger. Similarly, another person criticizes more and more; as he criticizes heavier and heavier, the “I” gets blown, the “I” gets bigger and bigger.

Anyway, so you see, what we call ego or what we normally call “I,” which gets bigger and bigger and bigger, more and more real, more and more truly existent—that is the object of deluded wisdom, ignorance, the disturbing unsubdued mind, ignorance. That is what we have to realize is empty. That is what it is empty of; that emptiness is what we have to realize. What gets bigger and bigger, that is not the general “I,” it is not that, which is merely labeled on the base of the aggregates, it is not that. The object that gets bigger and bigger is the object of the disturbing unsubdued mind, ignorance: it doesn’t exist. That is the one which, as ignorance believes in it, is why it gets bigger and bigger and bigger, when somebody admires or when somebody criticizes.

I think I stop here.