My most dear, most kind, most precious, wish-fulfilling one,
I read your emails.
If you can, take the eight Mahayana precepts. It is very good using the opportunity for enlightenment, that is most unbelievable, most amazing. What keeps coming out is for you to take the eight Mahayana precepts again and again. You can have a break, then take them again, and also do nyung näs.
Prostrations you can do with your hands in the mudra of prostration. The main thing is to visualize as many bodies as you can doing the prostrations. However many bodies that you visualize, you will get the same amount of merit as actually doing that many prostrations, so visualize as many bodies as possible. Think the visualized bodies fill the whole earth. Then you will get the same benefits, unbelievable, unbelievable, unbelievable merits, as though you actually had that many bodies and did that many prostrations.
Still you should not think, “I am going to live for so many years.” That concept of permanence comes even on the same day when you are dying and even five minutes before a car accident. Death can happen at any time, as you have heard so many times, therefore you need to practice, so do nyung näs as much as possible. If you are not familiar with that practice, others can help you. You can join in a group and later you can do them by yourself.
Even if you die by doing nyung näs, you won’t be reborn in the lower realms. It is most worthwhile, it is the best death, if you do with bodhicitta, first of all for sentient beings, for every sentient being—numberless hell beings, numberless hungry ghosts, numberless animals, numberless human beings, numberless sura beings and numberless asura beings.
This is my advice. Please make your life most meaningful with the thought of bodhicitta day and night and in everything that you do.
Of course, I am also praying.
With much love and prayers ...