Obstacles to Guru Devotion

My very dear one,
Please continue with the prostrations by reciting the names of the Thirty-five Buddhas, and whatever number of prostrations you can do, please continue.

If you have done Vajrayogini retreat, Yamantaka retreat, or any Highest Yoga Tantra retreat with a fire puja (where you completed the number of mantras, etc.), then it is important that you do self-initiation, the long or short one. If you can do the short one every day, that is best, otherwise once a week or once a month. Try that, it is very good. In this way, you purify negative karma and also broken pratimoksha, bodhisattva and tantric vows, especially bodhisattva vows. This purifies the negative karma.

If you can, try to finish the number of prostrations I suggested; that would be very good. If you can, do more. Even bodhisattvas who have very high realizations still do prostrations, so for us, who still have delusions, there is no question that we have to do them. 300,000 is nothing if you think of all the negative karma that we have collected during beginningless rebirths, which has not been purified and not yet experienced. 300,000 is nothing, and bodhisattvas often do seven, eight or nine million, even a zillion. If they can, they do more.

When bad thoughts come, think the lama is Buddha, Chenrezig, an enlightened being, because enlightened beings do exist. There are so many numberless buddhas, including Guru Shakyamuni Buddha, and numberless beings exist who have completed the path. Even now in this world there are many people who have experiences. Immediately try to think that all of this has happened because of the guru, because of the power of actually practicing guru yoga.

With much love and prayers...

It is good that you haven’t said anything to others who are close to these lamas, as to have mentioned this to others would have been like a terrorist act, complete suicide, destroying yourself and others. It would have disturbed others’ minds in relation to their teacher, which would have been very heavy negative karma for all involved, causing a lot of destruction, just like a terrorist bomb.

I once went to translate for a group of Western students wanting to receive an oral transmission from the Panchen Lama in Tibet. At that time, I hadn’t yet decided whether or not to take the Panchen Lama as one of my teachers, as there seems to have been some politics involved with respect to the Panchen Lama and the Dalai Lama. If one actually receives the oral transmission, one must thenceforth regard the person giving it as one’s guru. I got all the way to the point of making the mandala offering—the last preliminary before the teacher would begin to offer the transmission—and then suddenly realized that, regardless of the politics, they are one. So I took the Panchen Lama as my teacher. There is no need to focus on politics.

In the Guru Puja, the merit field comes from the primordial mind. It is all one, all a manifestation of one’s own mind of indivisible bliss and voidness. All the lamas are the same. They are all one.

Further, to see the lama as having mistakes should only bring to mind the kindness of that lama. The moment one sees mistakes (Rinpoche snapped his fingers), in that same moment, one should think “so kind.” Why? Because Shakyamuni Buddha said that during this degenerate time, this is how he would guide sentient beings, by taking an ordinary form. “Ordinary form” means having mistakes, so seeing the lama as having mistakes should only remind one of the kindness of the lama, who is taking an ordinary form in order to benefit one’s mind.

Heruka with consort is a form that is taken to benefit the minds of sentient beings. The guru having mistakes is the same. It is just another form that the primordial enlightened mind is taking to benefit sentient beings.

One can only see the guru according to the level of one’s own mind. We are so lucky that we are able to relate to the guru in human form, even with mistakes, and not as an animal that we can’t even talk to. Just being able to relate to the guru in human form, we are so lucky, so unbelievably fortunate. So, again, seeing the guru as having mistakes should only bring to mind how incredibly lucky we are that the guru is in human form and not an animal.

You must make a strong determination to have a new mind toward this person from now on. You must make a complete determination to see that person as a buddha, all the time. Making yourself see the person as a buddha is extremely important for practicing guru devotion with that person.

It is also very important in everyday life not to expect a pure view to come from the side of other people. If you have that expectation, when it doesn’t happen, your mind gets into trouble. So, in everyday life, you must always remain aware that the pure view must come from your own mind. From your own side, you must try to generate this view. In this way, it will happen that you see that person as being as pure as a buddha. This is very good.

This is a question of transforming the mind. For example, if you look at yourself as a buddha, visualizing that you are transformed into a deity and placing yourself in the mandala, then that will happen immediately when you want it to, without effort.

This happens when you attain the realization of the gross generation stage of the highest tantra. Similarly, during the subtle generation stage, you see yourself as a deity in a mandala that is very, very tiny, small enough to fit inside a drop the size of a mustard seed. This pure appearance comes from your own mind training, from being able to see yourself this way. Later, during the completion stage, your subtle-wind mind transforms into the deity in the mandala. Then you are able to do many practices with that. At that point, you can actually travel. Finally, when you become enlightened, no impurity appears to you at all. Your senses perceive only infinitely pure appearances.

All this comes from your own mind training. Seeing the guru in an ordinary form and making mistakes came from your own obscured, ordinary mind. You should always be aware also that seeing the guru as buddha has to come from your own mind.

Once you understand this, you still need to stabilize the thought of seeing the guru as a buddha. This thought becomes stabilized in your mind by using quotations and logic and your own personal experience with the guru. You should also read subjects on guru devotion from Liberation in the Palm of Your Hand.

I advise you to confess to whichever gurus with whom you feel you have made mistakes. Specifically, you should make a verbal confession to the guru toward whom you had negative thoughts.

Then the student asked for advice on a different topic. She said that when she thought about Dharma or listened to teachings, some very heavy thoughts came into her head, making her sleepy, unable to concentrate, and distracted. She thought maybe this was due to the negative thoughts she had toward the guru.

This heavy thought that makes the mind sleepy and unclear could be due to negative karma resulting from having abandoned Dharma in the past or having polluted holy objects or holy beings.

Here I will suggest some solutions. You should confess to the gurus who you thought made mistakes. In particular, you should confess verbally to the one toward whom you had negative thoughts, and you should practice offering a bath to the buddhas, to the merit field.

This actual practice involves washing and offering water to clean the guru’s holy body, to wash it yourself, massage it, ornament it, offer robes to it, and dress the guru. You do all this directly with your own hands. If there is no opportunity to do it directly, you can visualize this practice of offering a bath. I advise you to perform this practice, called trutor, 800 times.

Trutor is a particular practice for purifying pollutions, such as these kinds of obstacles to reading Dharma books or listening to teachings. Being unable to understand, falling asleep, or being unable to follow Dharma teachings are not external pollutions. They are inner pollution, mental pollution. Trutor is very good for similar sorts of pollution, such as from selling statues, scriptures, or other holy objects, and buying food with that money, and for many other types of pollutions.

I also suggest you do a Compassion Buddha retreat.

You are asking about a very urgent and important practice, in other words, a protection for developing one’s mind on the path to enlightenment.

It is said in many tantric teachings—such as the Kalachakra and Guhyasamaja—that even if one has accumulated the five uninterrupted negative karmas, one can still achieve the sublime vehicle in this life, in particular the Maha-anuttara path, which is the most skillful for granting enlightenment in a brief lifetime in degenerate times. But those who criticize the guru from the heart will not achieve this, even if they practice the sublime vehicle.

In Lama Tsongkhapa’s lamrim, it is clearly mentioned that even for the thought that the virtuous friend is ordinary to arise is a cause to lose realizations. This means also that it becomes an obstacle to developing the mind on the path.

The very important thing is to analyze and check as much as possible before making Dharma contact. With the recognition of guru and disciple, since the Dharma contact is established, then there is no going back. One has to have a new relationship. It is another world, looking at that person with a new mind, a pure mind.

It is said by Pabongka Dechen Nyingpo, the great enlightened being, the Heruka, that if one is able to stop all thoughts of mistakes and look only at good qualities, seeing the guru only as Buddha, then one can achieve enlightenment in this life.

This is not only for this life. Generally, one cannot get enlightened while seeing mistakes in the virtuous friend. But, with the realization of seeing all buddhas as the guru and all gurus as Buddha, one can. This is said in all four Tibetan Mahayana sects, in both sutra and tantra.

Making mistakes, allowing heresy, anger, or criticism to arise, giving up the virtuous friend: these become the cause for one not to find a guru in future lives. It is said in the Essence of Nectar that it causes one to be unable to hear the sound of the holy Dharma, not to mention being able to find a virtuous friend, and that one becomes impoverished in terms of a virtuous friend in all one’s lifetimes.

This is the last outline of the eight shortcomings of incorrectly devoting to a virtuous friend.

I often mention this quotation by the Fifth Dalai Lama:

When one’s own mistakes appear to one’s own hallucinated mind in the actions of the guru, one must realize that this is one’s own mistake and abandon it like poison.

This means that we must abandon the belief that there is a mistake in the actions of the virtuous friend.

With this mindfulness, look at that person as Buddha, one who has eliminated all mistakes and has all good qualities. Then, if the guru asks you to do something, and it’s something that you don’t have the capacity to do now, if your mind hasn’t reached that level, then with this pure thought that I mentioned before, with this mindfulness, one respectfully explains to the guru that one is incapable of doing this, and in this way one tries to get the guru to excuse one from doing it.

This is what is mentioned in the Fifty Verses of Guru Devotion and in the Vinaya. If the guru says to do something that is not Dharma, one can ask permission not to do it. It doesn’t say to have negative thoughts or to criticize him. This is how to deal with the problem without it becoming an obstacle to developing one’s mind on the path.

Of course, as His Holiness the Dalai Lama mentions all the time, when a special guru and special disciple meet, then every single thing the guru says is to be done, like Tilopa and Naropa, or Marpa and Milarepa, and so forth.

The main thing here is to be skillful and try not to hurt the holy mind of the guru. Hurting the mind of the guru is the greatest obstacle to developing one’s own mind on the path to enlightenment.

If you have made a mistake toward the guru then you must confess from the heart. This way, you get the profit of lightening and purifying the negative karma. Of course, there are many other practices, such as Samayavajra and self-initiations, but one very good thing is to do some service, some practice that pleases the holy mind of the virtuous friend.

You mentioned sincerity, but in my view this sincerity is without wisdom. Sincerity is beneficial to others when it has wisdom and is performed with compassion. If there is wisdom, usually there should also be compassion, I think, which means a very wide, encompassing wisdom.

For example, if someone comes along who wants to kill a particular person, and he asks you where that person has gone, and you think you should be sincere, without wisdom—which also should include compassion—then you will tell him where the person went, instead of saying you don’t know, which would save the person’s life.

The other thing is, we can always find mistakes. Also, we think it is a question of whether it is a big mistake or a small mistake. There will always be something —too much anger, too much miserliness, too much pride, a partial mind, etc.

If you look for mistakes, you will see mistakes.

Thank you very much for your kind letter.
According to my observations, if you can, do these practices:

• 200,000 Vajrasattva mantras
• 100,000 prostrations to the Thirty-five Buddhas

If I say to do them based on bodhicitta, that may be too nice for you. So I will say to do them with a strong thought of impermanence and death. If I say “bodhicitta,” maybe it will be too comfortable.

My very dear one,
Thank you very much for your kind letter.

You are experiencing much pain and hardship, and that experience becomes the greatest purification for you. That pain purifies so many eons of the most intense suffering in the hell realms, preta realms, animal realms, or human realms. Even though it was unbearable, it was only for a short time, and you have purified countless eons, which now you don’t have to suffer. That is what you achieve. All the merit and the pain that you felt purifies obstacles to achieving enlightenment.

In regard to your guru devotion, you completely dedicated yourself to your guru. Your motivation was totally pure, so if you died with that motivation, it would be great. This is what bodhisattvas do. There are bodhisattvas who take different forms to benefit other sentient beings, making a connection with them, to purify them and in this way bring them to enlightenment and stop them from creating heavy negative karma.

It is said in the Fifty Verses of Guru Devotion:

Do whatever pleases the guru and abandon whatever displeases the guru.

Think that whatever the guru does, this is a special method to purify me, to end all my heavy, negative karma from the past, and all the obstacles to my realizations. This is for my success, for the highest enlightenment, to liberate me from samsara, and for the happiness of all my future lives.

There is a story about my attendant Roger, when he was working very hard in Kathmandu. He was very poor and sick, and every night he had to walk back to Kopan Monastery. One time he collapsed while he was crossing the fields on his way up to Kopan. He was extremely sick and also completely exhausted, and just could not get up, so he tried to use psychology to make himself get up. He imagined that he was in a stadium and there were lots of people watching him, and everyone was shouting, saying in one voice, “You can do it! Get up!” Everyone was saying this and it gave him courage, and he was able to get up and walk up to Kopan. Even though physically he was unable to, by using psychology he was able to get the strength to make it there.

There is also the story of how Tilopa treated Naropa—there were twelve great hardships and twelve small hardships that Naropa had to perform. Tilopa asked Naropa to jump off the roof, and there was a hole down below. Naropa jumped and almost died, but then Tilopa came and blessed him, and he was instantly healed. Then Tilopa told Naropa to jump into a fire. Naropa did it immediately and almost died, and Tilopa came and blessed him, and he was instantly healed. Then another time there was a wedding going on. The wife and husband were going by in a carriage, and Tilopa asked Naropa to run up to the bride and touch her. Naropa immediately did it without hesitation, and the people beat him up. Again, he almost died, but Tilopa came and blessed him, and healed him immediately.

Then Tilopa asked Naropa to go to the house of someone who was cooking and take the food from the stove. So, without hesitating, Naropa went to get it, and was beaten up by people and almost died. Then Tilopa came and healed him. After that, one day, Tilopa did pipi in the sand and then threw the sand into Naropa’s face. Then he told Naropa to look up into the sky—there was the transformed mandala of Hevajra. Tilopa then gave Naropa the initiation.

All these twelve great hardships were there to cause Naropa’s enlightenment, to purify him, through Tilopa’s great skill in guiding his disciple, with a strong devotional mind.

You are in my prayers every day.

With much love and prayer ...