When the Bush Starts Moving

By Tenzin Ösel Hita
Institut Vajra Yogini, Marzens, France (Archive #2090)

Tenzin Ösel Hita gave this talk on December 27, 2018 at the Institut Vajra Yogini in Marzens, France during a course given by Venerable Robina Courtin. Ösel spoke to a wide range of topics including education, masculinity, patience, discipline, jealousy and anger. You can watch the edited video on the LYWA Youtube channel or view Institut Vajra Yogini's complete talk here

Tenzin Ösel Hita with Geshe Lobsang Tengye at Institut Vajra Yogini, France, February 2017.

Ven. Robina Courtin: This gentleman’s name, his mother called him Ösel, his family name is Hita, Ösel Hita. In spite of his wishes, some of us in our heart think of him as Lama Ösel, me for example, because I have confidence, because His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Lama Zopa had said so, that he is the reincarnation of Lama Yeshe, who was my guru; but I don’t know, I’m not clairvoyant; maybe he is fooling us. 

I haven’t had a conversation with him since he was about six. I met him first when he was two, it was in Melbourne, his attendant was the Venerable Gloria, a Spanish nun. I found myself cooking for him; I never cooked for anyone, I don’t know cooking. He was very bossy. He didn’t speak English nor Spanish but when he wanted his dinner, he would say: "Yum, yum." When I wore the wrong colours, he didn’t speak to me. I had to take off my blue cardigan to put on a red one. Sometimes he behaved very sweetly and sometimes he was extremely naughty.

Again, I met him in Kopan and somehow I had the job of taking care of him. I don’t know how I got that job. Anyway, it was impossible. He was about six and this time, definitely, he could speak. He was always very rude with me. He is the only one on this planet who ever called me on my speed. He was saying, "Oh, Ani nervous. Why are you so nervous?" I was unable to answer. I didn’t know why. He would never do what I said. And the worst thing, I had these nice red gloves that someone gave me, that I was very attached to, he stole them from me. They will be extremely useful to me, he said. He had to climb the walls like Spiderman and it stopped his hands from getting hurt, so I’m happy it had this good function. I never saw them again.

Anyway, he was a monk for a while. Then when he was eighteen, he left. I don’t know exactly what his profession is, but I think, he tried everything. I think he tries to conquer the world, I’m not sure. We never know where he is. One minute he is in Spain, in Ibiza, then in Melbourne, then in Brazil. Now he is here, we never know. Now he is a father, he is wifeless but he is a father. It didn’t take long. The little boy is here, the cutest you can imagine. He speaks Tibetan, Spanish, English and some French, I noticed. So I think he is trying to conquer the world. It would be nice if he could say a few things. Thank you very much.

[Mandala offering, Heart Sutra, refuge, etc.]

Ösel: So today is very, very, super improvised, just like life. You can prepare, you can plan, you can think, it’s never going to happen like you imagined. It’s always going to be different. So we start improvising and then we accept that it’s improvisation. I was thinking maybe we can all participate together. So like maybe, people to come up with certain chapters or topics, So then, I’ll write them down and we’ll go through them. So please help me. No topics?

Student: Education.

Ösel: What kind of education? General? Universal Education?

Student: Patience.

Student: Masculinity.

Ösel: I’ll try to understand.

Student: The fear of missing (of lacking something, of missing out of something.) 

Student: Jealousy.

Student: Discipline.

Ösel: That’s a good one.

Student: Attachment to a loved one.

Ösel: Like a partner? Partner or just objects of desire? 

Student: Specifically partner.

Student: Anger.

Student: Compulsions.

Student: Love.

Ösel: OK, very nice. So, we’ve finished the talk now. So education, we’ll start with that. So, what is education? I think education is learning, right? Even if we have the best teacher in the universe, if we have no interest, if we are lazy, if we don’t want to learn, if we don’t pay attention, it’s completely useless, a waste of time. So that’s why in education, the main part is oneself. And it’s a constant education in life, from the moment we are born to the moment we’re passing away, we’re still learning something new. Even though theoretically we died many times, we are relearning; so basically, education is a learning, an understanding, growth, evolution but, of course, you have to be humble in order to do that. And in many cases, the more we learn, the more we know, the more we think, we don’t have to learn anything else, we become very proud and then we’re like, "Oh I know everything already." So we get stuck on our ideas, we are not open to others ideas, we’re not open to learning, we think our point of view is the only correct one, and we’ll even fight to maintain that point of view, and then we become ignorant.

So wisdom is when you know that you don’t know anything and you’re open to learning. That’s the real wisdom because everything is changing, everything is movement, vibration; nothing is stable, nothing is all the time the same, unless, of course, we talk about space, etc, but this is another story. 

We’re talking here about what we can see, what we can feel. So because everything is changing, we have to always keep relearning. If you think about it, everything we see, how we understand, it is based on a memory; if you wipe out the memory, you can’t even open a door. That’s why, if you think about it, memory is what makes us think that we know. But if you take out the memory, then we don’t understand anything. But also, if you think about it, how do you know this memory is correct? How do you know it’s a real memory? It’s happened many times, I know many stories – it’s the same story, three or four different versions, each person has a different version, they’re really different. And nobody knows which is the real one and what really happened. Each person is sincerely talking based from their memory, that shows very clearly that everybody has completely different perspectives. So it’s mainly based on where you are, which is your circumstance.

When you see the reflection of the sun on the ocean - I like this example, that’s why I always use it - when you see the reflection, you see it coming to you based on where you are, the spot that you are. The person on the other side of the beach is seeing their own reflection of the sun on the water. Each person only sees a thin path of sunlight on the water coming towards them. But the truth is that the whole ocean is shining. When you go on the plane, you can see it, the whole sea is golden. So this is a metaphor to talk about reality. What we see is only a small part of what really is, but we hold onto that as if it’s the center of the universe, the most important thing, our perspective is the only real perspective, like that.

So that’s why education, if you are humble, then you can always be learning, and that’s what life is about. One of the things about life is learning, constant learning, it never stops, not even in the moment of your passing away. So always look at life as something new, something fresh; when you wake up in the morning, your first thought should be: How can I be of benefit? Then when you learn, you learn based on that intention. When you go to sleep, you think: How was I of benefit, and what can I improve? That is your intention. Otherwise, what’s the purpose of life? If you think about it, for example, in Buddhism or Dharma or the warm-heart philosophy, if there is nobody, then how can you practice? How are you going to practice patience or compassion if you are alone in the universe? Dharma only works if there’s sharing, if there’s many people, many sentient beings. Is that correct, Robina? 

Because of course, you can think that meditating alone in a cave, you can meditate on compassion, but that compassion is always based on sentient beings, including the sentient beings that you cannot see in all the dimensions of all the times. So of course, the whole purpose is the company, the sharing, the understanding, the growing together. Otherwise it’s not really a lot of meaning; if it’s only about me, me, me, me, then it’s not interesting. Even if you’re in paradise all by yourself, what are you going to do? I’m joking. But I know many people who like to have silence and to be alone, and this is what they treasure the most. Of course, it’s important because if we’re not calm inside, if we’re not able to love ourselves or help ourself, then how are we going to help anybody? It’s ridiculous.

Like number five came out discipline, right? Without discipline, wanting to help sentient beings is ridiculous. First, you have to start with oneself, train your mind, train your body, of course, and then from there, you start slowly, slowly, slowly.

So just to finish up the education, then we’ll go to masculinity, or masculine education, positive masculinity, but you’ll have to explain to me. But just to finish up the education, now that I have a son, I saw very clearly; he is fifteen months old, he is here actually, somewhere around. I can hear him. But I realize that a baby, you can’t teach them how to walk on two legs, you can’t teach them to walk on four legs, but you can walk on four legs or walk on two legs, and then they will see that, or four legs also. At the beginning, when he was not walking on four legs, I’d walk in front of him to help him to learn, then he will see. That’s why, the baby, he learns himself, you cannot learn for him or teach him, you know. He only himself can learn. That is the basis of education, starting from each individual, and always be humble enough to know that we know nothing, and then you’ll be wise.

OK, so can you please specify when you said positive masculinity? Is that based on machism and all this?

Student: It is based on the idea that we need to educate men a different way, because nowadays and also in the past, they were more reserved with their feelings etc.

Ösel: OK, I’ll just going to talk from my point of view. If I’m wrong, please correct me. This is my concept. So I’m probably wrong. So basically, I see it a little bit like this: the men, they evolve in a straight line, they go from A to B, finished. The women they evolve in a spiral, so they cover much more ground, so they are much more evolved in that sense, they cover much more ground, and, of course, they are the door of the universe. So inside the culture of history, because the female has been so much more superior to the men, in that sense – the wisdom and understanding, evolution, all these concepts - you have to be if you are going to create life, it’s so powerful- so obviously, they are much more grounded. So I think in the history of the cultures in the world and the society, the men have been scared of the potential of the women. Even though ancient times used to be matriarchal, it changed because I think the men, through their physical power and the ignorance also, they tried to put down the women out of fear that the women would be superior to them, more and more, which is true actually.

Through history, it has been happening a lot many many times, for many thousand of years. If you study history, you’ll see. There’s many, many cultures that they idolized women, and the woman is like a god. It’s just based on circumstances and times and mainly on individuals, of course. But, of course, I think education is very important, to teach the children. I have many friends, for example, who, based on their education, they act in a certain way. I have friends, I have many different friends from all over the world, so I have seen many different cases.

In some cases, the women cook with their daughter, and the boys and the father, they just sit at the table and chill; then they eat; then the women take the plates, they wash, they clean, and the men are just sitting like that. The women are the ones who work. In India, I have seen it a lot. If you go, just you see it when they’re building a house, you can see the women are carrying maybe twenty bricks on their head, and they’re paid maybe twenty rupees a day; and then the men, they call them mistri so they’re the ones who do the, put the cement, so they do the cement and they get paid much more. But the woman is the one who does the hard work. So how did that happen if the man is much stronger physically? This is just one point in many aspects in society which don’t make any sense at all. We could be talking about this for many long hours, you know. There are many different aspects.

It has come to this but things are changing, thanks to education. It’s very important, the education is very, very important. As His Holiness Dalai Lama says, education is the future. Does it clarify it a little bit? I don’t know, it’s just my point of view. I think it’s very important that, of course, we are all equal and we have to really respect each other, no matter our gender, it doesn’t really matter; no matter the gender, the position or the responsibilities, the experience the wisdom or whatever, it doesn’t matter. You have to treat everybody the same way. We should speak with respect, with humility, with understanding, with empathy, with patience; so that’s basically my perspective about this. I could keep, talking but I think that maybe enough. Is that OK for you?

So next one, patience. I think most of us think we are very patient, no? Until something happens when we are stressed, many things, maybe not just one thing, maybe one thing happened, tac, tac, tac, but then it starts building up, and then there’s one moment that we permit to lose patience because we think we have the right. We justify the fact that we can talk this way or act this way, but obviously, its’ ridiculous; afterwards we’ll regret it. There’s only very, very few cases where it’s good to be wrathful, but only with a certain wisdom behind, and empathy, of course. Otherwise, it’s counterproductive.

Most of the time, if you touch the other person’s ego, they shut down. And then they don’t listen and there’s no communication; and they will also say something, and your ego also jump, and then it becomes totally useless. It’s like the Tibetan saying: When you stir shit, all you get is the smell of shit. I like the Tibetan sayings, they are very wise, simple but wise.

Even if you don’t have a very positive intention, I think if you talk with empathy, with humility, it is always going to have a very positive effect; and if it doesn’t work, then it’s not your problem. You can’t take it personally, you don’t have to take responsibility for everybody’s mistakes. 

But the most important aspect of patience is that you never have to have patience with anybody; you have to be patient with yourself because that is where the patience lies. You can’t blame somebody, saying, "Oh I lost patience because he did this or she did this or they said that." This is ridiculous. The patience, you lost with yourself. So as long as you have patience with yourself, and you know that you don’t have the right to lose patience with anybody, including and especially starting with yourself, then you can be patient with everybody, starting with yourself. So remember, next time you are about to lose patience think: "I have to be patient with myself" not with anybody else but with yourself. This is a very private, personal job.

And also, of course, you have to take responsibility, it’s very easy to blame others, so easy, "Oh it’s not my fault. I was very stressed, and then this happened and that happened, and then this happened and that happened and then I lost patience." No, you lost patience with yourself. You always have the chance and the opportunity not to lose patience. The only reason that you lose patience is because you think you are very important. Don’t worry, you are not the center of the universe! You are important but you’re not that important! It’s like the saying: Be humble because you belong, but be proud because you are. It’s beautiful what we are, the potential of a buddha. If you are able to use the ego, to use the pride - maybe I’ll change the word ‘pride’, I’ll change it to dignity- then it can really help to improve, because basically in life, it’s evolution or devolution. The more you evolve, the easier it is to evolve, the more you devolve, the faster, the easier it is to devolve. The more positive thoughts and actions and speech, the easier it is to do that every time; and the more bad thoughts, negative thoughts, negative actions and negative speech you have, the easier it is to go down. It’s never too late to start now, because it’s always now.

OK. Patience. And for me, I thought personally, every time I lose patience, I regret so much; and even if I say, "Sorry, sorry, sorry" many times, it cannot really repair the mistake or the damage. The only good thing positive thing that I can take from that is to look at myself and to see my own ego, how big it is – like a cathedral, huge; so that is the only positive thing I see from losing patience, to observe the reaction, the mechanism - where is it coming from, how does it come and why does it come. These are the three important questions you have to make every time you lose patience. And of course, if you lose patience, it’s very important to say sorry because it not only helps you to heal and to learn, but it also helps for the other person to forgive. And many times, if they don’t forgive, they carry that weight also, and vice versa. You know, when you forgive, you don’t carry the weight of the mistake of the other person. Does that make sense? Yeah, so something like that.

OK number three, fear of lacking: I know I have a friend who’s like that a little bit. For New Year’s Eve, they’re always very paranoid, very worried that they’re not gonna to be in the right place for New Year. So many things happening, it’s like you can only choose one place to be, so they suffer and in the end, they project, they expect so much, so wherever they are, even everybody’s celebrating, they’re unhappy. They think, "Oh, somewhere else is better, somewhere else, people are having more fun." So then in the end, after New Year, they’re looking on the videos and photos of everybody else, and they’re like, "Oh I should have gone there. I should have done that." It’s a little bit like in life, many times it happens to us, you know, we’re unsatisfied.

And here we come into the first reason of suffering. So like in Star Wars, they say from the attachment, comes the suffering. But what brings the attachment? The fear of losing. So the fear brings attachment, and attachment brings suffering, and the suffering takes you to the dark side. So you become best friends with Darth Vader even though after he became a good guy. Because inside he was good always, and that’s how it is we all have the potential of Buddha, no matter what. So you can never say, "Oh, this person is a bad person", or "This person doesn’t deserve my respect, doesn’t deserve my love." This is ridiculous because deep, deep, deep down inside, we all come from the same source, which is love. I don’t want to go too deep there, but I’m sure you all understand; the air we breathe, we all share, yeah, just like the space, we all share.

Anyway, fear of lacking, so that fear, that fear is what brings the suffering because we get attached; the fear brings attachment. Why are we attached? Because, actually, if you think about it, not even our body is ours because one day, it becomes worm food. It goes back to star dust. So maybe temporarily, we can say, "Oh this, my body is mine," but if it’s really ours, we would know exactly what’s going inside, no? But we have no idea what’s happening; we don’t even know what’s happening in our mind, which mind is so subtle. Imagine the body, it’s gross and we still don’t know about that, so it’s very complicated but it’s very simple; the complications, we make them. So when we stop complicating things, then we can really see the ils sont malheureux, the simpleness of life, the simplicity. So why do we complicate everything so much, that is the question, but that’s also another story so let’s just focus on what we are talking about.

So we fear losing something that we don’t own; we fear losing something that we can never have or own. You can say,"Oh I bought a new car" but then tomorrow somebody steals the car, and then it’s not your car. The same thing happens to the body. So if you say, "This is my body" but then tomorrow you become sick and you die, and then where did your body go? Is it really yours? So what is really yours?

Your intention, your karma, this can be yours, and this you can work on. And you don’t have to fear of losing that. As a matter of fact,the real values, interior values, when you share, when you give, it multiplies and then it comes back a thousand times stronger. So that’s the real wealth, the true value, and that is, I think, something that inside the education system is maybe missing a little bit, because they teach us how to work but they don’t teach how to live. We work to live, we don’t live to work. So that’s why instead of fearing of losing something or not gaining something, let's focus on what we really have, which is intention, and from there, comes the karma. So that is what we have to focus on, and next time we have fear of losing or attachment, or this, or that, switch your mind.

Because I know, like there’s a saying in English, the grass always looks greener on the other side. But the only reason is because we’re not looking inside, we’re always looking outside. We don’t realize that life for us starts from the inside, not from the outside, understanding comes from the inside. The learning comes from the inside. The experience comes from the inside, you know. Everything starts from there, so we focus on that. And if we can understand that properly, then we can understand the outside. 

We can really be of benefit because we see, we understand reality. We can help others also to have that transformation. And that intention, we can call Dharma, the intention in action through the three: body, speech and mind. So fear sometimes can save our lives, if we have fear of losing our body or hurting ourselves, this is instinct –thanks to that, we are able to continue the evolution of the species, whatever you want to call it, but that’s a different type of fear. We have to focus on why we have this mind fear like me, me, me, this grasping. 

This is based on a pattern. How do you say patrón in English? Conditioning, maybe? Habit. Habit, like conditioning, and it’s not just from this life, it comes from many lives. So we perceive the sensation, we react to the sensation, then we create the conditionment, and this conditionment is the base of suffering. If we change the reaction that we have, then we can eliminate the suffering. So how do we that? By being more equanimous. If we are neutral to the sensation, then we don’t have to react. 

There are three types of reactions; grasping, neutrality or indifference, I don’t care - and rejection. That’s something that we have to also be able to change. For example, compassion is for all sentient beings, not just for the people that you know, the close people, "Oh, I have compassion for them, but I don’t have compassion for somebody else." This doesn’t make sense, this is not real compassion. Like you can do prostrations, you can do meditation, mantras, this blah, blah, everything, and then you go to the restaurant and you talk really bad to the waiter, for example. Or you talk to somebody. Or maybe, you don’t treat yourself with respect, and you say, "Oh, I’m stupid", and the body believes it, so that’s also not good. So the practice – mainly like the prostrations, the mantra, the meditation- all of this, is complementary. It’s not the main practice; the main practice is a warm heart, starting with yourself, expanding from there, OK?

Number four, jealousy. Can I have some suggestions? What is jealousy for you? Any suggestions? Just one word or a combination of a couple of words, but keep it short.

Students: Envy; frustration; possession and possessiveness; the wish to have for oneself the happiness of others; a teacher, it can teach us learning because you can learn through jealousy; competitiveness; competition.

Ösel: Well, jealousy is becoming complex now. Wow, OK. You see, for example, this one, frustration, this I can identify with jealousy. Jealousy, envy, this is one of the poisons, and you know why? Because we judge without knowing, right. So for example, in our society, we think that accumulating material wealth is going to bring us happiness. So then when we see billionaires, we see their lifestyle, we become jealous and actually, that’s the purpose when you show off the sports car, the house, the lifestyle, the whole purpose is to make jealous to people. It’s like the culture, to boost my ego, I’m going to show off what I have, and that’s supposedly going to make me happy. But the truth is it makes you miserable because it’s completely empty. There is no meaning to it. But, of course, because of our ignorance, we judge and we think that the other person is happy. We think that that is what we want and that is what we need to be happy. Because in the capitalistic society, we have been educated that way to compare, compare and think, "Why don’t I have that? I should have that. They are happy. I’m not. I want to be happy," and then the jealousy comes. And then you poison yourself, you make yourself miserable. But the truth is that the other person is much more miserable than you because material wealth is never going to make someone happy. It’s only dissatisfaction all the time - the more you have, the more you want; the more you have, the more worry, the more problems, the more distrust. You distrust people because you don’t know what is their intention. When you have a lot of material wealth, it’s difficult to. You don’t know what is their intention, everybody wants a piece of your wealth. So with the jealousy, we only focus on this very small perspective. We don’t realize all the other aspects of suffering that the other person can have. So the moment you switch jealousy into compassion, then you transform this poison and then it becomes something really positive.

And yes, possession, possessiveness, frustration, the wish to have. OK, so frustration, we get frustrated through jealousy, like I described before, because we judge without understanding. That’s how we get frustrated, you know, like me, I don’t have enough, I don’t have the right situation, I should have more, I deserve more, why I don’t have this, why, why, blah blah blah… In the end, you become miserable and you aren’t able to appreciate the gift of life, so precious moment to moment. The moment we are able to appreciate what we have here and now, you have compassion, and the intention to help, then that’s the real happiness, that’s the true happiness, you don’t need anything else really. The body needs food, of course, and good company and warmth at night and shelter and blah blah, it becomes more and more complicated, but the basic is to have a happy mind, and everything else will follow because the body follows the mind. If you have a happy mind, then your body will be happy also because your mind influences the body. If you are depressed, your body becomes depressed, all your cells become depressed.

So it’s good to dance sometimes, it’s good to listen to music sometimes, it’s good to eat good food, healthy food, to exercise, have positive thoughts, the intention to help, and all this will bring you what we call ‘happiness’. But there is not really such a thing as happiness, it’s just a concept. If it was real, which it is, but it’s another level, it would be a state of mind, a constant state of mind. Some people call it liberation from samsara or nirvana. So the moment you have these small details, then you create the cause not to be unhappy. And that, for now, it’s more than enough. As long as you are not unhappy, you are doing good. Because the happiness we’re looking for is very temporary. We can be grasping, grasping, grasping something that you can never catch. So it doesn’t really makes sense, "I want to be happy, I want to be happy", but you don’t even know what that is. You have a concept, but once we say, "oh maybe, when I get this car or when I have this beautiful girlfriend, when I have a nice house and a family and this and that, or when I have a good job that pays well", all these concepts; "when I have a realization or the opportunity to meditate, to practice Dharma, then I’ll be happy", this concept, but when it happens, then the concept changes and we have another concept.

I have a friend who was studying in the Masters Program in Lama Tsongkhapa and I asked her, "Do you do meditation?" She said ,"No, now, I’m studying, when I have a cave, I will meditate." It’s a little bit like that, no? We create this concept-when I have the cave, the perfect conditions, then I’ll practice, but the perfect conditions, they’re always now and here and nowhere else. A concept is a concept. It’s like a thought it comes and goes. Like the clouds, you go to grab them, you can’t touch, you can’t grab. It looks real, but it’s empty. So that’s why we get frustrated based on our ignorance, based on the comparison, based on the ego that doesn’t exist, and the possessions, all these bring suffering, so we have to be able to switch that. Observe your mind, observe how the mind works, the mechanism, the conditioning, the pattern. Even if you can’t think about the past lives, at least think about in this life. So it’s not easy from one moment to another to change, but when it happens, as long as we are aware, then it creates the condition to slowly change, we create the conditions for the change to occur. We cannot change ourselves, but we can create the conditions for that change to occur. Do you want to have a pipi break? It’s 17:17. So we can do pipi break because we are halfway through now so…OK, thank you.

[Break]

Hello again. I forgot to mention something at the beginning of the talk. All I wanted to say was that actually there is nothing for me to teach; all I can do is to remind people what we already know. So I just wanted to clarify that part: I’m not a teacher, I’m just a friend who helps to remind you. I need a lot of reminding too, so we help each other. And like they say the real friend is the one who criticizes you in front of you, constructive criticism. Behind your back, they talk very good about you. That’s a real friend. 

So we were finishing jealousy, but I remembered there is one very important aspect about jealousy – the boyfriend-girlfriend, girlfriend-boyfriend jealousy aspect, the grasping one, the anger jealousy. So it happens all the time, right? First you love somebody, and obviously it’s not really love, it’s attachment. Why am I saying it’s not real love? There are two reasons: one, it brings suffering afterwards; and number two, you can hate as much as you can love. So you say, "Oh I love you, I love you", and the next day, "I hate you, I hate you." That’s why that type of love is not the real love, it’s temporary attachment. The real thing is that we get attached to the feeling that the other person makes us feel. We are not attached to the person. We are attached to the feeling he gives us, or better said, the feeling that arises within us based on the presence of the other person, on our projection. Sometimes we either idealize, and when we idealize, then after it’s like slapping ourselves. So that’s why, you know, we have to be able to differentiate this one. Jealousy comes from not the real love one, from the love, but the wrong concept of love because if it’s real, unconditional love, if the other person is happy, you would be happy, right? And if the other goes with somebody else, "Oh I rejoice! I’m so happy, you’re happier with them, great!"

I think there are very few people who can react like that. I have a friend, actually, who is like that – a couple, they have been together now maybe twelve years or more, thirteen. While they were together, the girl has had four relationships, one three months, another four months, another eight months, like that. So within the relationship, she had other relationships. He’s super happy all the time - il s’en fout- he doesn’t care. That for me was wow! How is that possible? But he said, "Oh no, it’s OK, doesn’t matter. If she is happy, I’m happy, it’s fine." I don’t think it’s the right thing to do, it’s very, very risky, very, very risky. It can create a lot of problems, a lot of conflict, and jealousy can come up very easily, but in this case which is very rare, I’ve seen it. And as a matter of fact, they have a kid now, a daughter, very close friends of mine, and now they’re together very, very happy. That guy is my hero, very close, I always ask him, "How do you do it?" He says, "I don’t know. It’s the way I am." He doesn’t care, just unattached. He focuses on the happiness of the other person. It’s not possessiveness, it’s not "I want to be happy." It’s the desire of the happiness for the other that you can love. My own happiness, I want to possess because of my happiness, that’s not the real love. And when you say, "Oh I love you, I love you," everyday, ten to fifteen times a day, but then in one second, something happens and the anger comes out and then you say, "Oh, sorry, sorry and you know I love you! I love you!" and the next day, "I hate you!" But it’s true that hate and love are quite linked together. According to what I understand, the opposite of love is indifference, not hate, but that’s another story. So that was a part of the jealousy topic. I think it’s the important part to cover, just to be clear, to be aware of that.

Number five, discipline. I think this is quite a difficult one, it sounds easy, to think of it is easy, to say is easy but to do it, to do it temporarily is easy, the difficult part is to maintain it. The main part of discipline is constance. Without constance, there is no discipline; without discipline, you cannot benefit anybody. So if you want to benefit, first you start with discipline. You start with your mind. So it’s the mind that you can think of it like a monkey, or better, like a wild animal. A crazy wild animal can really hurt you and can hurt others. So we have to be able to tame it. It's the first step for discipline. If you can’t tame your mind, then you forget about discipline, forget about helping others; you can just sleep until 4.00 in the afternoon, then you have back pain and you have headache, so discipline is very important.

For example, for some people it’s very easy to wake up early in the morning, I have friends at 7 am, they open eyes. They are very active, they do this and that, already making list of what they are going to do today, tac, tac, tac. And then people like me, eight o’clock, ho, a little bit more, 9 o’clock, 9:15, 9:20. And many times it’s 9:30, 10 o’clock when I get up, and then I feel bad: Oh I wasted already three hours! So already, I start off with a bad foot. This is not discipline so then I can’t be of benefit. This has to start from the beginning, you know. Sometimes hardship, difficulty, you can reap the best reward. That’s the nature for humans, it’s like that. The harder you work, the more difficult the challenge, the better the satisfaction, the happier you are with the result, more satisfying. It’s like computer games, you know, the computer games that are very successful, it’s because they are very difficult. The easy ones like pacman, after a while you are bored. But the difficult ones, you can keep playing, playing, and then challenge, challenge, then you enjoy because when you win, you are like: Ah yeah, I accomplished something. Even if it’s a two-dimension screen, you still get a little bit of satisfaction. So then you are dissatisfied because you want to keep playing.

So it’s a little bit like life also, but life is very different, it has many more dimensions in aspects. So discipline for each person is different, you know. For example, like the people who easily wake up at 7:00 am, maybe they wake up at 7 am, no problem, but they may have an addiction problem, they smoke a lot of cigarettes, and they cannot stop. So they don’t have the discipline to stop even if they want to. So discipline comes in many different aspects. It’s not just a schedule that you follow every day. It’s up to you how you feel that the real discipline should be, but mainly for everybody it’s the same, we have to discipline, to tame our mind first of all, to understand the nature of the mind, discipline, then to control the thoughts, the intentions, the habits.

The habits are very dangerous; can also be very beneficial, depends on you – the more you do it, the easier it is to do. That’s the advantage and disadvantage of the habit, it’s the nature of the human: the more we do something, the easier it becomes to do that. You choose, when you see that you have an habit, if you are unhappy with the result, then you have to discipline yourself. I think discipline can have very good result if you know what’s good for you and what's not good for you. That’s up to you, even though the mind can sometimes fool you, try to play tricks on you. So sometimes you convince yourself, "Oh, I had no choice", or "It’s too difficult", "It’s not possible", or "It doesn’t matter, it’s not so important", "It’s OK", or in Spanish way, "I’ll do it tomorrow!", Mediterranean way, maybe, "demain, demain," but tomorrow never comes. Without discipline, it’s very difficult to accomplish anything because, I mean, we can learn small things every day, but the improvement, the learning is the constant. That’s why, I think, discipline is one of the strong pillars of one’s practice.

Without discipline, it’s very difficult and sometimes, I think, you know, -this is a different subject, OK - but I have a friend, he passed away, actually two years ago, he used to say animals are much more intelligent than humans; when they wake up, they don’t need anything, they don’t need toothbrush, they don’t need a bed, clothes or shoes or all these things that humans need. When they wake up, they already have their clothes on, they come out and enjoy, like that. So it’s a joke. But sometimes when you think about it, you say OK, maybe, animals are much more practical than humans, even though the animal realm is pure suffering, constant suffering, fear of getting eaten, of getting attacked, looking for food, competition, all these things. I have another friend, an Indian guy, he used to tell me, "I always pray," he is Hindu, "When I pray, I pray: please if I’m reborn I would like to be reborn as a dog in America", in the United States because they have much better life than human beings. They live a five star luxury life. They’re taken care of, and they have bed and best food.

So some people have that kind of concept but luckily, we know that the human rebirth is so precious. We have the opportunity to practice Dharma, that’s why; because we suffer and we’re able to enjoy at the same time. Because if it’s only enjoyment, then we have no thought to practice, because we are always in bliss. And if we don’t suffer, then we’re not aware that maybe, there is something wrong that we have to do something. For example, you are a god, then it’s all complete bliss, and then you don’t practice until the very last moment, when it’s too late. So when the karma finishes, you go straight down to the lower realm. So if you’re reborn as an animal or a hungry ghost, you are suffering so much, you have no time to practice, you can’t, you don’t have the capacity or even the thought to practice, so much suffering!

And the same case happens also in the human realm people who have so much material wealth, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, only when they get old, and they are about to die, they have the thought, "Oh, I wasted my time. I didn’t do anything for anybody." And the same thing happens to people who suffer a lot: they suffer, suffer so much that sometimes in the culture, they create hate, and then they suffer and they want to give suffering also, vicious circle. So we are very, very lucky to be able to have a little bit of both, but at the same time, to have this perfect human rebirth. We can take the middle path, and evolve through that, and make a difference. So we can help the people who are enjoying too much -temporary enjoyment- and also help the people who are suffering all the time -even though it’s temporary suffering. We have this big opportunity, so don’t waste it. That’s what I’m trying to say. So discipline is a pillar, even though I’m not an example, I ask you, please, don’t use me as an example use His Holiness the Dalai Lama or Lama Zopa Rinpoche as an example. They’re the real living example, you know. So discipline, OK.

OK, number six, attachment and partners. So we have gone through with the jealousy, we already talked a little bit on that. So attachment, we already talked about attachment, you know, grasping, wanting more; the more you have, the more you want. The less you have, the less you want, even though you can project, you project but the thing is, for example, it ‘s like some people say, "Oh, money is bad." It is true money, influence, power can corrupt you, but it depends upon the person and how they use it, what is the intention that they have. If the intention is selfish, hundred per cent, it will corrupt you. But if the intention is pure, of wanting to benefit, then the result can be very positive. Yes, so actually, we already covered the attachment a little bit, so we already did it. Are you satisfied with the attachment, partners, yeah?

OK, anger, number seven. Anger is very, very, very dangerous because with one second of anger, you can burn so much good karma. You can really destroy a lot of good things that you create. To create is very difficult, I mean to build, to create is very difficult, but to destroy is very easy. In one second, you can destroy something. It takes many, many years to create something. For example, if you look at an ant, it’s millions of evolution, and some people go, or a mosquito, for example, "Oh, it bit me" slap. And then what? Can you put back the mosquito? Not in a thousand years, you cannot, you don’t have that power. But why do you have the power to destroy it? Who gave you the right to destroy? The concept of me, the ego: I am so important. But we don’t realize that we don’t have the right, you know, because we cannot create that. Even today, with all the scientific technology, all the technology, all the wealth, all the engineers, you cannot build the pyramids. The Japanese, they tried but they can’t. Today, in the twenty-first century, they cannot make the pyramid, they cannot build the pyramids with all the technology they have, so if you can’t even build the pyramids, how are you going to rebuild an animal, something so small, so fragile.

That’s why really, if you have respect for life, you have respect for yourself, we respect life. If you’re humble and you’re grateful, then that respect comes by itself. If you get angry, it means you don’t have this. It means you are not humble, you are not respectful. Anger is very destructive, and then which is the result of anger, we all know. I don’t think anybody got angry and didn’t regret it, unless your pride is so big that you can’t see. And that’s the case for many people: your own pride completely blinds you, and you only look at the others, "You, it’s your fault! I got angry because of you, you, you! instead of, "Oh it’s my fault I got angry. I lost control. I didn’t have respect. I was not humble enough. I wasn’t patient enough with myself." Even if you get angry for one second, it’s enough, you know, it’s called destructive emotion, and the emotion doesn’t come out by itself, it is triggered by the thought and the thought is based on the ego, on the me "I’m so important. I have the right." But if you ask yourself why do you have the right, you can’t really find it. Why do you have the right to hit somebody for example? Who gives you the right to shout to somebody, to insult somebody? We have absolutely no right even to ourselves. That’s why don’t say these things like "Oh, I’m so stupid" or like that, it’s not very good, you know, your body will believe it and then, you’ll become stupid, no I’m joking. It’s not good to say because you create a pattern, a habit. Saying the other extreme "I’m so wise", "I’m so important" also is not helpful, no?

So always try to keep the middle path, equanimity. Try to keep the moderation, the middle path, then you can see more clearly. You can differentiate then you don’t make so many mistakes, even though as humans we learn from the mistakes. But the big mistake is to keep doing the same mistake again and again. That’s a real mistake. You make a mistake, you learn from it. There’s just a learning process as long as you are aware of it. But the real mistake is when you keep doing the same mistake again and again and again, life after life after life. So now is the time. Start now, not tomorrow. Tomorrow will never come, trust me. 

OK, anger. I would like to know, maybe some of you can tell me why do you get angry, maybe. Anybody have suggestion? What makes you angry? And when you get angry, do you think you have the justification to get angry? Or is it even beneficial? Does it really solve the problem? Think of it. Or does it make the problem much bigger. 

You see when you are humble, then you give the opportunity for the other person to be humble also. But if you are not humble, you don’t give that opportunity to the other person. If you’re proud, you talk to them like that [showing self-importance], then the person also will try to do more, then all you have is a battle of egos, and everybody loses. No, nobody wins, unless of course you learn. If you learn then it’s not so bad. You still lose, but at least you win a little bit. But as long as you’re learning, as long as you’re changing, recognizing, correcting, improving. So just be aware of the anger, because anger, most of the time, is hidden, hiding, hiding in the bushes, and it only comes out when it’s triggered. We allow it to come. It's like when a guest comes to our house in the middle of the night, a stranger at midnight or like 2 am; we’re sleeping and then knock, knock, like banging the door, boom, boom, boom. Do we come to the door, open, "Oh, please come in. I'll give you some snacks. I'll give you a foot massage." Do we do that even if it’s a family member, even if it’s our best friend? We have a serious face, "What do you want?" "Do you know what time it is?" That’s what we would say, right? Right? But when anger comes, what do we do? "Oh, welcome! Take over. My body is yours. My mind is yours."

Why do we do this? It’s a good question to ask. Even if we know the result will be totally destructive, totally unproductive, still we welcome it with open arms. So this is a question you have to ask. And the last thing about anger is to be able to be aware of when it’s coming. So it’s like for example, if you are in the jungle, in the Amazon, you’re exploring, you’re very suspicious of the wild animals, and suddenly, this bush moves; maybe there is an animal inside, you have to be ready, it’s a little bit like that. It’s not like you see the bush moving and say, "Oh, come attack me." No, you’re ready, it’s like that. With the anger, you have to be like that, always ready, fight or flee, fight or run or subdue, or make the anger your best friend. Otherwise, just learn from it. I get angry often, trust me. I always regret but still when it comes, I still welcome [opening his arms] "Oh welcome", because it’s a habit from so many lifetimes, so you can’t just change like that. If it was that easy, we would be enlightened already.

So it’s a slow job, slow work! Discipline. But be aware when the bush starts moving. I think that’s very important when you feel it’s coming; you have to be aware. Then you think ego, humility, respect, understanding, empathy, compassion. If you have compassion for the other person, you can never get angry unless, of course, you are realized and you know that the only way to help them is by getting angry or showing the aspect of anger. But this is another story. The intention, the main is intention. Most of the times we get angry not with the intention to help, it’s to show I’m the strong one, I’m right; we justify and then the anger comes out, "I'm right!". And you can see inside between friends, in the family and even between the countries, many times wars are all about this, the ego battle, battles of egos: I’m going to show you who’s stronger. I’m going to send my army, then I’m going to conquer you and then you’ll see I’m stronger than you.  That’s ridiculous but if you look at the history of humanity, it’s like that. 

So how do we start changing? That from the individual level; we can only work on ourselves; from there we start. We can judge a thousand people but if we don’t start judging ourselves, it’s totally useless, it doesn’t make any sense. We don’t even know ourselves. I don’t know how I’m going to react tomorrow if certain circumstances happen. Many times I surprise myself because I react in a certain way, then I think, "Oh I didn’t know. Where did this come from?" If we really knew ourselves, we’ll know exactly how we’re gonna to react if such as this happens or that happens. We don’t even know ourselves, so how can we judge somebody else? So don’t judge, don’t compare. If you want to compare, be productive comparison. Competition can be productive: "Oh, look they are so advanced. I want to advance too. I also want to be of benefit. Oh, he gets up at 4.30 am, I want to do that too!"  Then you wake up two days at 4.30, next day, you sleep: "Oh so difficult, so difficult!" Anyway, so the anger can really, really destroy, one of the destructive emotions. It’s very dangerous, very dangerous. So don’t welcome it if they knock on the door in the middle of the night, you have to ask the question: What are you doing here? Why are you here? What do you want? You are not coming in, sorry. You’re not welcome.

Anger is not welcome unless you can use it as a tool to be of benefit; but for that, you have to have certain realizations, so if you’re humble, you won’t use it that way. In the Tibetan, the anger they say anger, they call it wind, lung tsabo, hot wind. "Oh he is lung tsabo, he is a hot wind. It’s very funny!

Number eight, compulsions. So compulsion normally is based on habit, I think. We override the thought, and we go directly to the habit. In the same way, we have maybe muscle memory, we also have mind memory. Just to clarify, the muscles memory is like riding a bicycle – once you learn how to ride the bicycle, even twenty years later, even if you don’t ride at all, when you catch the bicycle, no problem, you know how to do it, because there’s a connection, the brain neurons already have a neural pathway, so it’s also there with the muscle, it’s connected. It’s like in the forest, you know, the more you walk your path, the easiest it is to walk.

The first time you walk, you have to go with a machete [gesture of going through]. If you go into the Amazon, you have to discover this; it’s a little bit like that, so you have to create the new habit. The first time is very difficult but every time you walk that, the more you do, the easier it is, the faster it is. The compulsions can be like that, from past life can come. So the compulsion can be a positive compulsion or a negative compulsion, depending on the habits that you've created this life or last life or many lives before. Compulsion normally is things that you do without thinking, and then you let it be, you give in to the compulsion. For example, like you see an animal drowning in the water, without thinking you jump directly - even if you have the phone in your pants, I’m joking - you just, you jump directly, you don’t think, you automatically saving, even your own life you don’t care, you forget, for one second you forget. Or the compulsion of maybe if you have the habit of smoking, even if you stopped smoking completely, suddenly you are in a group of people who are smoking, and you have the compulsion to smoke. Then you override the thought like, "Oh, I don’t know, why?" It’s a compulsion, then it comes; many examples like that, that’s what we have to be aware of, the compulsion, where they come from.

Of course sometimes, the positive compulsion can also be dangerous so we have to always be in control of our mind, the habits, the compulsions. For many people, the compulsion is much stronger, very strong. Compulsion, many times it wins. I have many friends who are drug addicts; for them, the compulsion is so strong, they have no power over their mind because a compulsion based on a habit overpowers all. It’s also the same, for example, for positiveness. Like for Lama Zopa Rinpoche, his compulsion is he doesn’t want to sleep, it’s a waste of time, sleeping. Even for his own health, he doesn’t care. For his own comfort, he doesn’t care. A hundred per cent, thousand per cent, always, always compulsion, sentient beings, sentient beings, helping sentient beings all the time. This I can say, I personally, I knew Rinpoche for my whole life. Since I know him, every second, his compulsion’s to help, to be of benefit, service, all the time, all the time, non-stop. We are so lucky like that. His Holiness is the same. They completely dedicated their whole entire life for benefiting sentient beings. We are so lucky to be able to share this planet with them, to be alive at the same time, so precious, so precious! We can watch Livestream or on YouTube, the teachings anytime we want. I think it’s almost like a golden age if we are able to see it that way. 

Of course, it’s also a habit that we overvalue negativity; a hundred good things happen, "Oh it’s OK", and one bad thing happens and we’ll say, "Oh, my god!", and then this becomes so important, so big, then there is no space for the positive. This also, we have to switch this kind of mentality: even if a hundred bad things happen, if one positive happens, focus on that, "Wow, the positive happened!" In that way, the negative becomes meaningless, it dissolves, and then the positive becomes important, that’s what prevails, that’s what stays. It’s the way we see things based on how we think: the way we think creates the attitude, the state of mind, so it’s very important to be aware of that. So the next time you get a compulsion, try to differentiate if it’s good or bad. Before you do it, think of the result, and if the intention isn’t egoist intention. If the intention is egoist, then most surely, the result is going to bring suffering. And the same goes for the positive: if the intention is positive, the result will bring satisfaction and happiness. So compulsion is also, can be very dangerous, but is always based on the habit.

Oh love, it’s beautiful. I think love has many, many different names, but in the end, it’s just a name, right, it’s a name to describe something, but love is everything, it’s everywhere. Love, the creation of life is love, the continuation of life is love, the result is love, everything is love. It’s becoming cheesy, no? Romantic. C’est très, très romantique. So maybe, you can give some words - what is love for you. Don’t be shy. 

Students: Joy, respect, sharing, acceptance, help, freedom, openness, generosity, compassion, comprehension So just from one word, look how many beautiful things come, so special! So I don’t have to say anything, you said everything.

This body is love, right, it’s magic. In French, you say: la magie, l’âme agit, no? How do you translate that in English? L’âme agit - the soul act. And la magie, the magic. The path. L’âme is the path, no? 

Translator: L'âme is the soul in French.

Ösel: Agit?

Translator:  The act. 

Ösel: The act of the soul is the magic, same, no? Similar. It’s a word game. My French is not so good. But I think His Holiness describes very well the warm heart, the desire to be a benefit, starting with yourself, love, love. It’s so difficult to really explain love. You can experience it, you can feel it, but when you try to put it in words, it loses a little bit of its essence. But the older we get, the better we understand what love is. I’m not saying young people are not wise, many young people are much wiser than older people. But yeah, love essentially is the true meaning of life – sharing and caring, something like that. It’s difficult to put in words because then it loses its...Robina, what is love for you? 

Ven. Robina: I can give you the Buddhist definition, that’s all. It’s the wish that others be happy and delight in others’ happiness.

Ösel: So 6:30 pm, anybody wants to finish up any last question or doubt or a constructive criticism, please. Feel welcome. 

Student: When you lack discipline, you feel guilty. So how to treat that? 

Ösel: OK, this is also something very important. So I have to go a little backwards first to get there, to talk about responsibility. Many times, people say, "It’s destiny, the universe already decided everything. I have no choice." So that is a very easy way of thinking. Sometimes even the Buddhists say, "Oh it’s your karma. It’s my karma." They justify like that. And then also there’s a part of guilt: It’s your fault. It’s my fault. We feel guilty. So you have to differentiate: there is no fault, it’s not like, oh, it’s your fault. It just happens like that based on your intention. So if you feel guilty in the end, it doesn’t really help. You can’t change anything with guiltiness. You know, it’s nobody’s fault. You just have to take responsibility, and then if it doesn’t work out, at least you learn, use it as a tool to improve. But if you’re like, "I did a mistake. It’s my fault. I feel guilty," then all you’re doing is wasting your time; you’re making yourself suffer. Maybe a little bit is OK so that next time you don't do it, but don’t overdo it this: Oh, poor me, I can’t do it.I don’t have the etc. That kind of mentality is very counterproductive. So there’s no need to feel guilty; just feel responsible. If you made that choice, you take the responsibility. And the next time, you take the responsibility. No excuses.

For example, if you are late to work, the boss doesn’t care. You can come up with a hundred excuses, your boss doesn’t care. All he cares is that you are on time, and you do your job properly. If you go and you’re like, "Oh no, there was a lot of traffic", "Oh today, in the shower, this happened. I fell down." Or this and this, the boss is going to tell you, "It’s not my concern, you are wasting my time, I don’t care. I don’t care why you’re late. Next time, be on time, and if it happens too much, I’m going to fire you." It’s a little bit like that. This guilty feeling is a little bit like that; it’s useless. If you are late to work, you should say, "I’m sorry I’m late", and you take the responsibility. And then you have maybe two more chances to be late, but you know that the third time, you’ll be fired. You take the responsibility, then instead of three possibilities, now you only have two. But by feeling guilty, you’re not really accomplishing anything. Is it good? Is it helpful? 

One more question then. 

Student: You talked a lot about intention. Can you explain a bit more? 

Ösel: OK, intention. Very, very important. Intention is the beginning of karma, at least, the individual karma. Your karma starts with intention. Based on intention, the karma can be big or small. So the action can be the same, but if the intention changes, it makes a big difference in the karma. Right now, I don’t have many examples, so I’m just going to say the example I normally use. It’s like the friend who’s drunk, and he wants to drive the car. He is completely drunk, and he doesn’t want to let go of the keys. He is going to drive. So the only way is you have to maybe hit him, or wrestle with him, or something like that, or shout at him, or something, with the intention of saving his life and and saving anybody who he will kill if he’s drunk. So the result of that karma is going to be very, very different from, for example, somebody who is really angry and just wants to hurt somebody. Maybe the action is the same, but the result is very different. The friend will say, "Thank you" tomorrow, and the other person will probably hate you. It will be a cycle. Maybe he’ll want to hit you back. The result is not a positive result. That’s intention. That’s an example. 

Also like intention, I think it’s important to clarify, maybe, the intention with the guru, for example. It is very important. Because for many people, sometimes the guru becomes like the girlfriend, obsessed: "Oh the guru looked at me", "the guru smiled at me". "Today the guru didn’t talk to me. I’m depressed. I didn’t see the guru, I need to see him more." It becomes an obsession. The guru will save me. If he doesn’t save me this life, he will save me in the next life, for sure. This is an egoist intention, attachment. And I’ve seen that in many different cases – everyone wants a piece of the guru. Maybe someone is having conversation, but you still want to impose yourself because you want the guru to look at you, to talk to you. You don’t care about anybody else, you just care about you, me. "My practice is important. I have a doubt I have to clarify. I don’t care about anybody else."

So then what’s happen? Like with your girlfriend, if the guru makes a bad face at you, then you get depressed. "Oh the guru’s angry with me. What did I do wrong?" It’s like the girlfriend, but the guru is not your girlfriend; He’s your best friend, he’s your Dharma friend. The guru is like a lighthouse, you know if you are on a ship and you’re lost, you have no orientation, so the lighthouse helps you to tell you: OK, be careful, warning. Here there are rocks; if you come nearby, you can crash and sink. Or he can tell you: Here there is land. You are coming close to your destination. But you’re not going to the lighthouse. If all the boats acted like the disciples of the gurus, all the lighthouses would be full of boats, crashed into them, abandoned boats. The lighthouses would be boats cemeteries. That’s not the case, right because the captains of the boats know that the lighthouse is only for orientation; it shows you where you have to go and where you have to avoid.

You are the captain of your boat, so you have to be able to differentiate what is your intention. Are you attached to the lighthouse or are you attached to your own evolution in order to be able to help sentient beings? That’s intention, very important, subtle intention that you have to be aware. Otherwise, it becomes like spiritual bypassing. Bypassing is like you jump over, for example, if there’s a highway here, you jump over. Bypass, spiritual bypass. So for example, you have maybe childhood trauma, you have psychological problems, maybe certain aspects, so you bypass that. You say, "Oh, I don’t need to work on myself." You put all your faith on your spirituality, on the guru or on the Dharma, but then maybe after 30 years practicing Dharma, you are more neurotic than when you started. So this is completely useless. I've seen this mistake many times. They try to spiritually bypass, just like His Holiness says, "Dharma doesn’t make you non-Christian, non-Muslim or non-Hindu. Actually Dharma helps you to become a better Christian, better Muslim, better Hindu." The same with spirituality it can help you to better overcome your trauma, overcome your psychosis, all your problems, your traumas, all these things, Dharma can help you. But don’t bypass it, and look for shelter with the guru and the Dharma, and that’s it, and then you forget about all these other things you have to work on. Otherwise, it becomes a waste of time, and very counterproductive. You get frustrated and then you get angry, and then you blame the guru, like we normally do. We always blame others for our own mistakes. It’s the result of being too proud – also that’s another aspect of intention. So always observe the intention, the very subtle form of intention. Everything starts with an intention. So we can finish there. Thank you for the question.

I hope I was able to clarify and not create more doubts – well, doubts are good actually. I don’t want to create confusion. Confusion also can be good because sometimes it’s like that: if we have doubts then we question things, and that helps us to understand better the path, because when you walk the path, you really know the path. If you get on a bus and you fall asleep, and the bus takes you somewhere, you don’t really know the path so well. So through the confusion, it helps you to clarify. So always question, like Shakyamuni Buddha said in his teachings: everything he says, you have to check like the alchemist checks the gold, the goldsmith, sorry. Before valuing something as gold, you pass the gold through the all process of making sure it’s gold. You don’t want to just take it all "Oh, it’s the truth." You have to walk your own truth, you have to understand your own path through the process of trial and error. OK, thank you so much.