12. Refuge

This morning I’m going to talk about taking refuge in Buddha, Dharma and Sangha, which is the way we enter the path to enlightenment. Therefore, this is an important topic.

In order to take refuge in Buddha, Dharma and Sangha we need to have cultivated a certain degree of understanding wisdom. Why is that? In order for our refuge to be strong we need a clear understanding of our reasons for taking it. The purpose of taking refuge is to produce more happiness and peace. For that to happen we have to comprehend our own reality. When we do, we can see how worthwhile refuge is. Without such comprehension, taking refuge can be the cause of misery and dissatisfaction, because at present we take refuge in objects of sense pleasure. We already take refuge, but the way we do so is mistaken. 

Refuge in Dharma

To take Buddhist refuge, we have to change our attitude from seeking materialistic sense pleasure to reliance on Dharma wisdom. In order to do this, we have to gain the wisdom that recognizes our misconception of believing miserable situations and confused reactions to be pleasure. Normally we sink all our interest and energy into this kind of thing and have neither the strength nor the confidence in that which is invisible to us: the reality of the Dharma. 

Remember what Nagarjuna said? It’s better not to have the itching than to have the pleasure of scratching.⁴⁹ When we have some kind of skin ­irritation and experience the relief of scratching it as pleasure, that’s a wrong conception. This is a perfect example of how we hold any sense pleasures we experience as true happiness, or, similarly, how we believe that the relief of pain is happiness. These are wrong conceptions; we are conceiving less suffering as pleasure and happiness but it’s suffering nonetheless. Another of our wrong conceptions is to hold impermanent phenomena as permanent.⁵⁰ In order to properly take refuge in wisdom we have to be intellectually clean clear and convinced that such mistaken beliefs are wrong conceptions. 

As you can see, we keep ourselves busy twenty-­four hours a day just thinking of this life alone: what to do, how to do it, what to do, how to get pleasure? This extreme attitude of concern for only the pleasure of this life is like a fire that burns whatever confidence we have in our inner wisdom, that burns our inspiration for taking refuge. Therefore, it’s essential that we maintain a fundamental mindfulness of the eight worldly dharmas.⁵¹ This is crucial when we beginners start to take refuge. 

Nagarjuna explained the eight worldly dharmas as four pairs of opposites: craving for material possessions and aversion to a lack of them; craving for happiness and comfort and aversion to unhappiness and discomfort; craving for a good reputation and aversion to a bad one; and craving for praise and aversion to criticism.⁵² For example, feeling happy when you get a Christmas present and unhappy if you don’t. Or feeling happy when people speak well of you and unhappy when they don’t. If we are not mindful, we’re liable to take refuge under the influence of the eight worldly dharmas. That doesn’t work. In that case our refuge will be like a balloon that floats up into the air and disappears. If someone criticizes us or sullies our reputation we get really upset and want to beat them up. That shows how incredibly we grasp at the pleasure of a good reputation. We’re so hung up on people thinking well of us that if someone says bad things to or about us, we freak out. This all stems from a lack of wisdom; not understanding the evolution of the ego trip and how that leads to our tremendous grasping at sense pleasures. It’s just as Nagarjuna said when he spoke about scratching an itch. 

If we understand our own false view, we can begin to gain control over our mind. That can eventually lead to integration, concentration and penetrative insight. The characteristic nature of the worldly dharmas is distraction. We are always distracted; therefore, it is very important to release our tremendous ambition to gain the transitory worldly pleasures we crave. 

Of course, reputation itself is not the problem. As a matter of fact, reputation comes from other people, from mother sentient beings. A good reputation, for example, comes from others speaking well of us; it comes from other people. They talk, talk, talk and perhaps we get a good reputation. However, the problem is that our preconception ego sort of accepts it, gets hung up on it and obsesses over it. That is the problem. The pleasure of having a good worldly reputation manipulates us into a suffocating trap. It’s a trip; it’s completely a trip. We feel fantastic. We see only the good aspects of it. And that’s what hooks us into the trap. 

Therefore, it is important to recognize the ridiculous, fanatical view of the up-­and-­down mind. Our small, narrow mind gets caught up in such small pleasures, thinking these tiny, transitory experiences are so big. Avoiding, abandoning and smashing this fanatical mind is the way to freedom; freedom from being manipulated again and again by our negative mind, which repeatedly forces us to react to situations this way, that way, this way, that way. We have no freedom, no choice; we just have to roll with it. We come, we go, we come, we go. Even though our big ego thinks proudly, “I’m freeeee,” we’re not. We can see through our own experience that this is true. I mean, sometimes we really don’t know what we’re doing. We have no intention, no plan; we just act. That’s our situation. 

Thus, to enter the spiritual path to enlightenment, it is so important to rid our mind of these eight worldly dharmas from which our lack of freedom arises.

Now, we do have religion in the West, but it’s really degenerating such that a significant proportion of Westerners is nonreligious. Why? Because there’s been an explosion of grasping at temporal pleasure, at transient worldly phenomena. This is the logical, scientific evidence of Western degeneration and the loss of confidence in the inner qualities of the human being, and proof of how objects of the senses have been successful in tantalizing us. As we study sense objects from all sides, we’re like, “Look at this. It’s so beautiful, so nice.” External objects are so successful and, in the meantime, our inner world shrinks and shrinks and shrinks. We’re totally brainwashed. To get away from such distractions, Tibetan meditators would leave their home and go into the mountains. That’s what the great yogi Milarepa did. 

So here we are, stuck here with our partisan, dualistic minds. “I am this, you are that; I am white, you are black; I am Eastern, you are Western; this is my family, that is yours.” We use almost anything we encounter to make ourselves more miserable. Our ego uses whatever we see as a resource to bring us down. This is our ego’s instinctive, dualistic nature. It has nothing to do with religion, nothing to do with philosophy—it’s just the characteristic nature of our dualistic ego. 

As long as we have extreme hunger for sentimental sense pleasures, any refuge we take in the light of wisdom will be very weak because our strong desire for temporal enjoyment automatically leads us into miserable situations. If, on the other hand, our attitude is one of seeking liberation or enlightenment through having recognized the complete situation of the egotistic mind, this attitude itself will lead us to peace and enlightenment. The reason why some Dharma practitioners have a weak practice is because of their attitude of sense gravitation attachment. That attitude overwhelms them and makes it difficult to practice, so their practice becomes weak.

People are fighting each other all over the world, from nations at war down to bickering couples, all because somebody didn’t get what they wanted. They didn’t get the pleasure they expected so they fight with their partner; married couples split up. It’s not that they’re liberated. That’s not the reason. It’s because they’re dissatisfied with each other; they missed out on the pleasure they wanted. Sense pleasure is their number one goal; it’s so important. A feeling for Dharma or liberation is further down the list. Maybe. Perhaps that feeling arises only in certain situations, and if the situation fails to materialize the feeling for Dharma also disappears. 

Therefore, taking refuge in Dharma wisdom is very, very important. It is the antidote to the ego conflict that comes from following the eight worldly dharmas. When we take refuge in Dharma wisdom we can deal with any problems we encounter, which is just as well, because we are problem magnets. We are open to the problems of the ten directions; problems can enter us through any of the countless pores of our body. But with Dharma wisdom we can overcome any such situation. That is the beauty of the immediate responsiveness of the Dharma.

Take, for example, my own experience of abandoning my samsaric nest and fleeing Tibet when I was twenty-­five years old. I didn’t leave because of the Dharma; I left because of Mao. Poor old Mao. Through his great kindness, I, a twenty-­five-­year-­old boy, was kicked out of Tibet. I didn’t expect the situation we found ourselves in in India. It was a completely new world. And while there were plenty of people around, I felt really alone. I’d left everybody important in my life: my father, mother, uncle, sister, teachers. The only thing that helped me cope with this new life was the Dharma. Everything pleasurable was left behind and I was out on my own. 

So that was the best lesson of my life. It really brought home that no matter how beautiful or handsome we are or how much material wealth we possess, at the time of death we have to leave everything behind, even our body. We have to go without any of this; our consciousness alone goes to the next life. At death, the only thing that helps is the light of wisdom. If there’s no wisdom light, we plunge into darkness. With Dharma understanding, we can free ourselves from any fearful situation—any situation, not just life and death. Not only can we be free, but we can also transform miserable situations into pleasurable ones. That is the beauty of wisdom. It gives us the skills we need to cope with any situation. Let’s say, for example, we put two people—one who is practicing Dharma very hard and another who has no understanding of inner human qualities—into the same miserable situation. The latter will totally go bananas. 

So, getting back to refuge, refuge in Dharma is a natural thing. It’s not some kind of fanatical spiritual trip. It’s recognizing the inner qualities that are already within each of us. We do have profound qualities; we already have the solution to our problems, if only we could see it. The Buddhist point of view is that human nature is profound. 

Think of the way that God is described in Western religions. From the Buddhist point of view, the excellent qualities of God, his totality nature, exists within all of us right now. It’s a matter of whether we use it or not, whether our ego’s cloud of preconceptions overwhelms us or not. The materialistic attitude has scant regard for human qualities. As far as the greedy are concerned, human beings are not important. Tulips are more important, more powerful, because their export brings in millions of dollars.⁵³ 

Taking refuge in Dharma strengthens our inner courage. We can see that through the practice of Dharma, we can solve our own problems. But what is Dharma? Dharma is the wisdom that understands reality and its function is to eliminate confusion, dissatisfaction and our ego’s preconceived ideas. The real Dharma is neither books nor words. It is part of our consciousness, our wisdom. It has nothing to do with temples or images, nothing to do with even the brain. The brain? Scientific minds are shocked! Anyway, the way to take refuge in Dharma is to develop confidence, but not just verbally or intellectually: “I have confidence in Dharma.” It is not words, it’s experience: a small conflict arises, we use our Dharma wisdom, the problem is solved. Through such small experiences we gradually develop confidence in Dharma. 

Don’t think that the Dharma experience is something unimaginable and strive for that. Don’t expect to space out. It’s simple: you use your Dharma wisdom to solve gross level problems; that experience builds up the feeling of confidence; that becomes true refuge. The way Buddhadharma saves or liberates you from confusion and dissatisfaction is not by the Buddha saying, “Here, take my compassion,” putting it into your stomach or someplace. That’s not how it works. Your compassion and wisdom develop from seeds that are already within you; fundamentally, compassion and wisdom are already there. 

We always talk about the three main qualities of an enlightened being: all-­embracing love and compassion, omnipresent wisdom and universal power. And as I just said, the fundamental potential of all three is already within each of us. We cannot say, “I have no compassion, I have no love, I have no comprehension, I have no power, therefore I’m worthless.” We should never think that way; we should never put ourselves down. Even now, those qualities are nascent within us. It’s simply a matter of fertilizing them through the Buddha’s teachings and our own meditation so that organically, they become stronger and more powerful. 

When we take refuge we develop the confidence that our evolving love and compassion will definitely prevent us from harming any other being, and our burgeoning wisdom will eliminate our false, ignorant projection of how things exist. That’s the way to take refuge. 

Also, when we take refuge we recognize that Shakyamuni Buddha, the present buddha, is our guru showing us the four noble truths and the totality of our own reality. We recognize him as our guru, the perfect leader to guide us into the totality of enlightenment. 

But the main thing that takes us up to enlightenment, the principal elevator, is the Dharma. However, when we take refuge in Dharma, don’t think it’s something way up in space or a light somewhere out there. No. We become the light; we illuminate the darkness of our own ego. And don’t think our prayer book is our Dharma refuge, either. 

Refuge in Sangha

Then there’s Sangha. We need the support of Sangha because our inner strength has not developed enough for us to be free from the influence of the environment or other living beings. In other words, we are not yet free of dualistic notions and Sangha can help us reach beyond them. 

Now, who is Sangha and who isn’t? The real, absolute Sangha are those who have fully developed their nondual wisdom and are on the first of the ten bodhisattva bhumis, or levels.⁵⁴ These are what I call the most professional Sangha. Unprofessional Sangha can help a little bit, but sometimes they just produce more confusion. Nevertheless, they’re also Sangha, so to some extent they’re still included in the definition of Sangha.⁵⁵

I guess most of us have to rely on Sangha, but it really depends on the needs of the individual. If the nature of your Dharma practice is of an indestructible quality, perhaps you don’t need Sangha, but if your practice is as up and down as a yo-­yo, you do. However, again, that’s according to individual experience.

When we talk about taking refuge, I’m just referring to one level of practice. Actually, we take refuge anywhere from the very beginning of the path all the way up to enlightenment. As we ascend through the different stages of realization and different states of mind, each of us takes refuge according to our own individual need. For instance, the way a first level bodhisattva takes refuge is different from the way a second level one does. Each of the ten levels has a different way of taking refuge. So taking refuge is very profound. As I said, from the beginning of the path all the way up to enlightenment, we maintain a state of consciousness that is constantly taking refuge through having unflagging confidence that practicing Dharma will eliminate our ego-­based worldly problems and elevate us to the very highest destination. By maintaining continual memory of all this we’re always taking refuge, nonstop refuge. 

We don’t need to read books to take refuge. We can go beyond books and paper. Also, we don’t need to go to a temple; we can even take refuge when we’re in the bathroom. In fact, that’s the best way: there’s less dualistic flashing in a toilet. [Ven. Marcel clarifies: Flashing, not flushing.]⁵⁶ If we have the right kind of mind, we can take refuge twenty-­four hours a day; by keeping refuge in our mind without break we are constantly taking refuge, even when we’re asleep. For example, many people have taken refuge in Dharma wisdom while having a nightmare, abating the bad dream without even waking. 

Now, the object in which we take refuge needs to be profound. It can’t be this tulip, for example: “Please, tulip, release me from my dissatisfaction, release me from my ego, release me from the dualistic mind.” It can’t do that; tulips are not worthy objects of refuge. Our problems are too big for tulips to solve. The object in which we take refuge needs to be beyond limitation. The sun, the moon, stars and hungry ghosts are also not appropriate objects of refuge. They cannot solve our problems. Our problem is limitation—limited objects cannot lead us beyond it. 

Also, whenever we take refuge, there’s always benefit. It gives us the inner courage that we can do anything; whatever the situation, we can do something. If we really take refuge, there’s no way we can destroy ourselves by, for example, committing suicide. Those who kill themselves don’t understand their own nuclear life energy. With refuge, we respect our life; we know how precious it is and use it in the most beneficial way possible. Normally people treat their life as a trash can, contaminating it by throwing all kinds of garbage into it. That makes life very difficult. 

Conscious energy is much, much greater and more profound than physical energy. Furthermore, the energy of our physical emanation manifests from the mind. 

With respect to the way we live our life and deal with problems, we need to recognize that if we don’t curb our repeated, habitual means of reacting to and handling things, our problems will be endless. We react in the same way to the same situations life after life after life. It’s important to know that. You can see how even in this life you react to things ceaselessly, and this garbage energy builds up and continues into your future lives after you die. That’s how samsara becomes endless. Your confusion reacts again and again and again. Nevertheless, you should think, “I’m not the only one to whom this is happening. Most other living beings are in the same situation and also end up experiencing endless misery and problems.” Contemplating that, generate great compassion for all sentient beings.

The Mahayana way of taking refuge is based on concern for the suffering of others, not just our own. Of course, first we have to have concern for our own situation—how our negative energy arises from our ego—but then we also need to realize that many other living beings are in the same predicament and with great compassion take refuge for their sake. That’s a much broader way of taking refuge than just doing it for ourselves. Concern for “me, me, me” is an old trip, not a new one. 

Meditation

OK, so next I’d like you to meditate. Start by focusing on your breath for a while, then move to mindfulness of mind,⁵⁷ where you meditate on your consciousness. The reason we do this is to stop our mind from reacting to everything all the time, to put an end to its uncontrolled rolling, rolling, rolling, to cut its nonstop conversation. That is our problem. We have to learn how to stop the reactionary, dualistic, irritable mind. 

But we can’t stop it by force. You can’t stab it with a knife. The Buddha’s way of stopping that mind is peaceful—generate compassion and let go; touch your mind’s nature as it is. Stop adding hundreds of flavors to things; it only confuses your tongue. When you stop your reactionary concepts, your consciousness becomes a clean-­clear ocean that can reflect universal reality. You see better, you comprehend better, you understand better, you stop blocking. Otherwise, one dualistic mind completely blocks everything else; nothing else has room. That is the point.

Whatever thoughts arise, even negative ones, instead of starting an internal conversation, “That-­this, that-­this,” and rolling with your negative mind, open your mindful wisdom eye and just watch. Your mind is naturally clear. In other words, when your negative mind arises, instead of engaging in “what color, what form, how nice”—you know, your normal inner conversation—just watch the essence of your negative mind. As you do, it will disappear into clarity. That is the way to stop the negative mind. Even polluted minds are clean clear in nature. Just be natural; don’t create fantasies, that’s all. 

When you meditate on your consciousness, it’s enough to just be aware; your mind is mindfulness. It’s enough to just have some mindfulness, to contemplate the energy of thought, the memory of thought. That’s good enough. Be satisfied with that. Don’t think, “I’m a meditator, I’m meditating, I’m taking a meditation course; after this course I hope I’ll be enlightened; I’ll help my mother, father, sister, brother, otherwise it won’t be so good.” Don’t engage in that kind of dualistic conversation. 

Mindfulness is like, you’re aware, but you don’t think, “That-­this, this is so nice, how wonderful, blah, blah, blah.” You’re aware, mindful of what’s going on, but you don’t engage in internal conversation. I’m not sure if that’s clear. For example, I’m walking along the road with a Dutch friend and I say, “How’s Holland these days? How are the tulips this year? How many do they grow?” Now, while I’m walking, I’m aware of the road, I’m aware of where I’m going, but at the same time I’m engaged in intensive conversation with my companion. I’m aware of the road but I’m not having an internal conversation about it: “Hmm, this road is beautiful, this road is rough,” and so forth. I don’t talk to myself about the road. The conversation is about tulips. Aware means you know what’s going on, but you don’t make mundane conversation about it. Meditate like that. 

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Notes

49. "If you scratch an itch, it feels good, 
but it feels even better to have no itch at all.
So too, one is happy to have fulfilled worldly desires, 
but there is greater happiness in having no desire at all."
—Nagarjuna’s Precious Garland, 2:68. [Return to text]

50. Lama Tsongkhapa pointed out four errors that impede our taking full advantage of our life: conceiving (1) the impure to be pure, (2) suffering to be happiness, (3) the impermanent to be permanent and (4) the selfless to have a self. The Great Treatise, Vol. 1, p. 145. [Return to text]

51. See How to Practice Dharma: Teachings on the Eight Worldly Dharmas. [Return to text]

52. "The eight worldly concerns are: gain and loss,
pleasure and pain, praise and blame, fame and disrepute.
The knower of the world says you should be indifferent
to them and not let them occupy your mind."
—Nagarjuna’s Advice for Buddhists: An Explanation of Letter to a Friend, 
v. 29, pp. 135–37. [Return to text]

53. Remember, we’re in Holland. There’ll be more tulip references. [Return to text]

54. See Meditation on Emptiness, pp. 98–109. [Return to text]

55. Relative Sangha: ordinary monks and nuns. In general, Lama used the word “professional” to denote those who were the most accomplished, the most expert, in their field. So here Lama is using it to refer to the arya, or absolute, Sangha—those who have fully realized emptiness and have attained liberation from cyclic existence, samsara. And he is using “unprofessional” to refer to those ordinary monks and nuns who are still in samsara. See Liberation in the Palm of Your Hand, p. 356. [Return to text]

56. See note 47. [Return to text]

57. One of the four foundations of mindfulness: mindfulness of body, feeling, mind and phenomena. [Return to text]