Dear Jane,
The reason could be sexual misconduct in previous lives, or maybe you deeply disturbed other persons’ minds, not just the guru’s, but other persons’.

You need to purify this. It isn’t important which practice particularly, but do purification practice and thought transformation. We need depression to practice Dharma. If you’re depressed, you remember the suffering of sentient beings. If things are good you don’t practice Dharma; so, depression is good. Use purification and thought transformation.

You should also pray to Tara.