The Faults of Criticizing and Blaming Others
by Lama Zopa Rinpoche
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| An edited version of
a letter from Lama Zopa Rinpoche to one of the FPMT centers
under his care, August 1995. |
Criticizing and blaming others
The most important Dharma practice is to cease the delusions,
the three poisonous minds, which are the root of all suffering,
as well as the self-centered mind. All the reciting of mantras
and prayers, listening to Dharma, meditating, prostrating,
offering mandalas, making offerings at the altar to the holy
objects—all of it is for ceasing the delusions and ego.
Therefore
the main Dharma practice is to watch the mind during your
daily life and to try to free it from being controlled by
delusion; to stop torturing yourself with delusions, abusing
yourself with your own delusions. How? By applying the three
principal aspects of the path and tantra—or at the very least,
impermanence and death.
We
should realize that the mind is like a baby and we always
need to watch it and take care of it; forgetting to do this
for even a few minutes can bring danger to a small child.
Suddenly the mind is in great danger, which means your life
is in great danger. Because your life is controlled by delusion
and engaged in karma, your suffering of samsara will be without
end.
We
blame and criticize others because we don't like suffering.
But if we don't like suffering, we should not harm others
and create disharmony; this is what interferes with our happiness.
What we want and what we are doing are opposite.
Of
course, this doesn't mean one can't point out others' mistakes
at all. But when you do, as much as possible do it with loving
kindness and compassion. For the sake of others, one can point
out mistakes and make suggestions—this is how you discuss
and communicate according to Dharma. This way there is no
danger for oneself; one doesn't create negative karma, which
throws oneself over the precipice of the three lower realms.
Although
you do your meditation sessions and sadhanas and recite mantra,
most of the day is wasted if your work is not connected to
Dharma. Not only that, your precious human body is used to
create the lower realms. Whatever you do must be according
to lam-rim; that is the guideline for this life and future
lives.
Being criticized and blamed by others
If you are being criticized by others, use it for Dharma practice,
the path to enlightenment, the means for bringing happiness,
temporal and ultimate, to all sentient beings. By utilizing
the experience of the problem in this way, you can keep your
mind in the state of happiness. With this thought transformation
practice, the best practice of Dharma, one sacrifices one's
own life for others in order to obtain their happiness.
This
blaming, these complaints against "me," are the manifestation
of many lifetimes of heavy karmas. Use it as much as possible
to pacify your own anger and ill will towards others, which
is the enemy of bodhicitta, in order to complete the paramita
of patience, which is the path to enlightenment. Use it to
develop bodhicitta by taking upon yourself all sentient beings'
karma of receiving complaints and being blamed. Experience
it for others.
The motivation is the point
Some people are crazy about democracy. However, a country
can be run by one person or by democracy, but if the leaders
do not have omniscient mind or reliable clairvoyance there
is always the possibility of mistakes.
When
there is no merit and the negative karma hasn't been purified
(and, on top of that, even more is being created), it doesn't
matter how many smart ideas there are, or whether they come
from one person or a group—nothing works. Good results come
from good karma created in the past lives. Education about
this doesn't exist in the West.
If
the leader of a country—even if it is a dictatorship, in the
sense that decisions are made by one person—has omniscient
mind, can see past, present and future and has completed the
mind training in compassion, then there is no danger for others
from those decisions. In fact, people receive only the greatest
benefit.
Even
if the leader is not Buddha but just a bodhisattva, because
they have so much compassion there would be no cheating and
no ego power, no taking sides without thinking of the happiness
of sentient beings. There would only be benefit to others—a
bodhisattva has nothing else to be concerned about except
the happiness of others.
If
Hitler or Mao Tse Tung, for example, had had education about
and experience in compassion, then millions would have had
great peace.
Because decisions are
made by one person, the director of a center, say, it doesn't
mean that it will always be negative or that the person is
acting like a dictator. When a country or a center is not
guided according to Dharma, especially bodhicitta (that is,
without a selfish mind) problems always come.
Of
course, democracy gives freedom to people to express their
opinions and feelings, and that makes them happy, but just
because something is democratically decided doesn't mean it
is always correct and the most beneficial. And, as I said
before, just because something is decided by one person doesn't
mean that it is wrong.
Decisions
in life have to be arrived at by analyzing the benefits and
the shortcomings, the same as in Dharma practice. So as ordinary
sentient beings—in other words, not having omniscience or
even the clairvoyance to see the future and karma—we must
make decisions with a motivation of loving kindness and on
the basis of whatever capacity of analytical discerning wisdom
we have.
However,
things turn out according to karma. This means that we can
create better karma for a better life, in order to be more
beneficial for others. And the same with a center: thinking
and acting in ways that are most beneficial to others. If
you hate the center you are working for, if you find it too
much of a problem, you can free yourself from the organizational
activities. You don't need to ruin others and oneself.
All
the centers run this way—with the director in charge, helped
by others who are in charge of the various aspects of the
center: this we call the management committee. It is made
up of the people who actually do the work; and, with the director,
who is also on the committee, it is responsible for the center's
day-to-day running and future development.
For
legal purposes there can be a board of directors; they should
come together as needed by law—once or twice a year, for example,
and can if necessary correct or advise the center on matters
of great importance. But the day to day activities and management
are left completely in the hands of the director and committee.
According
to the committee's discretion there can be various subcommittees,
for example, the spiritual program committee or fund-raising
committee; they would be responsible to the management committee
and would in fact have their representatives on the committee.
It is important to remember
that this is an FPMT center, here to serve sentient beings
and the teachings of the Buddha. It was founded by the incredibly
kind and compassionate Lama Yeshe who now exists in the form
of Lama Osel Rinpoche, who will soon guide the students. And
here we have a fully qualified Dharma teacher, a geshe, in
residence.
The
resident geshe or teacher—Tibetan or Western—is very important
to the center. Without a teacher, the center can't be of extensive
benefit to others. Because the resident teacher has an extremely
important role in the center—benefiting others mainly through
the Dharma—they and the director must have very good communication.
The success of the center, externally and internally, depends
on this. Together, the purpose is to serve sentient beings.
Any
individual is most welcome to come here, to study, meditate,
work and enjoy this beautiful place and special environment.
If you are not in agreement with the way things are run, please
discuss respectfully, treat each other with kindness.
I
always pray for those who are working hard for the center,
sacrificing their lives to serve others; I will always pray
this way. And I often pray and hope we all meet when Maitreya
comes and that together we will receive the prediction of
enlightenment.
With much love and prayer,
Thubten Zopa Rinpoche.
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